Ellen Page Dot Lesbian Dot Com

So basically what happened is that a socio-economic activist blogger had some feelings about people “in Hollywood” using their fame and money to support a cause, while at the same time not coming out of the closet or introducing you to their life partners. Or, in the author’s words: “I have enough of false heroes and fake acts of honesty and sincerely. I have enough of Hollywood’s spineless greedy mentality slithering its way into human misery and feeding from it like a parasite.” That’s more descriptive.

via suicideblonde

Specifically, the blogger felt like, with June being Pride month and the gays making strides all up and down the place, there should be more famous people standing up for the “oppressed gay minority.” The author said that presenting yourself as a good person but then not telling everyone you’re gay boiled down to hypocrisy.

The blogger went on to say that Ellen Page is a lesbian and also a hypocrite. Here:

“Ellen Page believes in truth? Here is the truth. A reliable source, which (in parts) agrees with my standpoint, revealed to V-Generations some of Ellen Page’s relationships she had. Like with fellow actors Ben Foster, Mark Rendall or Slim Twig or her female lovers Drew Barrymore and Clea Du Vall. (Note: I haven’t included non-famous people. No need to drag them into the mess.)”

Ok so then ONTD linked to the story (“story”) and the blogger’s readership jumped from 250 a month to 26,000 in two days and then The Most Cake picked it up and now I have to write about it, much in the spirit of Evan Rachel Wood Bisexual.

So! Here are my points, both tangential and related, in list-form:

1. Gay people know when other gay people are gay. I don’t know why or how, but we do. If you’re a gay celebrity, we know you’re gay. Ricky Martin being gay isn’t news. Ricky Martin coming out, on his own, to say that he’s gay, kind of is.

2. The process of ‘outing’ anyone, especially famous people, is tired and perpetuates the idea that being gay is weird or shameful.

3. I watched Outrage and had some mixed feelings about the outing of gay politicians, eventually coming to the conclusion that yes, I agree with Kirby Dick: if you’re actively discriminating against gays, via making laws or speeches or even bad jokes, and you’re gay, you should be called out.

4. Ellen Page isn’t passing oppressive legislation or publicly denouncing homosexuality in an effort to further her career.

5. It seems like the negative repercussions of outing celebrities aren’t considered to be as serious as the negative repercussions of outing classmates or co-workers.

6. Ellen Page has pretty eyes.

How do you feel about all of these feelings? Is outing a public figure just a necessary step in the fight to normalize gay? When, if ever, is a person obligated to say they’re not straight? Are celebrities and politicians better able to navigate the fallout of being honest about their sexuality than other people? Are there any unflattering photos of Ellen Page? What’s your favorite Ellen Page outfit? Chuck / Fuck / Marry: Michelle Rodriguez, Kristen Stewart or Ellen Page?

 

 


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Laneia is the Executive Editor and founding member of Autostraddle, and you're the reason she's here. She's 37, has two kids, two dogs, one cat, one Megan, and some personal essays.

Laneia has written 802 articles for us.

132 Comments

  1. As a gay girl who often in the past hit on straight girls: gay people don’t always know when people are gay. Oh, and I would fuck michelle rodriguez… and kristen stewart… and ellen page. wait, what was the question?

    • Yes, this. Brain-twizzling question… Ellen is too cute _not_ to marry, I’d feel bad chucking Kristen, but even though ‘Michie likes sausage’, she is very hot…
      A Bicycle Built For Two, yours is the answer I was searching for!

      PS – why does the ‘Like’ button not work on iPhone (or am I being thick)?

  2. “weeeeeell.. it had a VERY cute pic of elp and a girl kissing with it, and that was all that mattered to me.”

    As the picture didn’t show either’s girl’s face it’s meaningless.

    Seems like the “truth” according to the “reliable source” is that EP is into both guys and girls. Just like maybe a few hundred other actresses in Hollywood. Why is this news?

    • Indeed! Why does it need to be labels anyway? Can’t people just be “sexual”? Doesn’t make you any less able or even responsible for supporting queer people’s rights.

  3. I agree with all of this all of it!!!
    chuck michele rodriguez dius turn off
    fuck kristen stewart runaways style
    marry ellen motherfucking page (yeah that’s her foreal middle name)
    Same political issues cute as hell and just overall awesome and she can act

  4. I think that if Harvey Milk could see how we’re acting and treating one another regarding the issue of being “out” he would scream, “THAT’S NOT WHAT I MEANT!!!!”

