• ThumbnailWelcome to the sixth recap of the second season of Faking It, an operetta about lesbian love and home decor brought to you by the same network that brought you Is She Really Going Out With Him?

    We open in […]

    • “Have you ever heard of Jodi Lerner? Your work is just so reminiscent of her mixed-media sculpture-related explorations, I truly believe you’d have so much to learn from each other.”

      Ha ha ha ha ha!!!!

      This show though. Thank god for Lauren. I’m still going to complain that it’s taking til episode 7 of the second season to get Amy some…[Read more]

    • Literally, almost every episode I cry for Amy’s life except this one. It’s a nice change to see Amy finally “meet” Reagan. Damn, she’s hot.
      And cheers for Lauren.

    • Hands down Lauren was the best part of this episode. A-dorable.

    • MAKE OUT AT LAST!!!! (almost…)

    • My predictions for next episode:
      – Karma will see Amy & Reagan together and realize how shallow her relationship with Liam is.
      – Karma will be jealous of Amy’s affection for Reagan.
      – Karma will vie with Reagan for Amy’s attention. She’ll attempt to show how much better she is for Amy with things like the epi-pen.
      – Liam will be jealous of…[Read more]

    • YES!
      I can’t process anything else about this episode other than Lauren’s outfit in the beginning of the party reminds me of Sherilyn Fenn in Two Moon Junction.

    • Lauren on ecstasy is my favourite kind of TV.

    • A+ grey gardens reference

    • Lauren is definitely my fave. Also I’m sooooo not here for Liam and Karma taking up screen time. Show, you promised us gay. Bring us gay.

    • I somehow missed the promo clip of Fifth Harmony so when the first notes of “The Right Stuff” started I flailed so hard I almost dropped my laptop on the floor. Then I realized that these kids would not have even been born yet when that song came out, like not nearly. And NKOTB is officially vintage now, I guess? I am so old.

      Also: Amy is 16,…[Read more]

      • On another site someone looked this up. Texas has a Romeo/Juliet law that allows people within three years of each other to have a sexual/romantic relationship.

        • Thanks for the info! I can now rest easy that two fictional characters can legally date each other. ;)

        • Unfortunately I think that only applies to opposite-gender couples; Texas specifically has a stipulation that the two people cannot be prohibited from marrying each other in order for the Romeo/Juliet defense to apply, and gay marriage is banned in Texas. Probably not for very long – you know it’s only a matter of time – but as of right now, a…[Read more]

          • Knowing Covington he’s totally going to use it for “groundbreaking” finale.

      • I feel differently about the age thing when it’s between two women, honestly? maybe because i know a lot of people who had relationships with women over 18 when they were under 18… but also i knew a lot of 16-year-old girls with 18 or 19-year-old boyfriends when i was in high school, too, and nobody found it odd. i thought 16 was the age of…[Read more]

    • Lauren is amazing!!!! I really want to know what Theo’s deal is. He has a secret and I can’t wait to find out what it is.

      Also I can’t wait for more Reamy! *sigh* your first real girl hook up who is a person who is also really attracted to girls and not just messing with your head. It’s a beautiful thing.

    • Once I was out with this girl I had a girl crush on and we went to the second hand music store to thrift some never-heard-of-indie albums.

      At some point she was digging some synth-alternative-pop-new-age band and she said : “Here try!” and she put the headphones on my head.

      Forget nipple clips, I have a headphones fetish.

    • “here now you’ll never have to hear a man speak ever again”

    • I’m really trying to understand why there was no post with cats and kittens in tiny costumes for National Cat Day…I’m a little disappointed and don’t know where else to air my grievances :)

    • So Rita is oficially bactracking now from her words that Amy is lesbian which is something she and Covington talked about and they “don’t want people to feel like they can relate to this vulnerable process that she’s going through, and they can relate to this girl because she’s a lesbian and then have that taken away, like, “Oh, never mind, you…[Read more]

      • I agree. A show that pretends to positively portray queer teenagers can’t have a truly gay female character… :/

        • Whoa, back up. Did you mean to say that the only people who are “truly gay” are those who never HD sex with the opposite gender?

          (I mean, I’m also sick as shit of the “lesbian sleeps with a dude” storyline… But yeahhh.)

    • There are so many screencaps in this recap that I would class as Junior Mint Imperative (JMI), yet no mention. What do these poor kids have to do to get someone to chuck a miniature, chocolate-enveloped mint treat into their mouths?

    • soo random observation:

      Lauren seems to have the same shitty attitude she always has had, but now it’s cool and awesome because she’s intersex?


      • It’s cool and awesome because she’s got great comedic timing and is genuinely a funny character. I don’t think people are suddenly seeing her as some kind of perfect being – she’s got depth now, and she’s funny as hell as the “complicated antagonist”.

        • Bailey the best actor on the show by a long shot. I know that’s what I respond to – you’re right that her comedic timing is great. I also thinking viewers enjoy ‘mean’ jokes. That’s why so many people also love Shane just as much, and he’s done/said plenty of crap too.

    • This episode made me outraged because it was a Friday night and Amy said she still had time to catch Colbert. COLBERT IS ON MONDAYS-THURSDAYS.

      It’s like MTV doesn’t have a fact checker. HOW DARE THEY.

      My boycott starts right now.

    • ‘When I had my first boyfriend it was more like I got my first car and I knew it was a stick when I got it and I can’t drive stick but I got it anyway and then was like, damn, I can only go like ten feet in this car.’

      This comment made my whole week. Thank you :)

  • HELLO and welcome to the 150th installment of Things I Read That I Love, wherein I share with you some of the longer-form journalism/essays I’ve read recently so that you can read them too and we can all know more […]

    • Um, so, everything about the, “nipster,” movement is mildly (to wildly) terrifying. For serious, yikes. Yikes all around.

      Also kind of a different note, but I’m SUPER bummed that Total Nightmare Neo Nazi Guy Number One has a sidekick who goes by Vendetta whilst wearing a Guy Fawkes mask.
      Because roses.

    • Isn’t it scary to think about the possibility that they find out how to stop ageing…but when our generation (whatever your generation is) is, say, 70. So we have aged, as naturally as one does by, say 2085. But the people younger than us have stopped. So there’s this dying breed of the last generation of proper wrinkly oldish people! And maybe…[Read more]

      • haha you don’t think they would have applied this thing to the old people too? so they’ll be perpetually 70? not that aging will be eradicated, i’m sure cost will come into it :/

    • any time an economy struggles, i find, the citizens will become intolerant and divisive. Once i finish my bachelors i hope to get my masters in Germany. Its free education is an incredibly attractive deal. But if the economy continues its fluctuation, i predict these “nipster nazis” gaining even more members. As a gay African, needless to say, its…[Read more]

    • I don’t think I could tolerate listening to the radio for more than 10 minutes at a time if Nicki Minaj didn’t exist

  • ThumbnailHello Autostraddle! As you may have noticed, the human once known as Intern Grace is becoming a comic book star and therefore is unable to continue being my third arm / forever companion. So I need a new personal […]

    • Stef replied 1 week ago

      you beautiful horrible genius

    • Casey replied 1 week ago

      If I were better at photoshop, I would totally apply to be your Intern Case. But alas… I hope you find someone amazing!

    • Those are some pretty big shoes to fill.


      It’s still a thing to claim 2ndcommenthood right?

    • In my next life, maybe, just maybe…

    • So tempted to quit the Autostraddle job I already have so I can apply to bring you dry cereal and ice water when you’re sick in bed

    • I want to see the results of all of these applications omg

    • Sally replied 1 week ago

      Can we submit fake applications just so we can do the photoshop/card challenges?

      • Stef replied 1 week ago

        like, you could still send me a birthday card if you want, it’s in 3 weeks, i’m gonna be real old

    • Anna replied 1 week ago

      Is this an on-location internship or an online one? i.e is this only open for applicants in the bay area?

      • Riese replied 1 week ago

        online! i’m probably leaving the bay area within a year anyhow. of course, anybody willing to live in a hypothetical cottage in my backyard for the rest of my life with photoshop always open on your laptop regardless of where I live would have a leg up over the competition

    • If only I had time.

    • I’m already jealous of whoever will get this job, good luck to everyone! if only english was my first language I’d definitely would apply.

    • Ohmygod if I had any skills at all I would be all over this. But alas, earwax.

      Ps totally unrelated but I don’t know where else to post this, I FOUND A PUPPY!

    • Not for me, but is there a location requirement? It doesn’t say in the post, unless there’s a list of requirements that includes location/relocation that I didn’t see…

      • Riese replied 1 week ago

        You have to be in the US since so much of the job involves US television and communicating with me when I’m working, but that’s it!

    • Juliet replied 1 week ago

      Well, I’m good at interning. And interneting. And especially lesbian interneting. And Knowing What The Kids Are Into These Days. And I can be clever and dependable. I’m good at research, and doing jobs that are odd in any sense of the word. But curse you, universe, for making my grandmother the technology know-it-all of the family. I couldn’t…[Read more]

    • Tango replied 1 week ago

      no. nonono. No. No, I JUST had a dream about this two nights ago. Stop. Like, I even made a little post about it on tumblr. I need a moment to mull this over…

    • Beth replied 1 week ago

      Why is the internet not exploding more right now.

      • jane replied 1 week ago

        I am having a quiet, personal explosion about this

    • Sadly I am only good at MS Paint

      • Riese replied 1 week ago

        wait how did you get your hands on a copy of MS Paint

    • Geez I didn’t realize Grace had to do a lot! I give her props

    • So I am so absolutely perfect for this job it kills me. My only downfall being location. I am, however, going to submit such a beautiful application that our time difference will be the smallest of problems and, actually, you’ll wonder why you never hired a world-travelling intern before…

    • Your well-intentioned mention that you believe you should be paying your interns does nothing to the grossly unethical practice you have here of essentially requiring someone to work full time (someone skilled, qualified, to do a lot of assistant duties) is not only illegal, it’s disappointing when you consider the massive wage disparity between…[Read more]

      • Mary replied 1 week ago

        I just started learning photoshop this semester :-/. I’ve been wondering when there would be an opportunity like this but perhaps next go around.

