• snow posted an update in the group Group logo of Clean & Sober AutostraddlersClean & Sober Autostraddlers 6 years, 11 months ago

    wow, after about 6 months with no meetings I feel pretty awful. I’m sober, but not happy…most people would tell me to go to a meeting already, but for some stubborn reason I won’t, at least not at this point. has anyone been through this?

    • I have been there! When I isolate, it’s usually because I’m depressed, and since I also have low self-esteem it’s hard to tell the difference between the two. The most important component of meetings is the social support network. Have you ever tried a queer 12-step group? For me, when I was having a super hard time dealing with my own gayness, I found queer meetings really affirming. Seeing sober gay people laughing and enjoying life made me realize THAT COULD BE ME TOO SOMEDAY even if I didn’t believe it yet. I’m sending you hugs over the interwebs! Message me if you want a sober buddy to vent to!

      • I am a rebel through and through. I have never stayed away for 6 months- but when I do get into these modes where I don’t want to go or take anymore suggestions- my life generally starts looking like a self-sabotaging shit show. But you know- there is a part of being miserable and angry that works for me, this little part of me that enjoys the chaos…sounds kinda twisted right… It’s just not worth it- I got sober to be happy…I was miserable drinking- and even though happiness is not a promise, I know from experience sobriety is the much more attractive option. Just go, you can tell everyone that you don’t want to be there and talk about your frustrations…I get it. Everyone will get it.

    • hey snow, definitely can relate to the feeling. the more days between a meeting, the easier it is to listen to the voice in your head telling you not to go. I almost never feel like going to a meeting, but I always walk away feeling better when I do and those days that I really don’t want to go to the meetings are usually they days I need to be in one and walk away glad I went.

      sending you some virtual solidarity and a hug.