    When he supported and advocated for people coming out of the closet, he wanted them to make the decision themselves. He never would want us to be at each other throats about it. Or telling this celeb they’re not gay enough (a la Adam Lambert posing with a female), or that celeb they’re ruining our lives by remaining in the closet.

    ….sorry for the dramatics. But this issue really gets to me. I hate seeing people tear each other down with this in today’s media. And don’t think it does any service to Milk’s legacy. AND it’s a distraction from other issues.

  5. If gay celebrities want to come out and help the community out that way, more power to them. But they shouldn’t have to bear the burden if they don’t want to.

    Let’s not out people, it doesn’t make the community look any more welcoming to the closeted out there, and it doesn’t help us at large to make some of our fellow queers’ lives more difficult just for kicks.

  6. No. I disagree with outing people unless they are actively being despicable, e.g. closeted politician making anti-gay laws. Actors in hollywood, in my opinion, don’t fall into this category. We can speculate all we want, but honestly, Ellen Page doesn’t owe it to ANYONE to come out except maybe herself and only if she wants to, when she wants to.

    This kind of thing makes me angry. People should be out if they want to, and it makes me ridiculously happy every time a famous person comes out. I honestly think this will happen more and more as time goes on and it becomes easier to be gay. Outing people is wrong. As a lot of us non-famous people know, being outed SUCKS. It is a bad experience. I don’t wish it on others, famous or not, obviously gay or not.

    • Although I do understand that weird feeling of frustration I, as a queer person, feel when to me it seems “obvious” that such-and-such famous person is also gay. Like, if they would just come out I would feel oddly validated when I fantasized about our future gay wedding in the park with kittens and sun tea and lilies everywhere!

      But then, you know, I remember I’m a broke college student with no plans to ever live in Hollywood and meet famous people and mostly I just like looking at Ellen Page and KStew’s face on my teevee and would never know what to say in real life.

  7. I also agree with Kirby Dick re: outing the haters that are gay. I don’t think it’s productive or helpful to out someone who is a gay rights supporter when they are clearly not comfortable with being out/maybe just don’t think it’s anyone’s f*cking business, which I get.
    Come on, lookit those eyes. Take the high road, ppl.
    Fuck Michelle Rodriquez, Marry Kristen Stewart, who would promptly Chuck me because we are too dark and broody for each other, at which point Ellen Page would swoooop in and we’d get married by Elvis.

  8. I understand the frustration with celebrities who don’t come out because I definitely feel that way and i honestly think coming out is really, really helpful to the community especially as a public figure… but I think that “outing” someone is just wrong and a total invasion of their privacy (unless they are actively being hypocrites/ are actively hurting gay peeps). People should be able to decide when/where/why they want to come out and shouldn’t be dragged out.

    F: Michelle Rodriguez M: Ellen Page K: Kristin Stewart (I have an unaccountable loathing for her)

      • Good question. I think there’s a huge difference between someone who never talks about her personal life, and those who actively go out of their way (or just have to answer a lot of questions) to denounce the gay rumours, a la M-Ro. In the former case, it’s not an issue of being “out”; it’s a matter of privacy. In the latter, you’re just being an asshat if you really are gay but go around talking about allll the cock you love gettin’.

        I think Ellen’s in the former category. If it wasn’t for AS, I’d never suspect Ellen or K-Stew as being “closeted” – I have enough female celebrities to ship and speculate over without adding those two lol

      • I guess closeted-or-out is something of a false dichotomy, since there are degrees of both. IDK. In my own life, it seems like people often confuse shame with a desire for privacy. Of course, it’s different for celebrities because people totally ARE intrusive and disrespectful of their privacy. But in general, I don’t think the existence of a boyfriend or girlfriend is really “that’s private” territory.

  9. I do think that criticizing actors based on our perceived senses of their sexual orientations not being the same as what they say it is, especially when they are totally and vocally supportive of gay things, is pretty pointless. Especially when an actor’s job and life really has pretty little to do with these issues, in contrast to a politician whose job is about giving us or taking away rights. And especially especially when, regardless of how fans feel about her or her potential gayness, the only ‘evidence’ is a BLOG POST with a “source” alleging people she’s slept with. I mean. I wrote a blog post about, like, cheese once. That is not journalism.

    • Also this. My second reaction, after the wait-doesn’t-everyone-already-know-she’s-gay, was how is this at all a legit anything? It’s a blog post, siting an unnamed source, with a random picture of her kissing some chick. Not exactly hard “evidence” of anything.