      • I think holding a fundraiser is a great idea. I don’t blame Autostraddle for not having the money to pay currently, but I feel like this site should at least make a good faith effor to raise some money for that purpose before declaring it impossible. I know a lot of readers would be willing to make a contribution towards a fund for interns. I know…[Read more]

        • Riese replied 1 week ago

          We’ve actually made every effort we know how to make to raise enough money to pay our employees fairly! In addition to writing this site and managing its community, we sell merchandise, run events, solicit donations passionately (there’s a donate button in the sidebar) and recently launched a membership program. We’ve busted our ass to make all…[Read more]

          • I get it, and my comment wasn’t meant as criticism. I should clarify that I disagree with Carolne that unpaid internships are inherently unethical. Some places just don’t have the money and I don’t think it’s necessarily preferable to withhold the opportunity from everyone when there are people who would jump at the chance to work for free.…[Read more]

          • Riese replied 1 week ago

            i see what you’re saying! let me do my best to explain how this works for us and why things might not be as they appear: the difference between other organizations that don’t pay interns and us is that they’re able to pay everybody except the interns. we’re still not able to pay everybody who contributes to this community. there are so many people…[Read more]

          • Abby replied 1 week ago

            comparing autostraddle to a “Wall Street mortgage fraud” is like comparing ice cream to a pyramid scheme

            check your facts
            girl, boo

          • I thought internships were about gaining experience in that career field. Cause im not sure if my internship is paid or not but I don’t mind gaining experience

      • Caroline is right;


        I’ve held 3 unpaid internships during and since college and I no longer believe they’re ok.. They’re unethical in the most hidden, subversive way. Among other reasons, the existence of entry level jobs for creative professions tend to be replaced with intern labor. Unpaid…[Read more]

        • They are illegal when they are put in place of paying jobs or asking for unpaid work now to guarantee a paying position in the future, but this is an unpaid intern filling in the role of another unpaid intern. I think it was clear that if there is no unpaid intern, the job doesn’t go to someone for money, it just doesn’t happen. And she also made…[Read more]

        • “Despite good intentions, and surrounding financial issues, Autostraddle should do better…”

          but how can we? like there is no actual way to do better because of the financial issues. it’s so much easier said than done. this stuff is so hard for me because i seriously want to pay EVERYONE. i want that more than anything in the entire world.…[Read more]

          • “we get lots of emails from readers who want to help out — i’ve had ppl wanting to screencap for me for the last 7 years. they love the site & community and want to be involved, even if we can’t afford to pay them”

            I just wanted to throw one perspective in there to back this up. I am an unpaid autostraddle intern. I agree with the general…[Read more]

      • Y’all. Family. Stars in my sky. I am sad. A few months ago, we announced A+, our big community-based initiative to make the site financially sustainable so we could do things like pay people justly for their work. We soon found out we were evil capitalists for creating a program that might exclude some people based on inability to pay. This week,…[Read more]


        Some general responses to the justifications given for this unethical internship:

        -This is a violation of the USA’s DOL labor guidelines which Marilee listed below. Corressponding with the numbered guidelines: 1+2) Unpaid internships are supposed to be learning experiences. They are legally intended to be…[Read more]

    • Mary replied 1 week ago

      I want to be your intern Riese but the only things I would do are bring you dry cereal, talk to you incessantly about Pretty Little Liars, and copyedit. Is that acceptable? One out of the three of those is an actual skill…

      Also I can’t show anyone my twitter, all I tweet about is whiskey and quesadillas. Social media is hard.

      Good luck on…[Read more]


      But I’m Canada.. Which is like TOUCHING the US.. So like? Yes? No? Maybe so? Probs not

      • I think you just have to be in a similar time zone and access American pop culture. I think Canada mostly fits that bill.

    • Andrea replied 1 week ago

      I think I need to spend all of my free time from here on out learning on how to use the internet/computer/Photoshop so that I can apply next time this life-changing opportunity comes along

    • Ooh! Is there like an age…thing?

    • I want to do this so hard! I have the time! I have the abilities! I am submitting my application materials almost right now!

    • Lex replied 1 week ago

      There’s this girl in my program who from what I can tell could likely fill all the tech just I dunno about rest. She’s gay and just walked up to me the day y’all covered the Samira/Lauren story which I was reading to say hi and stuff out of the blue. It was adorable and awkward. SamLairen is a queer lady homing beacon I tells ya.

      We have a…[Read more]

    • look i know you don’t want canadians applying, but we have the same time zones and some of us are super amazing at photoshop.

      i mean, i’m not one of them, but surely at least one canadian has figured out the clone stamp.

    • Recently I have become a pro at unpaid interning and like I only sort of know what I want to do when I grow up but I DO know that I love AS/interning so… I’m excited to apply!!

    • Ally replied 6 days ago

      Two questions
      1. Do you want a resume with that lovely cover letter?
      2. What is the general time frame that one gets to make said quote graphics?

      • 1. if you wanna send me one, absolutely! you can also just talk about your relevant experience in the cover letter, but it’s your call.
        2. whenever you have time!

    • I LIVE IN AUSTRALIA BUT I’M PERFECT except for having no time due to having a one year old.


    • We have until midnight PST to submit everything?

    • crossing fingers forever

    • Oh man when will we find out who you picked?

  • ThumbnailWelcome to the fifth recap of the second season of Faking It, a home makeover show from the network that brought you Sucker Free on MTV.

    We open in the open-minded oasis of Hester High, where Karma’s […]

    • I loved the abuse of Amazing Amy references in this recap… Did someone just watch Gone Girl?

      And yes, this may all look nice from the outside, but I can feel it being a ticking clock from the inside. That mid-season trailer didn’t help either!!

      • Haha no, I haven’t seen the movie yet! But I have read the book and I mean, a scavenger hunt run by Amy? THE PARALLELS ABOUND

        • I know! Kept thinking the same thing while watching the episode!

          I avoided the book to keep the first time twist experience as clean as possible… but I read her Dark Places, so I trust this woman.

    • I would like to say if I put that much effort into my bffs birthday and she treated me like Karma did to Amy I would be pissed. We would no longer be friends after that!

      On another note is the DJ from the preview hot waitress chick from Liam’s parents party? I hope so! There definitely needs to be more of her.

      • YES yes it is

        • I can’t like this revelation enough.

          As someone who owns no TV and wouldn’t watch TV even if someone gave me one, I live through your recaps.

          Don’t ask. I’d rather read the adventure while staring at poor quality screencaps than live the full experience on a large HD screen.

      • Vee replied 1 week ago

        Yeah, Karma could have acted way nicer, but Amy’s behaviour was not nice either? If she’d just let Karma read Liam’s card, the whole day would have been a lot more enjoyable for the both of them.
        Fingers crossed for some Reagan(?)/Amy action in the next few episodes.

    • Did you guys see the mid-season trailer? It looks good! (at least better than these last few episodes..)

      Also, I vote for sending away Karma and Liam and keep Hot Duke and HOT WAITRESS.

      • That trailer does look promising. I just hope that the second half actually delivers some women loving/focused action because I’m a bit sick of waiting for this show to deliver queer women action – we’ve had all angst with none of the fun.

      • I second getting rid of Karma and Liam and keeping HOT Duke and HOT waitress chick!

      • Amelia replied 1 week ago

        TBH it looks like shameless Karmy fans baiting – that ending scene which looks like Karma just ate Amy, which most likely is from two different scenes and if not – it could mean Amy fantasizes about Karma while having sex with Regan (the same pillow as when they kissed), which would insinuate that she can enjoy sex with men on its own, but she can…[Read more]

    • Karma was monumentally frustrating. And Amy made me cry with her “if you love something set it free” speech. Gah, this show. I did like that Amy’s mum at least tried to acknowledge her, and also Lauren is increasingly wonderful.

      • yes i feel like farrah is softening and lauren is really growing on me, maybe because she’s getting more and more vulnerable and rounded out

    • Dude, the last few episodes of Faking It have been soooo dead. Nothing has happened! Shit, Shane has gotten so much gay action. And, none for Amy. That’s why Lauren is my favorite right now. I love her facial expressions and her HBIC attitude and also her frenemyship with Shane. I was sad for her in this episode. :(

    • Oh jeez what is Theo’s deal gonna be I hope it’s not super random/actually makes sense/is a logical reason for someone to run away from a makeout. There are so few reasons to run away from a makeout.

    • Oh Shane you sweet summerchild you didn’t know that MMA is just kinky, kinky soft core porn with no kissing.

      I’m loving Lauren’s ponytail.

      But the hell was with this birthday party thing? Where’s Reagan?

    • Wait, is that actually what happened at the end of the episode??? The video suddenly flickered while I was watching it online with my sis, so we jumped from abs guy leaning in to Shane’s face in the final shot. We just assumed they kissed and then abs guy left. I’m glad I didn’t witness the full scene with my sister.

      • I didn’t even get to see the Lauren and Theo kiss nor did i get
        to see Amy give Karma that necklace, or the MMA guy and Shane
        in the Alley. I was watching the regular way on Mtv @ 9:30 CST.

    • “I think I know why but that’s only ’cause I already read like three pages of the finale script so I’m gonna keep it to myself.”


    • Hat replied 1 week ago

      So last night I had the option of Faking it series 1 on British MTV or Wentworth…So I picked Wentworth…because I can read the Faking it recaps here and based on the comments they’re funnier than the actual show…and because Frankie.


      Man this show can be so bad and yet I love it so much. And that mid-season trailer. Yoh….

    • Can we pleaseeeeeeee hurry up and get to the Reamy lovin????
      I love Karmy but I’m ready to see Amy get into a real
      realationship with a women who really wants to be with her, and
      that sexy Reagan is the one. Finally some real girl on girl
      kissing scenes, and not that peck on the lip crap that Karmy
      engages in.

  • ThumbnailLetter From Your Editors
    Hello Autostraddle Plus members!

    Welcome to the fourth edition of the Insider Newsletter, brought to you by the Senior Staff of Autostraddle.com, your #1 source for tips on canning and […]

    • For the record, there really are multiple lesbian-owned organic farms in the greater Missoula area. I keep hinting about adoption at the farmers market, but no takers. I studied botany for chissakes, I’m a practical choice.

      Okay, I’ll read the rest now, I just got excited.

      • One of the Missoula lesbian farmers tried to convince me to come do U-Pick on her farm but I was too scared to go by myself — Alanna we should go!

        ALSO this was great, I’m super excited about the new editors and recamps and things.

      • Oh Missoula was not an incidental selection, it was with great consciousness that I selected it to serve in this manner

        • I should really know better than to question the mindfulness of an incantation that sticks its landing with a Rent reference.

          But enthusiasm makes me painfully earnest.


      I mean, I have no idea what year it is or anything. But That Body Work.

    • I just want y’all to know that I was running early for work and then I saw this post and now I am running late for work.

      But I have a new desktop background thanks to that lip sync collage situation! So, worth it. xo

    • It is so great to get these insiders. As a columnist who’s thousands of miles away and doesn’t know you guys (yet!) I only had a part of an inkling of what you guys go through every single day to deliver this awesome website… it’s insane. And the chaos of transition…don’t get me started on that. I’ve witnessed strong organisations (like…[Read more]

    • “dear priority contact box, i was wondering if y’all had ever considered publishing a motherhood/should i have kids team roundtable? i feel like it is something i desperately need to hear some queer feelings about and sadly i know no queers in real life and i recently turned thirty and my queer heart is having some really complicated feelings re:…[Read more]

      • Beth replied 1 week ago

        I would 100% be into this too. There’s a lack of parenting stuff on here – this would be amazing to include. Em and I are looking for a sperm donor right now, it…an interesting process. Two failed attempts at approaching friends, one nice-but-not-nice-enough experience with someone from the internet, an email out to everyone we know to ask for…[Read more]

        • Err… and also people who are not starting but have been doing this shit for years of course!!!

