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Laneia has written 915 articles for us.


  1. I wish I could go to a queer gym or swimming pool. The spaces themselves aren’t too bad but I’ve never felt comfortable in changing rooms, even if they have individual cubicles. I always feel alert to the possibility of someone challenging me for being visibally a lesbian or thinking I’m looking at them when I’m not. I hate how much that affects my behaviour there but it’s a protective instinct to make myself as unobtrusive and non-threatening as possible. I have no intention of making anyone else uncomfortable or assaulting them or whatever else cis straight people are afraid we’ll do is why should have to feel so uncomfortable and on my guard all the time? I have so much respect for anyone who’s trans and willingly puts themselves in those spaces because the discomfort of that must be through the roof.

  2. Thank you for that Persian queer dinner series, really right up my ally as a queer Persian in the same city. I think I’ve seen her name around a few times, but it’s cool to see the person behind it.

  3. Read the dog article in bed with my pup cuddled by my side using my arm as a pillow; my roommate across our apartment has her boyfriend over to sleep instead. Guess who routinely is more rested and less stressed?

  4. Lol I don’t know whether I’m mad or pleased that the headline is “It’s Better to Sleep Next to a Dog than a Man, Study Says” but the article only refers to “human partners” vs. dogs and cats. Like, did the article author decide to intentionally throw shade at men with the title even though the study authors used gender-neutral language? Or did the article author just genuinely forget that some women don’t sleep with men?

  5. oh my god i relate so hard to the Gal Pals essay
    “No other novel I have read portrays so well the hurt and confusion caused by women who deliberately elide the difference between friendship and something more, and then pretend those two things are the same. How they make you feel culpable for thinking of them as more than a friend when they think of you as an experiment. How you come to resent their entitlement to retreat back into the straight world, while also wanting to offer solidarity for their suffering at the hands of misogynist men. How the woman who wants to make you the sole bearer of your shared knowledge does this because she has more shame than she can hold”

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