  10. I think there’s a difference between denying being queer when you are, and just not talking about your private life to the press. From what I’ve seen, Ellen does the latter. Which is her right, no matter her sexual orientation. I understand the reasoning behind wanting celebrities to come out, but at the end of the day it comes down to right to privacy. Even people in the public eye have a right to a private life (which is why I hate the paparazzi and love that AS doesn’t go there).

    • If every one approached the media this way the world would be a happier place for famous wonderful people like Ellen Page. Well, I’m assuming she’s wonderful, but like probably.

  11. I’m also in favor of outing the haters but letting other famous people be — let them come out in their own choice of time and place. Coping with the downside of fame is bad enough, I’m sure. Jodie Foster gets tremendous sympathy from me. My feelings about closeted folks have been refined considerably over the years. I have more conflicted feelings when the closeted person is someone I know, especially when they expect me to participate in their deception. I wouldn’t out them, but I have actively distanced myself from folks in that situation, because I’ve been out and proud for years. I don’t have time to keep track of other people’s cover stories.

  12. I’ve had some really good discussions with others about the subject of people in Hollywood coming out. I’ve always personally felt no one should be forced out (unless, like you said, you’re actively anti-gay yet closeted, that shit needs to be exposed) because there’s so many factors in a person’s journey in coming out. It’s such a personal decision that you have to be ready for, because it’s no small feat whether you’re coming out to your parents or to an audience.

    That’s said, I really do wish more actors and actresses would come out. If I was in such a public position I’d feel that it was duty to be out, be an example to others as well as support my community in some way. Unfortunately not everyone feels that way and it’s their choice.

    I really hate it when people think someone ‘owes us’ something, particularly coming out. What someone feels like they have a responsibility to do in any type of activism falls on them and what they think.

    Oh and M: Page, F: MRod, K: KStew.

    • “That’s said, I really do wish more actors and actresses would come out. If I was in such a public position I’d feel that it was duty to be out”

      Many articles have been writen about how restrictive it is to be an out gay in Hollywood. Here’s a recent one by Jane Lynch:[url]http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/01/13/jane-lynch-studios-wont-cast-gay-leading-actors_n_808820.html[/url].

      However Laneia is wrong about the blogger – they were apparently saying Ellen is bisexual not a lesbian (with of course no proof at all). As Angelina, Drew etc. have proven, that doesn’t seem to affect your career.

  13. I wish there was a picture of me kissing a pretty girl at a food truck circulating the internet.

    …I really just wish I was kissing a pretty girl.

    (I really-really just wish there was a food truck nearby)

    Main feeling – celebrities are people too…no one ever hate-mailed me saying I was obligated to come out for the good of queerkind.

  14. A couple weeks ago I saw a picture of E. Page in a locker and someone had captioned it with “look, Ellen Page is in a closet! How appropriate!” It infuriated me on two levels, the first being that it was a locker, not a closet, and the second being that they felt they had the right to 1. assume her sexuality and 2. criticize her for it. I wouldn’t want someone doing that to me, so why should we do it to her? Who cares if she’s famous.

  15. I think everyone deserves the right to their own time to come out (if ever), or living their lives however they want.

    It is THEIR life. We as gays do not have some kind of commitment to all gaykind to rip people out of the closet because we need more visible/popular numbers. If you really want your favorite celeb to come out, how about sending their agent or publicist the number/info of an experienced and confidential LGBT counselor in their area. Worth a shot.

    I myself was outed by an ex of mine who wanted to make a scene (she was crazy, not like haha moody/bitchy crazy like belongs in an institution I am serious crazy.) It was at a very very bad time in my life and caused a lot of people to abandon me, due to circumstances. I also have a very super conservative “America Fuck yeah!” family. So not only was I suddenly outed, I was pretty much very alone save for a few people.

    SO! You never know what’s going on in people’s lives and a lot of straight people *CAN* VIEW YOU BEING GAY/QUEER/ETC AS SOMETHING YOU HAVE BEEN LYING TO THEM ABOUT ALL OF YOUR LIFE. People do not like being “lied” to.

    Take that to Hollywood where once your name is slightly smeared the press and paps do everything they can to smear it so bad you can’t even recognize it anymore.