          Basically it’s a yes vote for queer parenting column/series/posts whatevers.

    • Though I’m hella pumped for the recamps whenever they happen, I just want y’all to know that it’s ok by me that they’re taking a while… I can’t wait to read about everyone’s camp experience, but for me the best recamps are reading over my camp journal and exchanging letters & texts with my cabinbabes <3

      • Yeah me too. Pumped for recamps. I guess it will remind me of how much I miss October camp.
        Also, Cee you were my counsellor. C’mon, send your stuff please.

    • The Insider is my favour it part of the Autrostraddle Plus membership.
      So excited for Heather’s recaps of The Fosters

    • do you ever do the thing where something makes really happy but also the things that are making you happy are bittersweet and you want to help make it more sweet than bitter but you don’t know how so then you just sort of laugh-sob while trying to think of something eloquent and then go eat a sandwich

      Just me, then.

      Seriously though, I…[Read more]

      • Naw that totally happens to other people beside you but totally not me I am way emotionally stable yeah totally yep yes

      • Beth replied 1 week ago

        I couldn’t have put it better xx

    • *still unreasonably excited because Heather Hogan*

    • I’m so happy. :)

    • It’s always a relief to have read all the posts Rachel can’t believe you didn’t read last month because how could anyone deal with Rachel being disappointed in them?

    • Rachel wins the funniest fucking person ever this month. Good god, I was snorting at some of her email exchanges.

    • oh man, so much pressure to fill the Yvonne Saves The Day feature for next issue!

    • Heather Heather Heather oh my god Heather, we have to talk about the ciders at Queens Kickshaw. I live down the street! I’ve only tried one sandwich there and was not blown away, but their ciders are ridiculously fantastic and unique.

    • Can I just nominate Cee, Taylor, Alley and I to do some Portland Food Truck field research? I can think of at least half a dozen really hot extremely talented queer food truck owners/workers.

      I am basically already doing this research in an attempt to find dates so…

    • I laugh everytime I see a question of mine pop up in these posts. *chuckles*

      Ive been looking forward to re camps. Im still sad about the break up. You can tell i am because I cant type the names. And I feel like I shouldve said something the first time it was said. But hey if it makes you happy it cant be that bad.

      I always love seeing how…[Read more]

    • “Problematic Merchandise Package” sounds perfect, especially testimonials from offended people. I knew y’all were going to get shit for the Misandry shirts but I’m so glad they exist, I straight up cackled when I saw the merch post about them.

      • jane replied 1 week ago

        For real, the Misandry shirt is honestly the only thing on my christmas list right now.

      • I would kill for a misandrist shirt with actual offended testimonials on the back!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    • Jo replied 1 week ago

      Wait, is “Get Baked with Autostraddle” not all about baking with weed? That is SO SAD. I’ve never read it because I don’t bake or, it seems, have any desire to bake. But I was super happy that a weed baking series existed here.

    • Erin replied 1 week ago

      “i feel like that’s a way more revealing question than if someone is butch or femme
      are you Robin Hood or Maid Marian
      or, alternatively, a Little John”

      YES. This is actually very telling information.

      • Riese replied 1 week ago

        rachel and laneia were gonna write a longer piece on this topic but have yet to do so WOULDN’T IT BE SO NICE IF THEY DID

    • The problematic merchandise package and the Do I Want Kids? Roundtable, yes please!

    • I can’t wait to see motherhood stuff here! I’m baby planning right now but I’m feeling like I’m going at it alone because it’s so hard to find stuff by young queers on parenting.

      • Riese replied 1 week ago

        i know, right? we definitely need to have more of that stuff.

      • Hi! My wife and I belong to a Facebook group for lesbian/queer moms (or people trying to become moms). If you want I can get you the link.

        Also I’m not sure how to message someone on here but if you want to chat I am totally up for it. We have 2 daughters and I feel like I am young-ish, lol.

        • Yes on baby/parenting stuff. My wife and I went for our first IUI on Saturday! We used her gametes from before she transitioned. The whole journey is so strange.

    • BTW if y’all haven’t checked out the Tambot website do, it has the best cranky ad copy. (I’m a Divacup user or I’d subscribe based on that alone.)

    • I made all of you (rachel) a spotify playlist, it is called “we can’t stop here, this is misandrist country,” you’re welcome!

    • ALSO I want to say that Heather Hogan’s Skins recaps were all I lived for in the months after getting dumped by my first girlfriend and her paragraph about being more than just a girl who likes “tits and fanny” and containing multitudes is still one of my life mantras.

      So. Really happy about this.

    • Oh hey, my friends and I (all queer women) were just talking last night about the Queer Uniform expectations and how we all feel super policed by it. I’d love to see an updated version of that article if you’re working on it.

    • Autostraddle + Heather Hogan = match made in heaven. Can’t even deal with this beyond amazing news.

    • Whoops, I’m a week late reading stuff. Haha
      Thanks Riese for answering my comment about camp. I didn’t understand the extent of the situation.. & I can relate entirely to feeling incapacitated after a breakup. I apologize if my comment seemed strongly worded, I was feeling slightly disappointed and wanted to know what was up. I probably seem like…[Read more]

  • HELLO and welcome to the 149th installment of Things I Read That I Love, wherein I share with you some of the longer-form journalism/essays I’ve read recently so that you can read them too and we can all know more […]

    • The Forsaken: A Rising Number of Homeless Gay Teens Are Being Cast Out By Religious Families

      Thank you for making me read this!

    • “It’s a survival thing. In America, we lose six queer kids a day to the street. That’s every four hours a queer kid dies, whether it be from freezing to death or getting the shit beat out of them or a drug overdose. This is our next real plague.”

      what agonizing statistics

    • The article about LGBT youth homelessness broke my heart, and made me angry, and now I feel powerless … I wonder what the stats are in other western countries, the UK for example. Probably similar, unfortunately.

      Anyway, thanks for making me read it.

      (Also, the article about the Chilean miners was very good! They really did show…[Read more]

    • I look forward to this feature every week! Now that we have largely succeeded on marriage equality, we should turn our resources to the homeless queer youth problem. Too bad it can’t be fixed by court orders.

  • Last week as I was smashing together two triumphant videos for A+ (a membership program we invented in hopes of creating a sustainable income source that’ll save us from having to shut down next year), I began […]

    • Reading this made me realise that I think I lurked here for 4 years before finally making an account?!
      Also, Alex doing Call Your Girlfriend will forever be my favourite.

    • The Real L Word parody NEVER gets old for me. Julie Goldman as Ilene Chaiken is brilliance and magic and perfection.

    • Just FYI i have a vid of Alex doing call your girlfriend at acamp 5.0 Lol. I miss tiny pineapple. Bring it back pretty please?

    • Tracy replied 2 weeks ago

      If you guys only posted videos of Alex dancing from now on, I would totally be okay with that.

    • jane replied 2 weeks ago

      One time I got broken up with and watched every video on the autostraddle youtube channel and this reminds me of that except I’m laughing instead of crying so that’s a plus

    • “…we might as well get married at k-mart” has me in tears

    • Excellent list, excellent videos, excellent humans.

    • And it’s get better to watch these videos, I wish that I’ve knew this website for a long time, but as they’re saying better to be late than never.

    • Hahaha these are amazing. I could watch behind the scenes footage/consume Team Autostraddle communications all day.

    • “I’m gonna have triplets and I’m gonna name them Brooke, River, and Stream and then we’ll see which one succeeds.”
      This is something that periodically pops into my head and I have to just stop and appreciate it for a minute.

    • The “Bad Romance” video was so hilarious!!! Riese’s insanely amazing dance moves made me happy just watching her dance with fun abandon! Thanks!

    • the words with girl episode is pretty much instant win…plus alex dancing…obviously. :)

  • ThumbnailWelcome to the fourth episode of the second season of Faking It, a claymation program from the network that brought you Snooki & JWoww.

    We open on another resplendent Austin afternoon, where my Mom’s […]

    • Why did they put her in a closet with a very attractive girl and have her not even respond at all?
      Seriously, she had to go talk to Liam?
      I just think this show is pretty ridiculous. Faking It does have some social responsibility to not gaybait, and to portray queer characters as actually queer because of its audience in my opinion.
      They show…[Read more]

      • Last episode, she responded the same to the boy and the girl. I don’t like that she’s bi and not a lesbian, but I don’t expect her to flirt with every girl that flirts with her and it seemed to me that she did notice her, but was otherwise distracted.

      • Totally agree that the Karma thing feels forced, but maybe that’s just wishful thinking because I’m so totally over it but high school Amy isn’t?

        She seemed to have really great chemistry with Reagan for the, like, 10 seconds they were on screen together and then I swear I have no idea what Reagan said that made Amy be like, “That’s a great…[Read more]

        • I think it was when Reagan referred to the party as a “soap opera,” and Amy became inspired to make a scene (ie the comment about winning a daytime emmy)

    • Are you serious? Do you really have no sympathy for Liam’s character that all you see is that he spilled a secret. For one I absolutely believe it’s a secret he’s able to tell and shouldn’t have been burdened to keep as the child in the first place. The pressure and the way his family treats him is abhorrent. Money doesn’t make up for emotional…[Read more]

      • No I absolutely think it’s a terrible secret for him to have to keep. But it’s not his moms fault, it’s his grandparents fault, so it’s kinda shitty to ruin her engagement party over it. He shouldn’t have to keep it, but there’s a time and a place for dealing with that and a party isn’t that place.

      • Ka3L replied 2 weeks ago

        I agree, I’m getting tired of the crapping on Liam attitude. Karma is the most self-centred character in the whole show but she doesn’t get crapped on as much as Liam. Liam is still just a teenager, and to have to keep that big of a secret when everybody in your family treats like crap is horrible. Since Amy ruined the party and Liam got blamed…[Read more]

        • Riese replied 2 weeks ago

          I mean, I also took Amy to task for ruining the party? I’m hyperbolic about how much I like a thing/person as much as I am about how much I dislike a thing/person.

        • Liam has homophobic attitudes toward lesbians and according to the show he apparently fulfilled his dream, since Amy suddenly craves men sexually now after sleeping with him.

