NSFW Lesbosexy Sunday Will Melt Your Brain

Welcome to NSFW Sunday!

+ Everyone is obsessed with talking about pubic hair. A recent article in the Telegraph argued that pubic hair is one of the biggest challenges for young women today. Kate Dries argues that it actually might be:

“Her words sound strong – like, really? The biggest challenge for women is about what to do with their pubic hair? What about rape or abortion or the wage gap? What about the truly devastating ways women are treated in countries that aren’t Rickman’s England?

But what Rickman saying is true, because the stuff that seems stupid is actually the stuff that’s harder to unpack. We can slowly legislate our way towards workplace equality or equal pay. What we can’t do in any definitive way is force people to think differently about what women look like. These are the issues that keep holding us back, that infiltrate every aspect of our daily life, that inform the choices we make, that make us think of women differently than we think of men. And sure, these “issues” are so dumb. They feel like frivolous concerns. But the longer we don’t take the perception of how a woman “should” look seriously, the longer it’s going to take for the world to define what we deserve.”

+ Anna Bongiovanni and Kaz Meyer created a sexy queer romantic comic that is relevant to your interests.

+ Your nipples are perfect, and other things you may not know about them.

+ Former Sex Diaries editor Rachel Kramer Bussel spoke to Amanda Hess about reading strangers’ sex lives every week.

+ The Lingerie Lesbian has a roundup of the best bras for small busts.

Photographer Lyra Lopez Kamoku via rodeoh

Photographer Lyra Lopez Kamoku via rodeoh

+ Babeland will show you how sex toys are created.

+ What happens when sex research goes from science to the mainstream media, according to someone whose findings were misrepresented.

+ Oh Joy Sex Toy has a beginner’s guide to solo rope bondage.

+ Over-using Facebook can ruin relationships, says science:

“A study recently conducted by doctoral students Russell Clayton, Alexander Nagurney, and Jessica R. Smith found that participants who had especially high levels of Facebook use experienced higher levels of related conflict, cheating, breakup, and divorce. Researchers said that this was because they were at higher risk of experiencing jealousy induced over previous romantic partners or wall posters, as well as more likely to contact other users in ways that count as ’emotional cheating.’ Interestingly enough, Clayton found that these results were only true for couples that had been in relationship for three years or less, suggesting that Facebook is more of a threat to the ‘I want to know everything about you’ stage of love than the ‘I’ve heard you tell that story a million times already’ phase.”

+ Solopoly writes about the poly closet, and how staying quiet about nonstandard relationship choices can be harmful to everyone:

“Here’s the irony: The very same people who choose to stay in the closet also generally express a strong wish that the risk and stigma of being out about nonstandard relationships would just disappear. Almost to a person, they tell me that they wish the world was a more accepting place. In fact, they’re often quite passionate about this, since closeted people tend to be pretty stressed.

…Tellingly, they usually also mention that more people being visibly out about nonstandard relationships would probably do the most to help realize their dream of a more accepting world.

In other words: they acknowledge that being out would directly benefit people like them, including them. Yet they still choose the closet.”

She also writes about why you only hear about failed open relationships, and why that should change.


All of the photographs on NSFW Sundays are taken from various tumblrs and do not belong to us. All are linked and credited to the best of our abilities in hopes of attracting more traffic to the tumblrs and photographers who have blessed us with this imagery. The inclusion of a photograph here should not be interpreted as an assertion of the model’s gender identity or sexual orientation. If there is a photo included here that belongs to you and you want it removed, please email bren [at] autostraddle dot com and it will be removed promptly, no questions asked.

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Ryan Yates

Ryan Yates was the NSFW Editor (2013–2018) and Literary Editor for Autostraddle.com, with bylines in Nylon, Refinery29, The Toast, Bitch, The Daily Beast, Jezebel, and elsewhere. They live in Los Angeles and also on twitter and instagram.

Ryan has written 1142 articles for us.

15 Comments

  1. “Public” hair is probably my favorite typo of all time. But in all seriousness, I finally decided to stop dealing with the frequent ingrown hairs and prickly triangle and embrace the bush. So far, it’s been 8 months now and I’ve never felt more…feminine. And I love it. I’m figuring out what makes me feel like a femme, but on my own terms, and for me a bush is like a testament to my own sense of womanhood.

    Also, thank you for the link to the best lingerie for small busts. I want my own lingerie collection one day, but that probably won’t happen until I graduate with my master’s and get a Big Girl Job.

  2. When I was a freshman in college, my professor, one of those “raging feminists” my dad warned me about, told me that the only reason I like being all shaved is because of society and how men just want to infantalize women by keeping their vaginas looking like those of little girls’ and I was so traumatized by that that I have NEVER shaved down there again.
    It’s a serious issue! I think people heap a lot of shame on girls who don’t shave, but then people like my professor heap a lot of shame on people who do, and then you have to deal with the itchiness factor and all sorts of other things and what to do if you’re going to sleep with someone new and everything…
    It’s really stressful. Ha.