  16. While I believe that more people in the public eye should come out, I am not a fan of yanking everyone out of the closet.
    Yes, if someone is creating hateful legislation, I can understand showing their hypocrisy and exposing them. As you said in #3, if you are “actively discriminating…you should be called out.” But not everyone fits in that category.
    I think when we force celebrities to come out, we don’t take into consideration that they have families who they may or may not be comfortable telling yet. We don’t take into consideration that it is their own lives, and generally it isn’t any of our business who they are intimate with.
    Overall, yanking people out of the closet makes it feel like the person is being called out on some sort of bad/criminal behavior. And I don’t know of anyone who wanted/wants to be forced out the closet before they are ready.

  17. I don’t think anyone EVER has the right to out someone else.

    However, I hope someday everyone loudly proclaims their gayness so that I can have sex with them, especially Ellen Page. Or Michelle Rodriguez. Or Kristen Stewart.

    Maybe I can do that anyway? Hey ladies, if you’re reading, I have some moves. Just look at my blog. See? CALL ME.

  18. The frustration that I feel is that Ellen Page champions the decline of the honey bee and vocally supports feminist causes but omits gay rights. If she came out it wouldn’t change my life or anything, but to have such a cool, successful woman on team would make me happy.

  19. I don’t know much about Ellen Page apart from the fact she is very qt and I always somehow assumed she was a lesbian. I am not sure why the writer of that blog post thinks it is necessary to “out” her, it doesn’t seem infuriating to me that she choses to not talk about her sexuality.

    I don’t even know if she is one of those that gets a “beard” to pretend she is straight, but if she were, while it would be a bit disappointing/upsetting that she chooses that path, she isn’t committing a crime or being publicly hateful against the community or anything that is remotely worth of having shit thrown to her. I just think outing people is WRONG. It is wrong to out a classmate to their whole school, it IS wrong outing an actress to the entire internet/world.

    I’d have sex with Kristen btw. Lots of it, probably.

  20. I agree with the comments on here that are against outing anyone, unless that person is actively fighting against queer folk (e.g. certain politicians and hate-spewing religious leaders).

    I understand that if people had not been brave (for e.g. with abolition, women’s lib, civil rights, and now queer rights), we would never have moved forward in society at all. But not everyone can be like Emily right off the bat. Some of us are like Naomi. It takes us a little while to be brave. And some don’t feel the need to share their personal lives with the public ever.

    If someone is not ready to come out or is a private person in general, that is their right. Whether they choose to share their straight lives with fans, or be out and proud, or don’t talk about their lives at all or even vehemently deny being queer, as long as they aren’t actively fighting against our cause, we should leave them the hell alone.

  21. I think it would be nice if we had more out celebrities, but I had a really hard coming out and I would never put someone down for not coming out if they didn’t want to. Its their life not mine, I don’t know where they’re coming from

  22. This actually touches on something I was thinking about a few days ago, as I’m kind of going through that post-self-realization-of-my-own-proclivities thing where I suddenly realize, “Oh my god! Anyone could be gay!” And then I think I know for a fact when they are. Like, my sister is probably getting really sick of me pointing at people in public and saying, “That chick’s totally a lesbian.” BUT! While I kind of want to take pride in this and see it as a superpower or something, at the same time, I worry that all I’m doing is relying on stereotypes to make these judgments, and even if in a way I’m just “reclaiming” those stereotypes, am I not also reinforcing them?!

    And also a good 75% of the time it’s just wishful thinking on my part that certain girls are gay, but that’s a lesbian horse of a different color.

  23. Not sure what happened to my other comment with regard to the F, C or M choices…

    I think I said something along the lines of that photo of Kristen Stewart is feckin hot so she would be my F choice and possibly my M choice. And then after that it is hard for me to decide. I love the hoodie/beanie-with-Chuck look that Ellen does. Also love the Chuck-wearing outfits that Kristen has as well. And I can’t decide if I like T-shirt-and-grease Michelle or leather jacket, hot boots and tight pants wearing Michelle, as in this pic:
    http://www.denimology.com/2009/03/Genetic%20Denim_-_Michelle_Rodriguez_-_Photocall_of_Fast_and_Furious_in_Rome_-_March_25_4_.jpg

    http://SoNotStraight.tumblr.com

  24. Yeah, I mean everyone knows Anderson Cooper, Ellen Page, etc. are gay. I can understand that we always want and hope people celebrated in the public eye will come out and further the cause. But we can’t force them to come out or out them. You don’t know someone else’s life or circumstances. As long as they aren’t spreading hate, why is it our business? I am all for outing anyone who lobbies for anti-gay causes (it’s no coinky-dink the people who push the hardest get caught with a Rent-A-Boy in the Bahamas) but other than that, I think it’s wrong. I am not out to everyone I know. I’d like to think if I were a beautiful successful well-liked actress, I’d be able to be out. But people’s reasons for staying in the closet may be something totally separate from that. We don’t know and we can’t judge.