          Gee, I wonder why he isn’t popular among lesbian women and their allies…

          • Ka3L replied 2 weeks ago

            He doesn’t seem happy about having “fulfilled his dreams”… If he was such a douche bag he would have been celebrating and shouting about it all over the school. To me he comes across as ignorant as a product of his environment.

          • And that’s exactly the problem – they made him a lesbophobe but they don’t portray it as a big deal. By trying to make the audience like him, without ever calling out his attitudes toward lesbians and make it clear how ignorant and damaging they are (which would be hard now, since Amy after being portrayed and gaybaited as a lesbian suddenly…[Read more]

      • “Sometime the writers on autostraddle come off as a bit man-hating. It’s repellent to see the stereotype perpetuated. He’s no worse character than anyone else on this over the top show.”

        Perceiving lesbians as a “challenge” to “conquer” really isn’t according to you that bad, and disliking such character is a sign of “man-hating”??

        • Ka3L replied 2 weeks ago

          It’s pretty obvious that he’s actually in love with Karma and doesn’t just want to “conquer” a lesbian. He even got pushed into the threesome idea, how many times exactly did we hear Liam say that all he wanted was to turn a lesbian? It seems you’ve already made up your mind to hate him so go ahead if it makes you feel better. I’m taking myself…[Read more]

          • Gregg, do you think part of Liam’s attraction to Karma is about the fact that he thinks she’s a lesbian?

            GS: Definitely. I mean, realistically, with straight guys in school, I think if you ask a bunch of guys, do they think it’s hot? They’ll say yes.

            MJW: Well, it’s hot and it boosts your confidence, right?

            GS: It’s like a challenge, you…[Read more]

          • BTW, I see that one of your favorite TV shows is “Sherlock”, where they made Adler a lesbian only to show how cool main character is because she couldn’t help falling in love and lust with him.

      • “Sometime the writers on autostraddle come off as a bit man-hating. It’s repellent to see the stereotype perpetuated.”

        Tabling the misandry thing for a second, real people aren’t stereotypes. Period. But that’s not what you said, you didn’t say that Riese *was* a stereotype, you said she was *perpetuating* the stereotype — causing the…[Read more]

    • Whoa wait how did I miss that Heather Hogan was coming to Autostraddle?! THAT’S FANTASTIC NEWS. OK, now I will finish reading this recap. Thank you.

      • She just announced it today on her social media presences!


          I kid you not, this feels like Christmas.

          This is everything that I have ever dreamed and prayed to the queer lady internet god(desses) for.

          Excuse me, I’m continue to flail about my apartment now.


          (It’s such big news, I just went to my…[Read more]

        • Oh wow, thank god, because I was actually just afraid that you were just messing with us like “HAHA WE CAN ONLY DREEEEEEEEEEEEAM”.

          First Roxanne Gay on The Toast, now Heather Hogan on Autostraddle? WE CAN HAVE NICE THINGS AFTER ALL!!!

      • She was the only reason I still check AfterEllen as regularly as I do. SO FUCKING EXCITED, Y’ALL. When I was a baby queer who didn’t know where to look or have much to read, I lived at AfterEllen. Then media production intensified and I got more discerning in what I wanted to read/what I expect from my queer media and moved mostly to…[Read more]

      • I’m SOOOOOOOOO happy that HH is coming to Autostraddle, but I also want to know, does this have anything to do with TotallyHer Media’s acquirement of AfterEllen? Because Karman Kregloe is also stepping down as EiC.

    • But srsly Reagan was mad cute

    • I love how you kept writing “where’s Reagan?” because that was my thought process exactly. I am SO ready for Amy to move on from Karma to her, although I’m slightly sad Jasmine from season one totally disappeared.
      Also I don’t really hate Liam at all after this episode, even if he makes me roll my eyes constantly.

      • I had the exact same feelings about Jasmine! I was so excited to see a lady-loving women of color on television. I thought it would have been so great if they had an interracial lesbian couple. I really want Jasmine back on.

    • This episode was a huge improvement from last week’s mess (mostly because of the cute girl that flirted with Amy.) Side note: How much longer will they drag on this whole unrequited love thing b/w Amy and Karma?

      • it looks like that’s gonna be the topic for next week’s episode, which is really really unfortunate. i’m ready for her to move on.


      Also I don’t know if anyone has watched the scene from next week’s episode that they have online but it looks like Amy’s mother–while she’s still pretty much pulling for Amy to go “jk I’m straight”–has at least started making an effort to be supportive and understanding, in her way, which I appreciate. The “I’m…[Read more]

    • I can never decide if it’s better to watch the episode before or after reading the recap. This week I read 1st but I’m actually pretty excited to see this episode, anything is better than last week.

    • I am still 100% here for Oliver.

      • But I mean, his character is kind of like the closest thing we have on to an even-maybe-kind-of-coded-as-trans-feminine-young-person on television.

        So yeah. Representation.

    • I have still only watched two episodes of this and I am just immensely enjoying the recaps. For this reason I have only ever seen screencaps of Oliver, but I know that I have a big old bisexual crush on him.

    • I really liked season 1 of this show against all of my own expectations, but so far I’m feeling let down by season 2. I dunno. For all we were promised no queerbaiting with Amy they are doing some pretty shitty stuff to her character. This week was a little better because it lacked the last episode’s ridiculous racism (why was that plot even a…[Read more]

      • “For all we were promised no queerbaiting with Amy they are doing some pretty shitty stuff to her character. ”

        Never trust showrunners, honey. All they do is lie to try to keep you watching their show. The only thing I’m looking forward to with this show is if this season’s finale will be worst than the first one and how long it will take…[Read more]

        • Soooo true. I don’t know why I still get my hopes up. Maybe I need to make a new rule never to watch shows with gay characters after the first season? That’s the longest any show seems to be able to maintain before devolving into BS.

          • 2014 has been my year of zero fucks in regards to tv “lesbians”. I have been burned far too many times to the point where I just have to get out of the abusive relationship I clearly have with these kinds of shows.

    • Riese, I absolutely loved this recap, and I think it was one of your best ones ever! “NOBODY PUTS AMY BACK IN THE CLOSET!” “HAHAHA. Don’t worry, I’d never not abort this guy’s baby.” The Gossip Girl reference.

      If Amy and Reagan continue to have the sizzling chemistry that they had together in that closet, I’m completely onboard with shipping…[Read more]

      • Riese replied 2 weeks ago

        ” The attraction between the two feels believable so far, and they haven’t even had a scene together for more than 30 seconds. And they’re both so hot too!”


    • I’ve still never seen a single episode of this but read the recaps religiously.
      Also I absolutely LOST it at “But we still don’t know who killed Jenny? What a devastating story”
      Need more Laverne in my life always.


      I really really need to find a job so I can join A+, you guys are so good to me.

      Also, Oliver was reading Nietzsche, I’m starting to think that he is high-school-me… hiding out people-watching, crushing on unavailable maybe-lesbians, reading Thus Spoke Zarathustra (and hating Jenny Schecter even more),…[Read more]

    • “Riese has written 1756 articles for us.”

      Sorry, totally off-topic, but that just caught my eye. It is A LOT.

      • Riese replied 2 weeks ago

        i know, right? and that doesn’t even count for the articles by “the team” that were actually by me or involved weeks upon weeks of my work to get them up

    • Should I suffer through the show for Laverne? Because I lobe her but I have my limits.

      Obligatory: I hate Shane

      • Clearly meant love not lobe
        Though I may lobe her too (Google’s lobe)

      • Riese replied 2 weeks ago

        I mean, she has a pretty big role in this episode. You could just fast forward through the scenes she’s not in.

      • Madge replied 2 weeks ago

        Gasp! I’m not the only one that doesn’t love Shane.

        • No, I can’t stand him either but you can tell he is the showrunner’s pet so I’m not going to hold my breath that he’s going to disappear. Same goes for Liam.

    • I was super disappointed by Laverne’s role in this. Not only was her performance pretty hammy (which could’ve been fine because humour and stuff), but I’m pretty sure that – by having her character choose Oliver for the club, etc – it means we won’t be seeing her again? This was probably already known by those who had read about how long she’d…[Read more]

    • Most of the characters on this show are all half-well-written, they all eventually fall on awful stereotypes or just never evolve. There is a handful of episodes in which ONE CHARACTER AT A TIME gets a chance to show another side to them or learn and grow. But that’s it, the rest of the season just seems to forget those moments and go back to…[Read more]

  • Morgan changed their profile picture 2 weeks, 1 day ago

  • ThumbnailLast night’s episode of my favorite currently-airing sitcom, The Mindy Project, introduced this season’s brand new lesbian character, Dr. Jean Fishman, played by Niecy Nash. You may remember Niecy Nash from Reno […]

    • I knew you’d have prompt coverage of this wonderment! I really liked the episode and think it’ll be cool to have Dr. Fishman as a semi-antagonist.
      (I think they might have been married and not just dating? Her and Julie Goldman?)

      (Also, I truly appreciate that someone other than me occasionally still thinks Lawyer Ted before Danny Castellano.)

      • I had “married to julie goldman” in the headline when I published this post and then I had a panic like, “wait. were they really married? or did i just assume that?” and since i was in that rare period of time in tv land where the episode was still inaccessible online in any capacity I couldn’t double check so I changed it to girlfriended and…[Read more]

    • i made that face for the ENTIRE buttsex episode

      like, what a mess

      hopefully this one will restore balance to the mindyverse

    • I knew Niecy Nash was going to play a recurring lesbian character and was super-psyched because YES, Reno 911! I have the box set. And Raineesha was totally my favorite. But I had no idea Julie Goldman was playing her wife till she showed up! I hope she’ll make another visit or two as well. I was a little annoyed that Jean would cheat on her wife…[Read more]

      • Yes I was JUST thinking about how funny it was that she wore that plaid shirt and no one even said anything, which kind of made it funnier. xD

    • Humm, maybe I’ll give it a chance and start watching it. It didn’t interest me at all before.

    • Haven’t watched since Season 1 and now I have to because duh

    • So, is it ridiculously weird that the feeling I got when Julie Goldman came on screen, was that somehow my real life and the Mindy Show world were intersecting? Nevermind that I only know JG from her webisodes…

    • i actually screamed at my tv when julie walked out. best ever.

  • Welcome to You Need Help! Where you’ve got a problem and yo, we solve it. Or we at least try.


    I feel very shitty, Riese :/ I’m almost thirty and haven’t achieved huge success in my professional life […]

    • “I think we get down on ourselves the most when we feel like we’re stuck in a bad spot and we don’t trust ourselves to do anything about it.”

      True fact!

      Thanks Riese! This is some really good advice, and if that reader needed to hear it, and I needed to hear it, I would wager there are bunch of other readers who need to hear it too. Anyway,…[Read more]

    • “There are people reading your question who have the things you want who are thinking, ‘damn, I wish I had a girlfriend like this girl does.'”