  3. idk if it’s because I’m secretly 12 years old or what but watching that Limon vibrator causing havoc in the water glass and vibrating the jello made me laugh so hard.

  4. This is a tangent to pubic hair, and not as light hearted as nsfw stuff (mmm, the pics), but I often think about the conflict between how I want to keep my body hair, and professionalism…. in my job I spend a good part of the day outside, not in air conditioning. I could wear capris and short-capped shirts yet it doesn’t feel appropriate and feels like it affects my “image” negatively to let my hair show. I am naturally very hairy and I have super sensitive skin that makes it a nightmare to shave. (I’ve tried all the tricks, really.) How I come across is very important to my job, but I like letting my hair grow. I’m thinking of buying an electric razor just to trim the leg hair so it’s less obvious. It’s just not something I hear discussed. People talk about body hair when it pertains to sex, but there’s not much discussion about how it pertains to career/professionalism. I feel a significant amount of pressure to present in a clear-cut, hairless way for professional reasons despite how it runs counter to what I actually want for myself and what feels good, empowering and sexy for me. gah! Am I alone in this?

    • I’m with you on this. I mean, I’m a grad student, I can wear shorts to school, but do I want to? my legs are super fuzzy. None of my shirts would really show my underarms anyway so that’s a non issue, but will people think I’m weird/take me less seriously if I show my leg fuzz? Like dudes can do it but I don’t know.

  5. When I first came out to my older sister she told me that I needed to get a Brazilian because she used to live with a bunch of lesbians in Seattle (in the 90’s) and apparently they were all hair-free.

    Most uncomfortable conversation I’ve ever had, trying to explain to her that there is no ‘right’ way to have gay body hair.

    • This reminds me so much of my big sis, who is nothing but 100% loving and supportive of me but has known about three other lesbians, as casual acquaintances, her entire life.

      When I referred to myself as queer in front of her once she was like :o “Why would you call yourself something so horrible? There’s nothing wrong with who you are” and looked really upset. And I had to be all “No, no. It’s cool. Because queer theory. Because reclamation.”

      I think she’s actually become more of a protective momma bear to me since our mom is still very slowly adjusting to the whole lesbian daughter thing.

      I think she had a somewhat similar take to your sis on the body hair thing but it was in a much more hilarious “Whatever you’re doing, do it right, cos if you’re sleeping with other girls, they’re gonna notice. Men, not so much.”

  6. Wow, that SoloPoly comment seems kind of closet-shaming. Like, I see her point, but as someone who is out to a handful of friends and my immediate family, but not my coworkers (I am out as queer, but not as poly, and I will say without a doubt I think they would judge me harder for that) and who knows many people in similar half-in-half-out situations, I don’t know that it MATTERS.

    Yes, it’s good for the community. Yes, it’s probably good for us. We’re not stupid. It’s not like the idea of NOT HIDING and reducing stress and perhaps revealing commonalities among friends isn’t appealing by its very nature.

    But that (“it’s just leading to further discrimination”) is the same rhetoric used to pressure queer people of any sort out of the closet, which isn’t exactly acceptable behavior. There aren’t a lot of celebrities (or even ONE that I can think of) or many positive media portrayals of polyamory to point to.

    And sometimes you need to feel safe or keep your job or not set yourself up for your credibility or parenting being challenged or you just don’t have the spoons to be the token non-monogamist explaining how everything works.

    And that’s OKAY, short of it affecting your relationships with your partners/metamours.

    I just really don’t like the tone being used there as if the decision to come out of the closet isn’t one that is a constant struggle for most people making that choice.

  7. When I first read the queer comic, I skimmed it but remember feeling uneasy about some things…then I re-read it just now and pretty much had my uneasiness resurface full-force. :(

    The art might have been nice but the plot was a bit problematic for me. I’m not sure if the comic was supposed to be PWP, but if it was, it wasn’t done properly. Ellie gets pressured into going out late at night into the woods by Corey, where they meet a bunch of radical queer women who then force themselves on Corey. Ellie runs off and Corey follows suit, giving her the “consent” speech (that quite frankly should’ve been said from the beginning of the comic..but then, where would the plot be if not for the suspense and conflict between the protagonists?!) and then they have sex after admitting their feelings for each other (a.k.a the “It’s only special when it’s with you” zombie trope)

    And we then last cut to the “radicals” having stolen their clothes and burning them.

    …I couldn’t get past the strong lack of consent and communication and strong discomfort that resonated throughout the comic and I had to say something because it’s been bugging me forever since I read it.

    That and the metaphorical voyeurism was creepy. At least what positive thing I did get from this is that I know what NOT to do and what to bring if ever I’m interested in a romp in the woods.

    I wanna write a fic about this now.

Comments are closed.