    She does have pretty eyes though. I love Ellen Page. Not in like a “I wanna have her finger babies” way. More of just, “I wanna be her BFF because she’s so cool” way. Plus, if I could go around telling lesbians that I am totally BFFs with Ellen Page, imagine how much pussy I’d get.

  25. I have a lot of feelings on being out and outness and outing other people and a lot of them are very confused. I was hoping that a comment here would have verbalized my feelings but that didn’t happen.

    Alas.

    Also: c: kstew f: ellen page m: mrod. srlsy.

  26. I am kind of confused. A ton of websites have brought up Ellen and Clea being a couple for a while now. These are major websites stating here is Ellen and her girlfriend Clea. That photograph the blogger used is said to have been photoshopped from a movie. The blogger, who scares me with the way they talk so angrily about Ellen Page, has already been talked about for a long time for previous rants against Ellen Page on various websites.

    I guess what I am wondering is how is Autostraddle in the dark and why would Autostraddle act as if this blogger originated some rumor when a possible Ellen/Clea romance has been talked about since the Spring of 2011. I can understand Oh No They Didn’t not being aware of certain gossip but surprised Autostraddle is not aware.

    • no it wasn’t an issue of being in the dark about anything — we had the ellen / clea picture on tumblr when it came out — this article exists because when the internet freaks out about gay girls, being a gay website, we have to talk about it, even when it’s not really news to any of us. see: evan rachel wood bisexual.

  27. If that photo is even of her, I’m pretty sure making out with a girl in front of a food stand isn’t too closeted a behavior. Just sayin’.

    Anyway, it’s not okay to strip people of their right to choose just because you don’t agree with those choices, which is essentially what this whole outing business is to me.

    • My final decision has come down to this as well. I like KStew’s pouty-ness and I like to imagine the sex would be great, but Ellen Page seems like the best gf material. And MRod I just don’t care about much (sorry), so yeah.

  28. Michelle Rodriguez was legitimately the only reason I enjoyed Avatar. As well as the only reason I watched it twice.
    So without further ado: marry Ellen, fuck Michelle, and chuck Kristen (but still give her my phone number)

  29. Sometimes it’s more fun to not know, because when it comes down to it, we probably aren’t going to be hanging out at the same drunk karoake nights and have a slim chance in hellfire of ever getting in to any of those glorious pants. Definitely the best and hardest fuck, chuck, or marry. I vote polygamy.

  30. Well,

    I know Ellen likes the ladies, that’s not the issue.

    I just WANT her to come out so I can be reassured and then brag to all of my friends that I was right.

    I want to marry all three of those pictured ladies Esp Ellen she’s canadian and tiny

  31. Chuck Kristen Stewart, fuck Michelle Rodriguez, marry Ellen Page definitely. K-Stew is hot but not as hot as Michelle Rodriguez and OBVIOUSLY I have to choose Ellen Page to marry because she’s so adorable and funny and also have you seen her?!

  32. 1. Whether or not someone is gay if they’re not actually out, doesn’t really matter to me, unless, like you said, they actively fighting against us. Thinking, dreaming and mildly speculating is worth way more to me than the media putting a label on someone who does not want it, regardless of their reason.

    2. Even if Ellen Page is the straightest arrow in wherever they keep arrows, she’s still a proper delicious weirdo in main-streem media.

    • Arrows are kept in a quiver. And although I highly doubt Ellen Page is the straightest arrow in the quiver, I agree with you. The fact that she likes CocoRosie and can juggle and wears grey skinny jeans with Converse on the regular is cool whether she’s gay or straight or whatever.

  33. No celebrity ever has to owe it to anyone that they need to come out. They’re people too. They could be in the closet for a variety of reasons that we do not need to be privy to.

    Outing is not a “tired” act. In some circles, it’s difficult to come out for yourself and even worse when someone does it for you. Even if you wouldn’t care if someone outed you, others don’t feel that way. Respect other people’s decisions to stay in the closet even if their reasons are not something you agree with. Celebrities should not be treated any differently because of their position in the public eye.

