LaCroix. Made in Wisconsin and admired by Midwestern housewives and hip queer women everywhere. Maybe you are both? This is your time to shine, you hip Midwestern queer mama!! It’s fizzy, it comes in over 20 flavors, and it’s basically water! You can get it at your local Whole Foods, and they’re the perfect size to stock in a tote bag or backpack for a long day ahead. Honestly, after a long day in the office, talking to Barb about her weird foot thing and Bill from accounting about his kid’s tee-ball team, nothing is better than cracking open a can, hearing that satisfying fizz, and taking that first big gulp. The people have spoken and they’re saying that they want their water bubbly, readily available, canned, and in 20 flavors! Not only do the people want LaCroix, they want it mixed with booze. They call them: LaCroixtails. Did you ever think your water could do so much?! I didn’t, but frankly, I’m so glad to live in a world where it can.
I’ve scoured the depths of Pinterest to find you some refreshing LaCroixtails to remind you “LaCroixs before Bois” this summer. Grab your gal pals, grab a back porch, grab some booze, and get to drinking! Lastly, many of these cocktails are named things like “lite,” “skinny,” or “slender.” I highly encourage you to ignore those titles and live your best life at whatever size you feel like! LaCroix is for the people and by the people! No sizeism allowed here!
Red Wine Berry Spritzer
Coconut Mojito
Skinny Sparkling Blueberry Mojito
Blackberry Fizz
The Apricot Blossom
Skinny White Wine Spritzer
Sparkling Sundown
Cherry Lime Sparkle Cocktail
Slender Rosemary Grapefruit Fizz
The Razzy
Skinny Piña Colada
Apricot Bellini
Summer Spicy Paloma
The St. Peach-Pear
Kiwi Watermelon Cocktail, Blackberry Cucumber Refresher, and Cantaloupe Ginger Beer Cocktail
Cucumber Refresher Mocktail
The Faux Driver
Peach-Apricot Lillet Blanc Fizz with Cardamom Sugar
La Corixzy
La Piña
Coco Plum Fizz
These all sound amaaaazing.
I recently found a bottle of Bonny Rose Orange Peel Whiskey and fell in love with the package design. Problem was, I know so few flavored whiskey cocktails that I wasn’t sure what to do with it. Decided to mix it with Schweppes Black Cherry sparkling water (I only wish LaCroix did cherry) and a touch of Angostura bitters for Old Fashioned Spritzers – we’ll see how it goes.
Everything about this sounds delightful
My sole knowledge of Lacroix comes from Autostraddle. I basically think it’s Polar, but fancy and for the west coast?
This is my exact impression, too! (Apparently, the West Coast is/was a flavored seltzer wasteland — my former roommate bemoans the fact that she has to order cases of Polar from Amazon because she can’t find any in SoCal.)
Thank you for including a couple mocktails for us non-alcohol drinking folks. Also, I love how inclusive the intro was: you can be a midwestern housewife AND a hip queer person, and no sizeism allowed. This is the reason I love Autostraddle so much, because even the posts about drink recipes are super badass and progressive, and I just want to say how AMAZINGLY refreshing it is to have this safe-space on the internet. I appreciate you! Also, I’ve loved reading everything you’ve written so far, Alaina! You’re a great addition to the team.
Also, I’ve just quit drinking soda this week, and it really really sucks, so thank you for reminding me that La Croix exists.
I just moved to a new town and found a grocery store that sells La Croix for hella cheap. My lady and I love cocktails and we are going to make SO many of these this summer. Viva LaCroixtail!
For those of us who live the broke queer life, I’ve definitely seen cases of LaCroix at Grocery Outlet for hella cheap. Limited flavors and they won’t always have it, but good if you’re too cheap for places like Whole Foods and despise them on principal.
NorCal Margarita.
2oz 100% agave tequila
half a lime, squeezed (so, 1-2T or so of lime juice?)
4-5 oz of either orange or pampelmousse (if you’re fancy)lacroix fizzy H2O
garnish with salt,
serve on ice
You’re welcome.
Also, for people like me who are on a budget, the H.E.B. (if you’re in texas) and Wegmans (if you’re in the promised land) have their own brand of fizzy water that is literally the exact same thing for half the price. Also, Trader Joes has this spindrift seltzer has a grapefruit version that has a little bit of real fruit juice in it (so it has some calories but not a lot) that might be EVEN better in this cocktail than the lacroix.
Additionally, I’ve recently stopped drinking pop this week, and it ridiculously sucks, so thank you for advising me that wine glasses.