      Damn, I wasn’t even thinking about my lack of a girlfriend til this line. :(

      But this is all great advice! I hate being so far behind many of my college friends when it comes to money, but I love my…[Read more]

    • oh my gosh, i really needed to hear all of this, especially right now. i’m still a student and no one around me has money so it doesn’t bother me that i’m perpetually broke, but the feeling of success/lack of it is such a stupidly important thing to me. as an artist i’m constantly comparing myself – the first thing i do when looking up an artists…[Read more]

    • Ugh, the timing of this is seriously great for me. Granted, I’m a few years younger that the person who sent you that message, but it seems like all of my friends have their shit 100% together and I’m over here like “what’s up I still live with my parents and eat ramen twice a day lol holler.”

      Like, my friends are all wearing slacks and taking…[Read more]

      • Congratulations! It doesn’t matter how long it takes, you’re on the road and chugging along — and you got straight As! Well done :D

    • I, too, am nearing 30 (next week!) and feeling like I’m unsuccessful. I needed to read this.

    • Riese you are the best. I love this so much.

    • Riese can you start a newsletter that just emails this advice to me maybe once a month? That is a service I could benefit from.

    • I needed to hear a lot of this today. Thank you, Riese :)

    • There’s so much truth in this. I’m in my mid-twenties and two years ago I thought I had finally figured out what I wanted to do in my professional life, but I’ve come to realize that I really want to do something totally different, which means giving up on everything I’ve been working for and starting over AGAIN when I already felt wayyy behind my…[Read more]

    • Sometimes I find posts on here that help me more than anything else in life. (OK more often than sometimes. 90% of the time) Up until a few months ago, I thought I always wanted to work in the hospital as a nurse. But then a lot of people at work started talking about things and opportunities as a nurse and sometimes I think about ‘what if’ and…[Read more]

      • My sisters are both still with my parents (ain’t nobody can afford to live solo in California!) and I 10000% endorse staying with your parents when the relationship is good. Benefits for everyone!

      • Nursing is a pretty awesome job because there are so many environments to work in and so many specialties (I’m an OR nurse, current civilian and former military). But the education is seriously draining- lots of clinical time, and it will be really challenging if you aren’t sure it’s for you. As far as the financial side goes, a number of…[Read more]

        • How cool! You and my wife are OR nurses. Its an area I could probably never do.

          That is very very true. Nursing school isnt for everyone..you do kind of shun your social life to the side. Im surprised i even managed nursing school given my drinking memories. Haha. But I know its a very stable profession because healthcare isnt something that…[Read more]

      • I’m also part of the 25yo-living-with-parents club! It’s the only rational option for me at the moment, but my brain still tries to make me feel bad about it. Sometimes it succeeds. Sometimes it doesn’t. I’m just really grateful to have such awesome parents.

    • “We broke up, obvs, because I was a criminal who wanted to date girls.”
      This is how I’d like to describe every time I broke up with a boy. Actually, I think I want “Criminal who wants to date girls” business cards to give conservative relatives

    • oh riese, i love you. the whole second half of your statement REALLY spoke to me. I’m 33 and still have no idea if i am gay or not, not sure i love my job anymore (toddlers are draining my soul), barely make enough to live alone (which i know is a luxury), and don’t know what i want to be when i am grown up, which is now. UGH, LIFE. And yet, day…[Read more]

      • You can get out of that mindset! I believe in you! It’s hard and scary and sometimes feels hopeless, but it’s worthwhile and you’re worthwhile and we all have your back. <333

    • I had an 18-month stretch of unemployment that ended this year, and these are the kinds of things I was repeating to myself on a regular basis. I really wanted to hear them from other people, just to know I wasn’t just giving myself false hope.

      I got lucky, and now I have the privilege of struggling with impostor syndrome. It’s mostly under…[Read more]

      • Yup, I also live in imposter syndrome land. And not just professionally – I keep waiting for my friends to realize I’m not the awesome person they think I am…

        My brother came up with an ingenious way to fight it. “If these people are all so much better than me and they think I’m great, they must be right and I must be wrong because I’m such…[Read more]

        • (i have the worst case of imposter syndrome ever, which as you can imagine is complicated for a person who does the job i do)

          • I can imagine, yeah. I know that telling you that I think you’re a badass isn’t likely to make you believe it, but… YOU’RE A BADASS OKAY

      • I feel an Imposter Syndrome’s Anonymous Support Group is needed.
        Where we can all do our day and night jobs safely and ?competently? and then go to the Anonymous Support Group with a mask over our faces so no one knows who they are talking to, and all sorts of shame and integrity are preserved and remain confidential, but we talk and share and…[Read more]

    • this was so fucking amazing. thank you, riese!

    • Thanks for the pep talk Riese. I needed the shit out of this today.

    • Thanks for this. My gf is doing so well and we’ve only been out of undergrad for a year. I mean I know I’m lucky to be in graduate school but I’m so tried of volunteer work and unpaid internships. I feel like I made responsible choices but there just isn’t work. It’ll another two years before I can even hope at gaining financial independence.…[Read more]

    • The part about sometimes your job isn’t super fulfilling is so true! I spent so many years doing what I’m passionate about- working with disadvantaged kids- but not advancing in a career or making enough money to live on. Now I’m working in a job that is 100% not my passion- but I get paid a ton more and have job security- and I volunteer with…[Read more]

    • Yes. This is relevant to my life. Because a ton of my friends are 10-15 years older than me. Of course their lives are more put together than mine! Of course they have real full-time adult jobs and have serious relationships and even children! They have had at least 10 years more time to get to that point!

      But at the same time, I’m looking…[Read more]

    • Sometimes you just need a cheesy country song to spell it out for you:

      “I will stumble, I will crawl, bang my head against these walls, in the end I won’t have it all, but I’ll stand tall.”

      Priorities shift and goals are moving targets, but if vacations and bank accounts are what kept us standing tall, I never would have made it out of…[Read more]

    • This is such a good thing to read one week into grown-up life. Thank you always, Riese.

    • I’ve recently made the choice to STOP having the “professional” well paying job with fancy nice work clothes, because it made me miserable.

      Now I’m back to being a loser, and kind of feeling shitty about it. Thank you for this very well timed, wonderful advice! So much of what I needed to hear.

    • I’m sliding into 32, wildly underemployed (and I feel it even harder because I’ve had internships in the place I “deserve” to be employed, ahahah entitlement, and I’ve never gotten a full-time offer out of anything), and painfully single with maybe one actual not-straight female friend. I ALSO NEEDED THIS. Ugh. Let’s all hold each other very tightly.

    • Bookmarking the eff out of this, and I might even set a calender reminder to read it at regular intervals. Thanks Riese!

    • THANK YOU so much for this. I’m in grad school in a field I’m not even sure I want to be in, totally drowning in anxiety at the moment, while a bunch of my college friends are having real jobs and lives and can do things like rent their own apartments and act like grownups. And the impostor syndrome is a pretty much daily occurrence whenever I’m…[Read more]

    • this is the second awesome advice column i’ve read today (the other being from the other side of the same page, http://nymag.com/thecut/2014/09/ask-polly-i-hate-my-job-what-should-i-do.html) but this is the one i’m going to bookmark. stellar.

    • To the person who wrote to Riese, dont feel bad okay? Remember that theres a lot of here with just about the same problem or situation andwe are here for you. Thats what I have come to love about this place. No haters. <3

    • This was something I really needed to read today, so thank you!
      Just trying to take deep breaths and focus my energy on being happy for my friends instead of freaking out, haha.

    • I love this and needed to hear it so so much, many thanks, Riese.

      I perpetually feel like I’m playing dress-up in my business professional clothes and any day now they’re going to find out I don’t really know how to adult.

    • From the “it gets better” side of the fence:
      At 30, I was struggling with a lot of mental health issues. I didn’t have the terminal graduate degree I was “supposed to” have by 30. Didn’t have any kids and my life plan said I “should” by then. Didn’t have a real job. Felt like a big loser/failure in many ways.

      At 36, I am pretty happy and…[Read more]

    • Riese this is so timely and so perfect, right down to the Joan Didion (though I don’t envy her now). Autostraddle’s advice column really is a hidden gem.

    • I constantly feel inadequate about every factor of my life but then I go for a walk on the beach and other people’s dogs choose to hang out with me because I am great at throwing sticks and giving unlimited pats and the owners literally have to drag them away as I quietly whistle them back.

      I forgot what my train of thought was because I…[Read more]

    • I have ridiculously successful friends (who are that way, I have to remind myself, in large part because of a hefty amount of privilege, because I went to a college where privilege abounds) and every time I start comparing myself to them and feeling like a fuckup, I force myself to stop and ask, “Well, what are you going to do about it?” Sometimes…[Read more]

    • this article came out at just the right time. thanks for writing this! being an adult is the weirdest

    • I read this as I was sitting in my car waiting for a job interview. Talk about perfect timing and a great perspective reminder. Thanks, Riese!

      • Woops I think I forgot to close a tag somewhere in there. Can someone fix it for me please?

    • I love you, Riese. I hate how financial stress can make us feel worthless as humans. Grrrrr….The comparisons to friends can be deadly. I’ve made a number of changes to make this less painful (no more Facebook, no more pretending I can afford my rich friends’ lifestyle). Hanging out with people who are also following their own path on their own…[Read more]

    • spot on!

    • Wow, Riese. Thank you for this. In a dramatic reversal of roles Carrie actually e-mailed this post to me and said “you should read this NOW!” and in a less-dramatic/predictable return to our usual roles she was right. And you are perfect and really just have the best words for everything ever.

  • HELLO and welcome to the 148th installment of Things I Read That I Love, wherein I share with you some of the longer-form journalism/essays I’ve read recently so that you can read them too and we can all know more […]

    • I really like Zadie Smith’s essays. She says some of the things I’m thinking that I didn’t even know I was thinking.

    • As soon I saw “The Plane That Fell From The Sky” and the year 1981 my brain jumped to oh my this about the Pam Am flight that crashed in a residential neighborhood killing everyone on the plane and some folks on the ground but read the rest of the stuff under the link and nope this one’s not it cause these folks didn’t crash.

      I guess something…[Read more]

    • This question has plagued me since the dawn of this segment. In the title, is “read” past or present tense?

    • I’ve always loved this segment, I read the articles when I’m bored at work which has led me down many a Wikipedia rabbit hole. I’ve always wondered what the asterisks mean though? Are those ones like, especially good?