  34. My thoughts:
    A) if the list of people that she’s being “outed” as dating includes dudes as well as chicks, it seems more like she’s private about her love life than in the closet.
    B) if she’s kissing girls in public places around people that have cameras and hanging around clea Duvall, she can’t be that concerned with staying in the closet
    C) ellen page coming out as liking girls would not do very much to change the political climate or further gay rights
    D) how she identifies is up to her, not us
    E) chuck Kristen, marry and fuck Michelle, be best friends forever with ellen

  35. Why is the gayest profession (seriously, the gayest) in the world, so homophobic? :\

    Why *do* actors out themselves for all sorts of potentially unpopular causes or charities that might flame the very people who pay to see their movies (I’m talking Republicans / Conserves / middle America).. yet they still won’t OWN their very own cause?

    “Privacy”, you say? I’m not sold 🙂

    “They don’t believe a gay actor can play straight”, you say? Jodie Foster, Spacey, etc.

    I think it’s us. By “us” I mean the gay actors. I think in 2011 the prejudice & paranoia is actually coming FROM US. Not from straight viewers.

  36. Outing celebrities is a bunch of bullshit. It’s exactly like you said: the gays know who’s gay, more or less. A friend of mine actually went to school with Ellen Page and he told me she was a lesbian, but that doesn’t make it cool to out her. And for someone to out her because they think they’re pro-porting a gay agenda or something is messed up. It’s just like outing someone in high school.

    Also, thanks for reminding me of the Ellen Page gallery. ^_^

  37. Not to be a pedant… but I’m getting a bit confused by the language being used. Maybe it is a North America/Britain thing…

    When people describe Ellen as ‘gay’, then discuss anti-‘gay’ laws, I wonder if they mean ‘queer’.

    Because to my British eyes, writing about someone being ‘gay’, means that you are describing them as monosexual, of the homosexual variety. Thus ignoring the fact that (if the rumours are true), Ellen has dated men and women and would most likely be placed in the bisexual box (if the hand of God reached down and decided to put everyone in boxes for the day… can you imagine the party inside them?)

    Is this more of the bi-invisibility that was briefly discussed on the other post? [ http://www.autostraddle.com/you-need-help-its-a-hard-knock-life-for-bisexuals-102441/#comments ]

    Or am I failing to conflate the word ‘gay’ with ‘queer’ into the encompassing sentiment intended, i.e. non-heterosexual…?

    • BioGal
      I’m a bit confused too. Laneia’s writes that the blogger says Ellen is a lesbian. Clearly that’s incorrect – the blogger seems to be contending that Ellen is bisexual. I don’t think we should be using gay/lesbian and bi interchangeably either.

      “Thus ignoring the fact that (if the rumours are true), Ellen has dated men and women and would most likely be placed in the bisexual box”

      As a point of interest, I heard Ellen talk about being in bed with a boyfriend on a Leno interview.

    • re: language, as we’ve seen in the comments on this site at least 45938478 times, gay / lesbian / bi / queer actually do mean different things to different people, especially in different countries.

      you say ‘gay’ means ‘monosexual’ to you, but in the US, ‘gay’ usually just means ‘homosexual man’ but because i dislike that narrow use of the word, i use ‘gay’ to mean ‘not straight.’

      an irish friend of mine wrote a piece for us a couple of years ago and i used the word ‘queer’ to describe her in the intro. she emailed to say that ‘queer’ held negative connotation for her and she felt its definition didn’t fit her identity, so we changed it. to us — riese and me — ‘queer’ is one of our favorite labels, because it feels inclusive and broad, like it wouldn’t offend most people. but that’s to us.

      as illustrated in some previous comments on AS, even the word ‘lesbian’ means different things to different people.

      it would be great (?) if all of the world could agree on the exact definition of every label, but that’s not going to happen. i feel like it’s more productive to focus on the context and actual issues than it is to dedicate hours/days trying to write a dictionary.

  38. You’re mad on the internet, so you start outing people. Well that’s fair. Celebrity or not everyone is entitled to a private life.

    Okay so I think not being loud n proud is slightly different from being closeted, and the world is full of speculation. But seriously, who cares who is gay or not. A role model should be just that for the actions they take, not who they fuck. Can we move on from labeling people already and just leave them to get on with their jobs?

