Straight people really like the tell it to my balls joke, I think.
“Appear eager. Put effort in. Show up on the first date wearing a t-shirt with a picture of her cat on it. No. Show up wearing a t-shirt with a doctored photo of your cat and her cat, to demonstrate what it might look like if your cats had kittens together.”
“Are we doing this? Is this real?”
“Pump it, crank it, spin it / I’mma get Ani DiFrank for a minute”
“According to me, 80-85% of women are right where I want them: completely astonished at how swiftly and effortlessly I remove their bras.”
Brittani on being sad on twitter, anxiety, being a queer black lesbian in the world, overanalyzing shit to death and basically everything you’ve ever wanted to hear B talk about.
There’s a pretty gay stand-up show happening on Friday at 8pm in Los Angeles.
Talking Pictures is a movie interruption that capitalizes on how awful/awesome queer movies can be. Featuring Hannah Hart, DeAnne Smith, Brittani Nichols and Carly Usdin.
“You’ll never see the color blue THE SAME WAY AGAIN because you’ll be genuinely HIPPOSHIT CRAZY and unable to process primary colors without COLLAPSING INTO A BUCKET OF TEARS.”
As an internationally-acclaimed, world traveling comedian (borderline unemployed vagrant), I know a thing or two about how to live the sweet life on a budget.
I saw a small fraction of this year’s tweets and I don’t follow everyone in the world but I still had my favorites just like everyone else.
This is a gift guide based on DeAnne Smith’s viral video, Nerdy Love Song With Added Kitten Bonus. You’re Welcome
“This is a ridiculous amount of sweat. I know this is hot yoga and everything, but how is there even this much sweat in me? How is this possible? This seems unsafe. Is this normal? Maybe I’m peeing. Am I peeing? How can there be this much sweat in a person? I think it’s pee.”
Tiny Pineapple, you’re so real. Your feelings about dog walks are my feelings about dog walks.
A critter is someone who does things that normal people do in a way cuter than the average person.
I hope next week’s episode involves a girl on a bike, DeAnne Smith. Maybe you could pull some strings?
“Wait, everyone just ignore the bird.”
New episode of Tiny Pineapple went up yesterday, but I was too busy to tell you about it then. I make up for that here, now. Today.
This week DeAnne hit me in the heart space with a segment that consisted of two of the most amazing people on both Mt. Feelings and The World At-Large: DeAnne Smith herself and Marni, the Co-Director of A-Camp and the Face of Canada.
“We set out to make a show wherein the show opening and the credits were much longer than the show itself, and I think we succeeded here.”