  • ThumbnailWelcome to the third recap of the second season of Faking It, a politically progressive dance film from the same network that brought you A Double Shot Of Love With The Ikki Twins. I apologize for the lateness of […]

    • “Almost as if Television simply prefers humans who are into men, in general. Seriously I wanna see a showrunner at the fucking upfronts talk about how the male lead on his show isn’t sure about his identity yet or doesn’t believe in labels. Sometimes it feels like the message is: women are never enough.” YES YES YES

      Your thoughts are my…[Read more]

    • Lex replied 3 weeks ago

      The story is set in Texas yet they import a latin@ love interest from Brasil. Not the just the love interest but a busload of sexy Brasilian refugees that are so far just eye candy.

      Are Chicanas unacceptable, too unfashionable?

      • It’s idiotic story lines like this that make me just not really enjoy watching. I wish it would focus on Amy’s road to self discovery instead of the other side characters.

      • SERIOUSLY THOUGH. This whole white washed Austin business has been killing me since the show started! There are a lot of people with Mexican heritage here specifically (I’m one of them!) but the high school appears to be in a white people bubble. Also, chime in here Austinites, but there is no way Amy’s house could be in Austin. That grass is way…[Read more]

    • “This year’s Network Responsibility Index revealed that in the 2014-2015 TV season, we can expect to see 31 bisexual female characters and 44 lesbian characters, as opposed as 12 bisexual male characters and 82 gay male characters. WEIRD, HUH? Almost as if Television simply prefers humans who are into men, in general.”

      I’m confused by this.…[Read more]

      • But majority of those lesbian characters are showed to be sexually attracted to men.

      • Besides, I think that the way they portrayed Amy doesn’t crush but strengthens damaging stereotypes about queer women’s sexuality.

        Putting the fact they lied to fans about Amy being lesbian aside, she was showed to be completely disinterested in guys before. Oliver made her feel nothing. But then, after having sex with Liam (which, as Covington…[Read more]

        • tru.
          It’s so disheartening.
          I remember when I was in middle school, not out, didn’t know any other queer kids, I’d watch any show featuring young lesbians (really anything with subtext tbh). To see someone on screen that I thought I could see myself in, and then to have that taken away was not a good feeling. They’re really not doing anything…[Read more]

        • yeah, you’re totally right. It was poorly handled and is probably more damaging than good. I should have thought it through some more. I actually forgot all about Oliver from last season. Thanks for that reply.

    • Kay replied 3 weeks ago

      God, I hated this episode. Bring on Laverne Cox already.

    • Yes yes yes, all of this. This week’s episode was offensive in lots of different ways (mostly just racist though. Very racist).

      I was disappointed with the Amy having feels for a guy thing too – I felt it was forced and I disliked that it played out through the lens of Karma and what Karma thought. I would like to see Amy exploring her…[Read more]

    • Who even let this episode out of the gate? Like, if the writers were okay with it is ENOUGH of an issue for me (credibility wise) but there’s a lot of people involved in these things. Whoever thought this was good quality entertainment, on par with the previous episodes, and would continue to secure a bright future for the show, obviously…[Read more]

    • Autostraddle is saving TV, basically. Zero percent chance I would watch this without the promise of recaps <3

    • “Sometimes it feels like the message is: women are never enough.” Yes, this. I’ve never managed to articulate it so clearly, but that’s definitely a sentiment I’ve run up against time and time again in real life as well as on TV.

      I was really rooting for this show, but this episode disappointed me on SO MANY levels with the racism and general…[Read more]

      • I think they intended for Shane kissing Karma to be interpreted as Shane wondering “How have both Amy AND Liam fallen so crazy in love with Karma? Who ARE you? Some magical human being whom everyone is attracted to, defying the laws of how the universe works? Nope, those two are just weirdly obsessed with Karma”. But it could too easily come off…[Read more]

    • Covington made it clear in recent interview that indeed the fact Amy couldn’t help her body responding to men was the reason why she had sex with Liam:

    • So they lied to and gaybaited lesbian fans:

      “I don’t know about Karma’s path, but for Amy, she is a lesbian, and Carter and I talked about that. We don’t want it to be a tease, we don’t want people to feel like they can relate to this vulnerable process that she’s going through, and they can relate to this girl because she’s a lesbian and then…[Read more]

      • I feel like there’s a clash between how Rita approaches Amy (which makes more sense) and how the writers are trying to structure Amy which is awful and forced and gross.

    • I’m with you, Riese. I also like and enjoy this show, even if it’s the unpopular opinion.

      I know they’ve said that Amy is currently questioning and exploring her sexuality. But I used to have a solid prediction about which way they will go when they finally do “bust out the label maker” for Amy. And now I can’t seem to figure it out. During…[Read more]

      • “she feels more of a sexual attraction to guys and more of an emotional attraction to girls.”

        Which is really terrible, typical desexualization of queer female sexuality in its same-sex aspect.

        • Oops, now I realize that I meant to say “more of a ROMANTIC attraction to girls”.

          • I don’t think it changes anything. Like I noted above, it strengthens damaging notions that queer women’s same-sex attractions are more emotional in nature because all women do is to cuddle and talk about feelings, while when it comes to attraction to men, it’s raw, real, strong sexual lust, because it leads to procreation, which desexualizes…[Read more]

          • But to make things clear, I agree that’s what the show’s doing, I don’t call you out for your interpretation, which I think is, unfortunately, correct.

          • I think the show has made it clear that Amy’s sexually attracted to Karma. She gets uncomfortable when Karma undresses and she admitted (at least by not denying) fantasizing about her while mastrubating.

            I don’t think the convo in the bathroom was meant to mean Amy wasn’t sexually attracted to girls, but that sometimes she’s attracted to guys…[Read more]

          • Annie, now IMO it looks like she’s much more strongly turned on by men than women – it’s men in general that wake “Sexual Hulk” up in her, that’s why she couldn’t resist having sex with Liam despite disliking him when she was drunk (confirmed by Covington), while when it comes to women, it’s only Karma, girl she’s in love with.

            They had chance…[Read more]

    • “Sometimes it feels like the message is: women are never enough.” Exactly. And it’s so ironic that women are told this about other women. Because men are told that women are more than enough for them, women are everything! What a double standard.

    • There is such a thing as having different sexual and romantic orientations, I doubt the writers would go there, but it’d be nice. I only know this show from these recaps, but it seems like Amy could be a homoromantic bisexual, (she was excited about the threesome for the sex with Karma right?) or with fluid sexuality this could just be a small thing.

      • And? How does anything you said negate Riese’s point or the fact that the people from the show lied to us saying that Amy is lesbian: “but for Amy, she is a lesbian, and Carter and I talked about that”.

    • “Sometimes it feels like the message is: women are never enough.” Well, in a world where men are considered subjects and active agents while women are considered passive objects of male pleasure, it follows naturally that men can afford to disregard women entirely if not attracted to or amused by them, while women on the other hand, given their…[Read more]

    • This episode felt like it was written by the staff at Saved By The Bell. Deliberately insulting. Which is a bummer, I’d really been enjoying the show and giving them the benefit of the doubt.

      That said, the final image of Liam saying he has to tell Karma and then the shot of Amy/Karma best-friending-it-up gleefully on the Ferris Wheel did at…[Read more]

    • Yeah, I understand the anger over lesbian-bating because that is a totally arguable point. I just want to say that as a lesbian-identified person who sometimes has superficial feelings for guys, I had a mini-happy dance when Amy said she feels the same way. This little nuance to a lesbian identity is hardly ever talked about or held up as…[Read more]

      • “This little nuance to a lesbian identity is hardly ever talked about or held up as something that is ok to feel”

        It’s completely the opposite. It’s hard to find a lesbian character that isn’t sexually attracted to men. Just few days ago on “Hell on Wheels” lesbian character started sleeping with a man, being obviously entranced by lust for…[Read more]

      • Yeah, at this point, I’m willing to give them the benefit of the doubt. Amy is in the middle of a journey of self-discovery, and until we reach the end and find out the answer to the question of how she identifies (whether she’s lesbian or bisexual), I’m going to hold off on passing major judgement. Because Amy could easily end up being a lesbian,…[Read more]

      • Pretty much every lesbian character on television has that “nuance to a lesbian identity”. The true anomaly is the lesbian on tv who doesn’t experience feelings, even superfificial, for a guy. As for the identity is her own thing, that reminds me of political lesbians who would call themselves lesbians while having sex with men all the time and…[Read more]

    • I actually really identified with Amy’s my body reacts but my mind doesn’t bit. Like just because you are physically into guys doesn’t mean you aren’t a lesbian romantically. For me as like a super-gay I used to feel really upset and that I couldn’t identify as a lesbian whenever I saw a guy and got feels, but then I realized it was just my body…[Read more]

      • oops just realized this is exactly what Zoe said above me but ya :)

      • But you’re aware that there are popular damaging homophobic stereotypes that lesbian women “deep down need d***” and they’re not “truly gay”, like gay men are, something that also stands behind sexual harassment and even “corrective” rapes, and that, just like Riese pointed out, overwhelming majority of queer female characters (including lesbian…[Read more]

    • Seeing comments from lesbian identified women who are sexually attracted to men and condone this kind of portrayal I just wanted to say this. I’m corrective rape survivor. That I, in loose translation, just need to be f***ed good to start liking men was something I’ve heard when that happened. Whenever I see yet another portrayal of lesbian…[Read more]

      • I certainly did not mean to invalidate your experience, corrective rape is a violent patriarchal act and I hope nothing I say would every condone it.

        However I don’t think that my identity as a “sexually fluid lesbian who is also sometimes attracted to men” invalidates your identity as a “lesbian who is only every attracted to women.” This…[Read more]

        • You and I claim the same label, but your and mine feelings are contradictory.
          You want your experiences as a lesbian who’s attracted to men be considered valid, which, because of popular homophobic stereotypes that say pretty much the same, works against women like me, since example of women like you is used as an argument for our…[Read more]

          • This could not be said better Amelia. Television, at this time, is giving viewers two types of lesbians. There is the lesbian who is sexually attracted to men and the lesbian who dies to assist in the plotlines for straight people. One of the major reasons the former is pushed on viewers is that there seems to be a hesitance by sites to call…[Read more]

          • I would like to say thank you for your thoughts and comments. For a long time I kept reconsidering how well identifying myself as lesbian suited me because I do experience sexual attraction to men and I’ve had some enjoyable experiences with them.
            Your comment, along with a couple of other recent experiences has made me reconsider my “label” and…[Read more]

        • And if you’re speaking about “sexual fluidity”, I recommend to read the book of the person who created that term and theory, Lisa M. Diamond. Because in the concept of sexuality she formed on conclusions from her longitudinal research, “sexually fluid lesbian” is not a woman who’s sexually attracted to men and women but emotionally prefers women.…[Read more]

    • I never watched faking it again after the season 1 finale but riese’s recaps made me want to comment.

      For the Tv Gods aka Producers, Did you guys know there is a sexuality named bisexuality? But, It’s evident to say that you guys are fixed on the idea of creating characters like amy. I’m not hating on you guys. I just want to let you know.