  39. I do think that LGBT celebrities should come out. Anna Paquin, Evan Rachel Wood and Vanessa Carlton are so awesome for coming out as Bi recently and they have done wonders in terms of visibility. Look, if you are bi and conventionally attractive, coming out won’t hurt your career. So if Ellen Page is, she should come out.

    BUT I’m not sold that she’s not straight. Maybe she is! Maybe she is just friends with Clea DuVall and Drew Barrymore because they are nice ladies. Pink is straight, even though she has lez-face.

  40. all i’m saying is the girl’s from nova scotia and i have friends that live in halifax and around there who say her gayness is pretty common knowledge up there.

  41. I have lots of complicated feelings about this.

    I feel like the more queer people in the public eye who come out, the better. It might help that one kid somewhere.
    I feel most strongly about this in relation to a certain footballer here in the UK. It’s gone beyond persistent rumours and is now essentially common knowledge that he’s gay. If that is actually true, I would love for him to come out but only because it’s such a homophobic environment and if anything needs more diversity it’s the football world. But because it is so homophobic, it’s understandable that he doesn’t want to risk his career.

    So I’m conflicted about the ‘responsibility’ that famous people have to come out. What I’m not conflicted about is the fact that no one should ever out anyone else. That this blogger thinks he has the right to out Ellen Page – who of all people doesn’t deserve this cos seriously what has she ever done to anyone I mean really – is pretty hideous.

  42. While I agree that the more queer celebrities who come out, the better it is for all, I can totally understand why some of them aren’t jumping at the bit to do so.

    When your livelihood is dependent on how many fans you can bring in (for movies, games/matches, tv shows, etc), if you are thinking about job security at all, you WILL think about your co-workers and the general public’s reaction. And if you know that the reaction will be mostly negative then it is that much harder to come out.

    For e.g. a queer professional footballer coming out has a few big obstacles to face:
    http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2010/feb/10/can-gay-footballers-come-out
    So even if rumours are rampant, that person might be thinking along the lines of
    “It is better to be thought of as queer than to open my mouth and erase all doubt! Because unless I say the words with my own mouth then my teammates/co-workers/fans/insert-others-here will not have undeniable proof for them to reject me.”

    It’s the same struggle happening in many non-famous people’s lives right now.

    Again, it comes back to how much each individual is willing to sacrifice and how brave each person can be.

    http://SoNotStraight.tumblr.com

  43. Couldn’t agree more- especially with #3 and #6. Again, I think outing someone goes against our cause. It makes being queer feel like something that needs to be hidden or shamed instead of celebrated. And I think it’s also good to keep in mind that celebrities have lives beyond what the public sees. Coming out can be very confusing and it can bring up LOTS of issues with family, close friends, etc. Celebrities are people too with their own families, issues, and personal journeys to go through and I wish people would respect that more than they often do.

    • Unfortunately, I’ve heard that Freeheld’s had issues with funding and is sorta on hold at the moment. :\ Which sucks. I was looking forward to seeing Ellen in it.

  44. I am kinda of confused here. Doesn’t the article state that she dated male and female actors/actresses… Doesn’t that make her bi-sexual? I just wanted to clearify because I would love to know I still had a chance.

  45. marry Ellen Paige (obvs), fuck Michelle Rodriguez, chuck Kristen Stewart cause she’s an annoying sellout (except for when she was in Speak & that one scary movie where her character got her brother into that car accident)

  46. firstly: marry ellen, chuck michelle, fuck fuck fuck kristen over and over.

    secondly, my thoughts re: this article is a lot of sadness. im pretty sure all of us have ALWAYS known that ellen page is a big gaymo (duh). but im canadian, and my family is also from nova scotia (shes from halifax) and you kind of have to be a maritimer to understand this, but there is a HUGE sense of community/family/being tied to the maritimes for your entire life.
    so, as ive been told by multiple friends/family members who live in halifax, ellen was openly out in the city, went to gay bars with her girlfriend, etc. yet for some reason this lovely city NEVER outed her to the media. they respected her choice to remain officially “ambiguous” about her sexual orientation, if you will.
    and while over the years ive had a few feelings of like “wow, if ellen came out she could do so much for the gay community in canada”, i also fully believe that just because shes famous that shouldnt remove her right to make personal decisions on what she does and does not share with the public regarding who she goes to bed with at night. and im sure that she had reasons for not making a big statement about her sexuality and coming out to the media and/or hollywood.
    and whatever those reasons were, whether we consider them valid or not, they were HER reasons, and thats what matters.

