Who’s going to die in season six? Jenny? Most people seem to be leaning towards Jenny. This is ’cause everyone’s confusing “Who would I like to kill?” with “who’s gonna be killed.” Jenny will never die, she is immortal, like Satan.
The most telling part of this whole she-bang is the ominous “Jenny Schecter 2002-2008″ graphic that concludes the program. Not only does it imply that Mia looks hella old for a 6-year-old, it also serves to remind us that life begins and ends in the hands of our Creator, the Lord Above, Her Majesty Chief Alaskan Protection Community Coordinator Princess of the Lesbian Universe of All Peoples. The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away.
In a countdown of the best scenes of season four, we start with Jenny calling Stacey Merkin a vagina wig and take a break with the basketball game at number six. Scenes one through five are coming atcha soon.
Better is riding a tractor, Jenny is riding a raft, and Paige is riding Shane in the ’50s. Shining moments include scenes with the Lynch [who can do no wrong] and Dana Fairbanks [may she rest in peace].
Why are there twice as many lesbian squabbles as lesbian sexy moments in this show? Oh yeah, it’s because this is the way that we liveeeeeeeee. This is the one where Ilene reminds us all that men are disgusting, loathsome creatures by making henry cut his toenails.
The top three ways you can tell EZ-Girl wrote this episode? Max kissed mice when he was little, Tina likes movies that are very “visual”, and Catharine thinks drawing with lipstick is sexy. Luckily, Jenny just wants to take off her clothes in public.
Oh look! A special visit from The Ditty Bops! In this installment of our favorite saga, Alice says “what the frickin’ frack?!,” Max stlll has an unfortunately soulpatch, and Alice and Shane make us remember why vandalism can be fun.
Despite the fact that angus is a lying low-down nanny-fucking motherfucker, GIRLS ACTUALLY HAVE SEX THIS EPISODE. Even Kit and Papi. Ew, we know.
If Paige and Shane have already done the time then they might as well do the crime you know what I mean ladies?
It’s almost Valentine’s Day and Riese is sending out all her love. Luckily there’s lots to love in this episode with everyone looking very Shane today, the lesbian phone tree, Tasha being generally adorable, and of course: Angela Robinson.
This week in L Word University we learn how to say fuck in sign language, Phyllis assigns “The Whole Lesbian Sex Book,” and Alice and Jenny channel the masters.
First of all: Hellooooooo Paige! Someone tell Papi that she can be a chula without the Hobby Lobby hats, please. In other news, remember how you laughed the whole time they played basketball? Me too.
I hope you had sex this week because no one on The L Word did. Instead, Phyllis has a crush on Alice, Angus is Butter Boy, and Shane continues to feed Shay food that she should be eating.
Max would like to do an internet search for you and Jenny wants to wear doilies and scream about merkins. Can we talk about how cute Alice is as Ira Glass?
Have you heard about OurChart dot com? Helena’s poor, Shane can’t handle life, and Better wants arson arson! Also: OurChart. You should check it out.
We all know that foreplay’s what this show does best. Like a twatilicious lover, The L Word relishes in getting us all riled up and subsequently leaving us alone and naked on the couch with a lukewarm Dos Equis and tears in our eyes. “High and dry” I believe it’s called.
Autostraddle’s own Riese, Natalie, and Haviland went to The L Word season 4 premiere party. You should check out their adorable little code for “inappropriate.”
The L Word’s almost over!! Two short-but-sweet weeks from now, we’ll all be forced to look at each others’ faces and speak words to each other about actual life instead of funneling all our feelings into fictional characters who change personalities every season and often disappear suddenly without warning/explanation.
Why is it that ‘troubled’ and ‘effortlessly sexy’ always seem to go hand-in-hand? And what is it about the way they can lean? Riese looks at the dreamboys/bois in “My So-Called Life” and “The L Word.”
What do I have for you? I have some golden copies of a teleplay you might be interested in reading, yes? It’s from the pilot for The Farm. Have you seen any of these anywhere yet? I’m not really sure.