    • 1. This episode was so ridiculously racist. seriously what the fuck, MTV.

      2. I really genuinely love the show – mostly because I relate so much to Amy. I relate to the occasionally-being-turned-on-by-men thing (which definitely happened more in high school than it does now) and I relate to the having-drunk-boring-sex-with-men thing and to the…[Read more]

      • “(Also it feels relevant in this conversation to mention stats on queer women and sexual assault- bi women are at a much higher risk of sexual violence than lesbians and straight women. “Additionally, nearly half of all bisexual women and one in eight lesbian women have experienced rape in their…[Read more]

    • Also can we talk about how Shane as a character is such a great portrayal of white cis gay men? Like he’s so horribly racist and misogynistic and he acts like he can just kiss Karma without her permission (and it seems against her will) and get away with it because he’s gay so obviously his touching a woman’s body without her consent is ok… and…[Read more]

    • All I wanted was for Amy to be a real lesbian, that’s it. They couldn’t give it to me. I love you Shane, but not even you can keep me watching this show after they confirmed her bisexuality. I’m out. I’m tired of this storyline.

    • I did want to comment on everyone else’s responses of the racism.

      The whole show is essentially a caricature; a humorously skewed version of everything like how the school isn’t exactly like most high schools we’d think of. They poke fun at many attributes of American teens and families. I actually think it was more of a parody of how…[Read more]

      • THIS. It’s so obviously over the top to me that I have no idea how anyone could not see it as a parody of the way American’s, or at least the American media, imagine a whole group of people to be.

    • “Have you noticed that all their friendship rituals seem like, kinda affected and youngish?” Totally agree. How old are these girls supposed to be? When I was a teenager my friends and I bonded by drinking lots of cheap booze, going on road trips and skipping class to go to the beach. They act like they’re 12.

      • Thank you! I mean maybe I watch too much Skins but I was one of the best behaved most academically serious most sober kids I knew in high school and we did a lot more drinking / breaking into hotel pools or pretty much anywhere / drugs / sex / smoking at all night diners / watching movies for grown ups / generally fucking shit up / than these kids…[Read more]

      • I don’t know if it was because I didn’t have a BFF, I went to a boarding school as a day student, or because I was super boring but my high school socialization mainly consisted of eating food, watching TV or movies, and occasional afterschool hangouts in nearby woods and fields where we mostly just talked about feelings and emotions before we had…[Read more]

    • This episode was so painful to watch. Bringing in the Brazilians was such a lazy plot device, the racism was disgusting, I almost gave up at the sunscreen scene.

      Amy deserves so much more than a half-hearted rebound with a hot chick with whom she can’t even communicate. And we deserve so much more than another sexually confused girl who can’t…[Read more]

    • As a brazilian… Just no. Nope. This episode was so racist I couldn’t bear to watch. (Also, those banners were in spanish and what language were they speaking? Because there’s no way in hell that was brazilian portuguese)

    • Theory re: Amy attraction to men.
      Amy was thinking so hard about Karma when she had sex with Liam that she was turned on during sex, not by Liam but by Karma. So she kind of finds men sexually attractive though a weird lampy, Karma related thought process.

      Yep, it is a shit theory but it beats “Here have a lesbian character, psyche! She is…[Read more]

    • Loving some of the comments here. I come to Autostraddle pretty frequently looking for guidance and validation, and it often feels like there aren’t enough critiques of the lesbian characters who writers feel the need to make sexually available to men. It’s a damaging trope we see in almost every single portrayal of lesbian women on TV, and it…[Read more]

    • THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR BRINGING UP THE RACISM!! I’m half Brazilian and I was completely floored by how disrespectful this episode was, and immediately resolved to never watch the show again. Did any of you guys notice how in the cafeteria, they had posters with “HOLA!” written on them?? That’s not even Portugeuse!! In Brazil, the equivalent would…[Read more]

  • Hey, have we told you lately how we love you? Is it too soon? Would it be better if we just said that we REALLY REALLY REALLY LIKE YOU? Or that maybe we don’t know that much, but we know this much is true: we are […]

  • ThumbnailGLAAD’s annual “Where We Are on TV” and “Network Responsibility Index” reports intend to serve as a barometer for progress in LGBTQ representation on American television, and this year’s reports, as usual, reflect […]

    • So stoked for some of these shows. I’m really enjoying brooklyn nine nine and gotham

    • I really love this list! There’s also Carmilla on Youtube where I believe pretty much all of the characters are lesbian as well as half the cast.

      • I am waiting with baited breath for the Autostraddle spotlight on Carmilla, where I can flail about my endless joy at this perfect little gem of a webseries’s existence in the comment section with everyone else.

        (Because seriously, you guys. This show is flawless besides the disappointing absence of queer folk of color. *crosses fingers that…[Read more]

        • Carmilla is so awesome. I really wish more people knew about it. I do wish that they had more POC but it really is a good show and the main character Lauren reminds me of the girl from Faking It.

          • Sorry to correct, but the main character in Carmilla is Laura. The character in Faking It is Lauren. Don’t worry, I’ve made that mistake myself at least once in my tags.

            (I’m really sorry I’m so obsessed with this show.)

        • Ahhhhh this is the best thing to happen to YouTube since cats were invented!! I’ve watched it three times now, and got my girlfriend addicted to it too! IT’S JUST SO GOOD AAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

          Who of the cast is also queer?? I’m guessing LaFontaine and Danny, but who else??

          Also, double-yes to anticipating Autostraddle’s coverage and…[Read more]

          • Carmilla’s actress, Natasha Negovanlis, and LaFontaine’s actress, Kaitlyn Alexander, have both confirmed themselves as queer. No word yet on Danny’s actress, Sharon Belle (she doesn’t have a Twitter). However, Natasha also said that she estimates at least 50% of the cast/crew/production team of Carmilla is queer, so that’s also thrilling.

            In…[Read more]

          • Yesssssssss, that’s fantastic!! And I only found out the other day that they’re Canadian which just makes my love triple.

            I really, really hope that they release a DVD set or have merch available soon because I will throw so much money at them!

    • Leanne is queer? What did I miss?

      • season 2, episode 6 (i.e. The Poussey Episode), Leanne says, “I had a thing once with my boss at Long John Silver. Then I found out his wife was wicked hot.”

        • Wow I totally missed that.

        • I interpreted that as her being flattered he would cheat on a hot wife with her! Rather than that there was anything going on with the wife. If she was queer it would be strange she would have taken Pennsatucky’s side in all the homophobic laundry rants of season 1.

          • Yeah, I didn’t see anything queer about the comment either. I see how it could be interpreted that way, but it wouldn’t really make sense in context.

    • I think that GLAAD’s reports are pretty far down the path of irrelevance if they (among other things) don’t take streaming services into account. It’s clear that some of the most noteworthy LGBT-inclusive TV programming is happening on streaming services, and original content from these sources will only grow in relevance as time goes on.…[Read more]

    • I really wish queer would stop being used as an umbrella term for all lgbtq people.

    • Who’s the one in the sheet music shirt? I’ll watch that show.

    • Omg, I will never stop watching tv now. Also, very sad and very unsurprised about the continued lack of trans* character on network tv. Good to see that GLAAD is making it more of a factor.

      Also, Transparent is SO good so far that it is the thing that has finally convinced me to start my Prime trial.

    • CBC is playing Janet King, an ABC (Australian Broadcasting Corporation) series, who’s main character is a lesbian (but white, cis, able bodied) but not sure how much of the show will focus on her sexuality and her relationship with her wife as only one episode has been aired. CBC also has an original TV show airing tonight called Strange Empire,…[Read more]

      • Kelsey, I can tell you that Janet King’s sexuality/relationship does feature strongly, but generally only has 1-4 mins of domestic scenes each episode.

        That said (and no spoilers) there is a developing storyline throughout the series.

        It’s an excellent show btw.

        (I’m an aussie)

    • House of Lies has two additional trans characters, Don Cheadle’s character’s pansexual, genderfluid child Roscoe and Roscoe’s love interest (as of early-ish in season three) Lex, also played by Bex Taylor-Klaus. AFAIK, Roscoe isn’t explicitly trans-identified, but Lex is and Roscoe’s gender identity does come up

      Marty: Hey, so, Lex? Boy or…[Read more]

    • It’s ‘interesting’ how generally the only demographics where representation of women surpasses the representation of men, are the demographics which are most easily sexualized, or sensationalized. (i.e. bisexual women, and trans women)

    • Killing Shay on Chicago Fire was the dumbest decision. I was such a Chi Fire addict, but I’m free now. On a male-dominated show they killed off one of two women – and that’s after killing or writing off 3 other women – and then replaced her with some boring straight lookalike as a future love interest. So annoyed. >:[

      • I’m still not over this. It was bad enough they killed her off but then to add this new blonde STRAIGHT woman is so transparent. I didn’t read anything about who was being killed off and I was naive to think they wouldn’t kill off one of only two women but then when it happened I was like, yea actually it’s not so surprising with this show’s track…[Read more]

        • I know, I was naive too. The writers “reasoning” for this was so stupid. They wanted to kill a character who affected the most people? Uh, kill the chief, kill the guy with a wife, kids, and co-ownership of the bar, kill Severide or Casey…. Ugh it drives me nuts and I haven’t seen any outcry about how this show seems to think women are so…[Read more]

          • Exactly! I watch too many supernatural shows because I was like there has to be a way she isn’t really dead but nope, soap opera magic would work too though haha. The writer’s reasoning actually pissed me off more because they seem clueless or unconcerned as to what kinds of tropes they fed into by killing her off.

    • I watched a bit of The Strain which just so happened to have in Dutch and she gets asked men or women and she answers something to the effect of: complicated relationships that end disastrously.

      So uh my betting money would be on bisexual. >_>

      Which is validly homo to me, bi the way, just got a vibe we’re only going to see her get a man if…[Read more]

    • Okay I realize this is 100% my fault and I’m mad at myself, not you, Riese…but I’m only part of the way through season 4 of Pretty Little Liars and I’m really upset about that thing I just read about a certain character who they killed off!!! Ugh. This is just proving to me that I need to rethink my priorities. Maybe I should have caught up on…[Read more]

    • Definitely on the verge of tears with that Leslie Shay spoiler there. I can’t handle this right now. You can find me in the chocolate aisle at Walgreens.

    • There are also Abby and Elodie on WGN’s (yes they apparently have scripted original dramas now?) Manhattan, which is about the Manhattan Project. I think it’s the best show on TV right now that no one is watching, and I’m surprised that I haven’t seen a ton of it floating around tumblr or other fandom-y parts of the Internet since WWII + queer…[Read more]

      • Haha, we literally made the same comment at the same time. Oopsy. Posted mine before the site refreshed with yours.