    SO, it makes me very sad that a grumpy blogger decided to take ellen’s personal life in his own hands and out her purely due to ANGER.

    i dont believe in “outing”
    (but i do believe in ellen page.)

    • Ami
      You say “i don’t believe in outing” but that exactly what you did in your post. There’s lots of anecdotal information out there to support the fact that’s she into both girls and guys.

      For a Hollywood actress, there’s a big difference between being perceived as bi or being perceived as lesbian.

  47. It isn’t fair to out anyone who is minding their own business in the closet, even a celebrity, when they don’t want to come out. It’s not like being celebrities gives them the moral imperative to be shining role models for everyone else. They’re just people like us. With complicated lives and emotions and shit. Also, I agree with point 6.

  48. actually, I call bullshit on all of this.

    You can’t suck face with your alleged girlfriend in Marie Claire magazine to promote your movie, and then claim “privacy.”

    http://www.drfunkenberry.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/09/ellen-page-drew-barrymore-kiss-03-271×410.jpg

    Either you get to suck face to promote your movie and be out as bi/lesbian/queer/”I just love people not genitals, no label please,” or you get to live privately in the closet.

    I think we’re coming to the defense of Ellen Page because we value her talentsand find her attractive. In this case though, I think it’s fair to call out her hypocrisy.

  49. On another note, I don’t fully understand the pressure to publicly come out that’s placed on celebrities.

    Just like the author said, there’s a difference between knowing someone is gay and their coming out process.
    Ellen Paige could very well be out in her personal life and just refuse to answer the questions of nosy-ass strangers. There’s nothing wrong with that.

    PS. Fuck: Michelle Rodriguez
    Chuck: Michelle Rodriguez
    Marry: Rose Rollins!
    Yes.

  50. I find the claim that “gay people know when other people are gay”(#1) very spurious. What is this based on, judging people by tired stereotypes? I didn’t just come out of the closet, I was jumping yelling out of it – and still people didn’t take me seriously or read me as queer (or anything *with* a sexuality for that matter). Also many people do seem “queer” but are straight and get into a lot of hassle for not looking or being normative enough one direction or the other. Not to mention that people’s sexualities are often too complicated for a three-paragraph article in some tabloid – you ever hear about anyone mainstream being polyamourous or gay-with-an-exception or straight-with-an-exception or some other sort of weird-ish combination that takes a while to explain? Add all that up, and the premise of “just knowing” collapses.

  51. I wonder if the outing was done vengefully? Maybe it’s less about how Page has an obligation toward gay teens, and more that the person outing her is mad that she’s successful? Like, “Look at me, the average gay person who has struggled and faced discrimination, and Ellen Page has this awesome career. *She* hasn’t suffered for being gay and it’s not fair!”
    Anyhow, I agree that it’s not any of my business (or anyone else’s) unless the person is a gay politician creating anti-gay legislation.

    Ditch: Kristen
    Fuck: Michelle
    Marry: Ellen

  52. Trying to out Ellen Page is ridiculous I mean who’s outing Lady Gaga as transgender, and for that matter if any of my many screenplays I’ve actually been writing ever get’s picked (which is actually looking kind of likely now) I’m gonna change my name, and obviously I’m not gonna let anyone know about who I really am, let alone that I’m bi, or how I wasn’t exactly born a normal person.

  53. Just be who you are…if you love a person same sex, then to hell with others opinions. I blame religion for most of the hate in the world, esp against gays. If I had my way, Id ban religion as a hate organization.

  54. Banning religion? Banning is the realm of religion, no shellfish, no gay sex? We don’t need any more banning. We need educated and rational discussions. Religion is just an echo of the human psyche, there are dark ugly bits, and beautiful, kind bits. There are plenty of religions that support gay folks too, do you want to ban those as well?

  55. Maybe they don’t come out because they don’t know what they “are”. Maybe they, like many, many people of varying sexual preferences, do not like to feel labeled. Maybe they feel it is no one else’s business. Maybe they don’t want that label to be the one thing everyone immediately associates with them; perhaps they’d rather gain recognition for being good at what they do. Maybe they think it’s funny to keep people guessing.
    A better question than whether or not celebrities have a “duty” to come out might be, why do we want them to so badly? Do we need them to, so we can feel validated? Like, see family and friends, that actress from the movie you like is gay, so it’s ok and maybe even kind of cool, right?
    It is disrespectful to shine a light on someone that they didn’t ask for. Period.

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