Just fyi, no one wants to look like they’re moving furniture when they’re fucking. In other news, Adele is creepily turning into Jenny and Phyllis’s daughter is a babe.
The last 20 minutes were some of the best I’ve seen on this show. It was fun and quality and featured all those verbs they sing about in that opening song we all cream over. Um, fighting, winning, fucking, whatevs. Up until that? Blah blah podcasts blah love cindy blah. You get the picture.
It’s that time ladies. Queue everyone’s head exploding. That’s right: Tina and Bette are back in love/made out. Also Alice is the perfect housewife and Jenny is the perfect roommate.
So guys: Ourchart. have you heard of it? OurChart, I mean. Are you on OurChart? Basically Peggy Peabody and Carlie’s Angels are the only redeeming facets of this godforsaken show.
Jenny is more Jenny than EVER this season, Shane fucks it up again, Helena’s even pretty in jail, and someone commits arson! arson! Oh yeah, and Alice and Tasha are cutehotadorablesexybeautifuletcetc.
Good news: on a scale of one to ten, this episode was “not bad!” There was a surprising amount of sex from miss i-never-give-the-girls-what-they-want chaiken, it was directed by Jamie Babbit, Foxy Brown came to the jailhouse, and Inconceivable showed up from ‘The Princess Bride.’
I AM THE ONLY trans guy ON CABLE! But instead of integrating me into your show, you’ve progressively emphasized how my differences make me at odds with the lesbian community and the only personality trait you’ve given me is “self-loathing.”
In honour of NYC pride, I’m hosting a Homosexy Lesbian Top 20 right here! On Autostraddle! Clearly Autowin is a very intellectual and highly cultivated space for intellectual discussions about Virginia Woolf, The Allegory of the Cave, Boy-briefs vs. thongs and sophisticated feminist theory. Auto-Straddle is where I talk crazy about silly things, like Max Sweeney and my 20 most favorite fictional lesbians from (relatively) mainstream pop culture.
But we fell in love with these characters in 2004 not because they self-mutilated or had fancy jobs on movie sets or had stalker/assistants or appeared on billboards; we loved them because they reminded us of us … just hotter, and living in West Hollywood. It was like our lives but burning a little brighter, and sexier, and richer … like most teevee shows are.
I’m putting almost all of my hours & energy & resources right now into making that stuff — the good stuff I’ve gotten out of this show, which is my new friends and connections online and in real life — into a project that I hope will reflect everything positive about our community and encourage intelligent, responsible, entertaining and progressive discourse & art.
It’s not a revolution … but it’s solid. It’s sweet, it’s snappy, it’s clever, smart, delicious. It gets away with things American teevee shows never try for. It’s everything television should be.
We had a special visitor from Australia (Oz, co-leader of The L Word Online ) and creator, head writer, director and executive producer of AfterEllen’s hit series Alexi’s Closet, Alexi Melvin. Because the “Fly Riese to LA and/or Haviland to NYC so they can vlog and watch The L Word together” fund is very empty (TIP JAR PEOPLE!), she obvs won’t be watching, but I did get everyone else to come, and this little post will end with all of Team Autostraddle telling YOU what they’ve liked best, and loathed, about The L Word thus far.
We count down the top ten Lesbian Literature Classics.
“Street Talk” is, without a doubt, on my personal Top Ten of monumental, earth-shattering, all-time life-changing television events. It’s right up there with Jordan Catalano & Angela Chase holding hands, Dana & Alice makin’ sweet love for the first time, Obama’s victory speech and that man-on-the-moon thing.
In the spirit of continuing season four roundup coverage, let’s count down the best quotes of the season.
Who’s going to die in season six? Jenny? Most people seem to be leaning towards Jenny. This is ’cause everyone’s confusing “Who would I like to kill?” with “who’s gonna be killed.” Jenny will never die, she is immortal, like Satan.
The most telling part of this whole she-bang is the ominous “Jenny Schecter 2002-2008″ graphic that concludes the program. Not only does it imply that Mia looks hella old for a 6-year-old, it also serves to remind us that life begins and ends in the hands of our Creator, the Lord Above, Her Majesty Chief Alaskan Protection Community Coordinator Princess of the Lesbian Universe of All Peoples. The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away.
In a countdown of the best scenes of season four, we start with Jenny calling Stacey Merkin a vagina wig and take a break with the basketball game at number six. Scenes one through five are coming atcha soon.
Better is riding a tractor, Jenny is riding a raft, and Paige is riding Shane in the ’50s. Shining moments include scenes with the Lynch [who can do no wrong] and Dana Fairbanks [may she rest in peace].
Why are there twice as many lesbian squabbles as lesbian sexy moments in this show? Oh yeah, it’s because this is the way that we liveeeeeeeee. This is the one where Ilene reminds us all that men are disgusting, loathsome creatures by making henry cut his toenails.