NSFW Lesbosexy Sunday Will Define Sex However She Wants

Welcome to NSFW Sunday!

+ Science has confirmed that we’re all sluts and that maybe we should treat the Western model of monogamy as a model rather than a default setting:

“In many societies today, including our own, women who are overtly sexual and pursue multiple male partners often experience moral outrage and ‘slut shaming’ of a kind that is entirely unheard of in other parts of the world. While these cultural attitudes used to look toward science for justification, that position is becoming increasingly difficult to reconcile with the biological evidence. From Sarah Hrdy’s discoveries among the langurs of Abu to polyamorous meetups in Aberdeen, female sexuality has been revealed to be a far more dynamic area of research than Darwin could have imagined. As Hrdy stated herself in the Annals of the New York Academy of Sciences at the dawn of the 21st century, far from being passive, females are ‘flexible and opportunistic individuals who confront recurring reproductive dilemmas and tradeoffs within a world of shifting options.’ Or, as another observer summarized, ‘It’s our party. We can love who we want.’”

Si Shen via taschkaturnquist

Si Shen via taschkaturnquist

+ Anna Pulley tried out lady mag sex tips with her girlfriend, and the result is required reading. For example, tips concerning earlobe grabbing are ridiculous as they sound:

“Here we learned that, of all the potential extremities to grab onto during girl-on-top sex, clutching onto your lover’s earlobes is the second least ergonomically feasible (the first being the toes). There’s nothing particularly gripping about the earlobe—it’s a quarter-inch of cartilage, after all, not a climbing wall. And, though it’s possible this tip would work better if your arms were longer or you were into ear masochism generally, I found my girlfriend’s earlobes to be just out of reach, causing me to have to hunch forward in a sad parenthesis while riding her. Also, rocking at anything more than a gentle grind caused my fingers to slip off and her to complain of mild, yet annoying pain.”

+ More women report having same-sex sexual experiences these days, but no one is sure why:

“Roughly 18 percent reported getting sexual with a woman without going downtown, compared to the 8 percent that did venture there. But it’s hard to arrive at any conclusions about this without knowing more about the nature of these non-genital same-sex behaviors: Was it a make-out in front of hooting men at a bar or an intimate rendezvous under the sheets? How many of these women were acting on an attraction to women? How many were acting on an attraction to a particular person who happened to be a woman? How many were ceding to peer pressure? How many were performing for men? How many were simply experimenting for experimenting’s sake? We don’t know.

Sex research reveals us to ourselves ever so gradually. This study is one more piece to the puzzle, but who knows just where it goes.”

+ At the Hairpin, Lindsay King-Miller answers questions about poly break ups, bringing your girlfriend along when you’re hanging out with your friends, family transphobia and defining sex however you want:

“It is, indeed, ridiculous that we as a society have come to define ‘sex’ as penis-in-vagina, while all other sex acts are relegated to foreplay—and the number one thing we can do about this insidious misinformation is simply ignore it. If you don’t like to be penetrated, there’s no reason you shouldn’t be able to have a happy, healthy, and satisfying sex life enjoying all of the numerous exciting things naked people can do to and with one another.”

+ Dusk, a 24/7 porn channel for women popular in the Netherlands, is set to launch in the US next year. The channel’s content is chosen by an open panel of about 2,000 women who so far have tended to “look for extensive foreplay, nice scenery, good lighting and camera work, and sex that is explicit without being overly rough.” Though the audience is primarily straight, “when Dusk does air lesbian films, the channel still adheres to its audience preferences, which are basically the same for heterosexual and lesbian sex: no fake-looking scenes that were clearly created for the enjoyment of men.”

+ In Send Me Your Sexts, filmmaker Eileen Yaghoobian creates short films out of your sexts and puts them on YouTube for posterity.

+ This gallery of Sexology covers from the 1960s is an interesting look at what people used to talk about when they talked about sex.

photo by Taschka Turnquist via taschkaturnquist

photo by Taschka Turnquist via taschkaturnquist

+ Manil Suri has won the Bad Sex Award for 2013. His entry features unnecessarily arty alliteration; comparisons of all activity partners involved to superheroes, suns, and solar systems; and the use of the phrase “atomic nuclei.”

+ We braved the industrial glory of a vintage vibrator for you —  it’s called The Handy Hannah Vitolator, and it was designed, allegedly, to be a “scalp massager.”

+ If you’re the color of vegetables, people find you more attractive.

+ The always delightful Funky Brown Chick answers the question Where Can I Find Classy Porn in Metro:

Smut has come a long way, baby! Somewhat less likely to be yucky, racist or sexist, feminist porn hit mainstream stride with Cindy Gallop’s ”Make Love Not Porn,” The Good For Her Feminist Porn Awards, Autostraddle’s excellent queer porn list and Violet’s Blue Smart Porn collection providing good jumping off points. I call “Rule 34” on class and intelligence.

+ The MUA box, a sex toy storage solution, is the first sex-toy-related product to be allowed on Kickstarter:

“If adult companies continue to be restricted from crowdfunding platforms, they’ll continue to limit their reach and diminish the open conversation surrounding sex products.

Which is why Bonilla’s accomplishment may be one small step for man, but one giant leap for the sex toys industry. Because the MUA box isn’t actually a sex toy, it can slip past the seemingly restrictive guidelines of Kickstarter while simultaneously cracking the door open and paving the way for future erotic products. For many, including Bonilla herself, this accomplishment is a sure-fire sign that society is becoming more sex-positive and that the corporate world is beginning to accept sex toys as business as usual.”

+ Have you ordered your 2014 Autostraddle Calendar yet? You really should. It’s a great way to support Autostraddle, celebrate diverse queer visibility and keep yourself smiling all the live-long year!

miss_april_02

Miss April via Autostraddle Store


All of the photographs on NSFW Sundays are taken from various tumblrs and do not belong to us. All are linked and credited to the best of our abilities in hopes of attracting more traffic to the tumblrs and photographers who have blessed us with this imagery. The inclusion of a photograph here should not be interpreted as an assertion of the model’s gender identity or sexual orientation. If there is a photo included here that belongs to you and you want it removed, please email bren [at] autostraddle dot com and it will be removed promptly, no questions asked.

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24 Comments

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    “If you’re the color of vegetables, people find you more attractive.”

    …………………starts vigorously rubbing carrots on my face

    …..what. it’s either that or blush all the time, & that blood has somewhere to be

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      very late alsos:

      -the “where can i find classy porn” made me sad because it brought up good, sad points about being lonely & wanting hugs (& how that can manifest as “oh, no, i just want sex”). it’s kind of comforting to see someone say “Don’t feel guilty, dirty or ashamed if you crave more physicality in general.”

      -the cosmo sex tip article gave me a sorely needed giggle. who writes this stuff? it sounds like really, really bad fanfiction. (also, Obama. the audacity to hope i can’t)

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    Also I started reading the Anna Pulley article. My wife came into the room to check on me- she couldn’t tell if I was laughing or crying. So then I had to read it out loud to her with both of us laughing. What a belly workout! Thanks for sharing the link!

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    I’m glad Anna Pulley took one for the team to inform us about the legitimacy of Cosmo sex tips. I never understood them when my friends in high school read Cosmo but I also assumed they were straight people things…

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