    • Rachel Brosnahan (Rachel Posner from House of Cards) also plays a not yet labeled but probably bisexual on WGN’s Manhattan (which is a pretty good show.) She’s been sleeping with a woman for the last couple of episodes.

    • Wow thank you for compiling this! What a great breakdown.

    • On previous episode of “Hell on Wheels” lesbian character Louise had sex with a man, which was initially forced, but she quickly reciprocated and started enjoying it and in next episode that aired few days ago, she’s showed to come back for more sex to him. The man even said that he turned her.

      • :sad panda face:

      • I need the names and pictures of the writers for both those episodes so I can ritualistically burn them in effigy, but it’s not the right time of year.

    • East Los High is SO GOOD. It’s the first show I can really think of that manages to pull off awesome soapiness at the same time as being really responsible. And Jocelyn is the cutest little lesbian.

    • It king of bugs me how you guys refer to all these characters as “queer.” Queer is literally a slur–and yes I get that people can reclaim slurs INDIVIDUALLY–but referring to all these characters (and real people in other articles) as “queer” just makes me uncomfortable. Is it really that hard to just say LGBT?

    • It kind of bugs me how you guys refer to all these characters as “queer.” Queer is literally a slur–and yes I get that people can reclaim slurs INDIVIDUALLY–but referring to all these characters (and real people in other articles) as “queer” just makes me uncomfortable. Is it really that hard to just say LGBT?

      • Well, this is true in someways but not in others. True, queer can be and is still considered a slur by many folks, and true it is used as a personal identifier for some folks(and not others), but false it is not reclaimed on a purely individual basis. I think it’s valid to critique the use of Queer as an umbrella term for people who do not…[Read more]

        • “On board the Q train.” I love this. My new favorite way to describe my sexuality.

    • Black Sails better not let me down again. They demolished Max and Eleanor. If I don´t see some Anne Bonny and Max time I will be one angry lesbian. I will be one angry black lesbian *growls*.

    • Thanks for putting this list together! Good to know which shows I should check out this tv season :)

      One quick correction: Almighty Johnsons isn’t canceled here in the U.S. – it originally aired in New Zealand and was canceled last December after 3 seasons, but now those seasons are airing on Syfy on Fridays (and, as far as I’m aware, they plan…[Read more]

    • Not a queer lady, but there is another trans character on TV in Tony on Orphan Black. There’s even a scene where one cis person corrects another cis person on Tony’s pronouns. My heart was warm.

    • I’m curious now in retrospect if Sara Lance was left out of this article accidentally, or if Autostraddle had an advance peek or spoiler knowledge of the events of the season premiere last night. My partner and I had thought it was odd at the time reading this that Sara was left off the list even though Nyssa was mentioned. This morning, that…[Read more]

    • Do we know whether there will be a season 3 of The Fosters?

    • Entirely unprepared for the little bit about Shay being killed off! Why, Autostraddle, why?! *sobs*

    • I could be wrong, but I thought that the whole storyline involving the “lesbian” having sex with the guy at the end of the “Faking It” season one was only because she had been drinking and didn’t really know what she was doing, and she was still confused about her sexuality and technically still “in the closet” to herself. Even though she was…[Read more]

    • What about Stahma from Defiance?

  • HELLO and welcome to the 147th installment of Things I Read That I Love, wherein I share with you some of the longer-form journalism/essays I’ve read recently so that you can read them too and we can all know more […]

    • That Zimmerman Family one was a weird read. I’m Canadian and while I followed George Zimmerman’s trial (and was infuriated by its verdict), I haven’t heard much else about him and definitely nothing about his strange clan. George and his siblings seem to have been adrift for the last decade and are clinging to the aftermath of “The Incident” as…[Read more]

      • Yeah like…they get to have a dead son and donations, you get to have a living (unimprisoned!) son and no donations…wanna trade?

    • I got really attached to the word ‘problematic’ around 2002 (in my early 20s) largely because it was a way of softening criticism for the sake of diplomacy when dealing with people who shut down when you say, call racism or white supremacy for what it is. It has the potential to describe those grey areas that aren’t intentionally/obviously fucked…[Read more]

    • I did not expect to cry but then I read the words: “When a pretty girl is raped, it’s a tragedy, and when a fat woman is raped, she should be grateful” all I could think about is a friend from childhood how very close that phrase is to what her rapist told her.

      And then all I can think about is the attempted stranger rape that occurred a…[Read more]

    • That Paula Deen article was wickedly sassy but also really thoughtful towards the end. It’s now my second favorite cruise ship essay after the DFW masterpiece shared in this column a while back.

  • ThumbnailWelcome to the second recap of the second season of Faking It, an educational television program for children from the same network that brought you The Pauly D Project.

    We open in the avant-garde […]

    • What is worse, that I think Lauren is my fave or that I could PAINFULLY relate to the Amy and Karma situation from this episode?

    • Ugh, so close with that kiss!

      I saw on tumblr someone being all “Karma’s tshirt is covered in arrows and Amy’s is covered in holes this is significant” and now I want to look for symbolism in EVERY costume (obviously the #karmy tshirts are kind of…obvious.)

      • Oh man, I remember reading into the outfit coordinations with Quinn and Rachel on Glee………………..siiiiiigh those were the days.

    • Amy’s trying-not-to-cry face is the actual worst. It’s like my heart time travels back to high school and I feel all of those hopeless-crush-on-my-best-friend feelings all over again.

    • when will this show not be boring

    • I really like this series, but honestly my favorite thing about it is reading your captions! Perfect as always

    • This recap is hilarious and I lol at this show/enjoy it. It kind of hurts my insides to relive all this shit from high school/crushing on the friend though??

    • Amy’s overalls and striped shirt outfit at the beginning was very cute and awesomely gay. And her expression when Karma took off her shirt was spot-on perfection.

      I though it was kinda eerie just how closely the characters and the plotlines from Faking It mirror those of the Twilight series. And I loved how they got all meta and snuck in an OTP…[Read more]

    • Also, once I was at the bridal or baby shower of a close family friend, and my friends and their cousins played Truth or Dare, and they totally Dared me to also drink a greenish-brown glass of a gross combo of random stuff, but I wouldn’t do it. I don’t remember what the punishment for that was (I was called a chicken and I had to answer two…[Read more]

      • I tried reading the After Ellen recaps, and I can’t anymore. I get more out of these recaps, and feel that over in After Ellen they are looking for what to nitpick on purpose.

        That being said, I my sleepovers in highschool had more UNO and drinking! We always got bored with truth or dare…

      • Riese replied 4 weeks ago

        I feel like sometimes the lies reveal just as much as a truth would? like if nobody would believe your lie than you may as well tell the truth. i think the risk of lying is that IF EVERYBODY LIES, THE WHOLE MOVEMENT SINKS

        • Yeah, the ideal way for it to work is that you only resort to lying for the few big secrets that you absolutely don’t want anyone else to know (Lauren, Amy, and Karma are the perfect example of this) and only when you don’t want to be dared to do something like drink inedible green goo liquid. It’s like, you’re not hooked up to a lie detector…[Read more]

    • I tried reading the After Ellen recaps, and I can’t anymore. I get more out of these recaps, and feel that over in After Ellen they are looking for what to nitpick on purpose.

      That being said, I my sleepovers in highschool had more UNO and drinking! We always got bored with truth or dare…

      • AfterEllen is always the worst. Yesterday someone sent me a link to a recent and thoroughly disturbing piece over there about femmes that made me want to tear my hair out.

    • Yuu replied 4 weeks ago

      I love this show, but it quickly went straight (pardon the pun) back to being boring after the first episode of the season. The Karma/Liam tension is mundane and overly drawn-out and literally nobody cares about them, the end.

      Side note: it really annoys me that the one Asian person in the show is a ditzy prop rather than an actual character.…[Read more]

    • Kate replied 4 weeks ago

      and once again, i must add yet another lesbian-themed show to my I WANTED YOU TO BE GOOD BUT YOU ARE SO NOT GOOD list. the list groweth.

    • Rayne replied 4 weeks ago

      JESUS joseph and mary, I cannot watch this show without wanting to straight up immolate Liam. What an entitled douche.

      “Oh hey, I’m mad at you because you didn’t totally OUT THIS GIRL to me while she was in the process of discovering her sexuality”

      When, ironically, Shane totally did? I mean, they all started the season under the impression…[Read more]

    • On the one hand, outing an intersex person during Truth or Dare is not acceptable even if she’s being a jerk.
      On the other hand, Karma’s general kindness to Amy is actually heartwarming in that it indicates that straight girls have come a long way since I was in Amy’s position.

    • I have to say though I am getting bored with the lack of girls making out, I am happy that though Karma doesn’t really know how to handle Amy being in love with her, she tells her straight up she isn’t into her like that, and doesn’t string her along.

      Also, if we could have more captions of Amy bragging about her mad sex skillz, that would make my day.

    • Caption game is en pointe today, Riese. Excellent work, as usual :)


      And this is when I died from the brilliance. Riese, these captions were PHENOMENAL, good job.

      I kinda feel like this episode was just a giant waste of time? I mean, I love Lauren exponentially with each episode, but the whole side-plot with the dudes was totally boring and…[Read more]

    • In case anyone on this site didn’t already know: when you fall in love with your straight best friend and then tell her and then you stay friends even though you’re crawling out of your skin to be around her….. in real life it’s not resolved in one damn chat at the end of an episode. And the hardest part is not any one particular moment, it’s…[Read more]

  • HELLO and welcome to the 146th installment of Things I Read That I Love, wherein I share with you some of the longer-form journalism/essays I’ve read recently so that you can read them too and we can all know more […]

    • I’m gonna admit that I didn’t read the whole Slack article, but I just wanted to say that the AS team should try it! You don’t have to pay for Slack! There’s a free version which is free for as long as you want for unlimited users! So yeah. I had never heard of Slack until this past summer, when two projects/jobs I was involved in started using…[Read more]

      • I was about to say this as well, as someone who convinced my office to start using Slack this summer and is now loving it.

        HOWEVER I took another look at the pricing plan and remembered that the free version only archives 10,000 messages, which might be a downside for the AS team. Having access to conversations you had 6+ months ago is pretty…[Read more]

        • Riese replied 1 month ago

          We use Skype now — but it seems like a lot of the features are only accessible with a paid account? And our team has like, a BILLION people in it.

          • We just started using Slack in the office – it’s fantastic. Seriously. It’s chatting, direct messaging, groups, and integrated with a bunch of services, and its free to use for as long as you want to use it with as many users as you want. I particularly like the desktop app that you can download. It pings you when you get a message with an…[Read more]

    • Jo replied 1 month ago

      The Source Of All Things article is heartbreaking.

      • Erin replied 1 month ago

        Honestly I couldn’t bring myself to read it. Not in a good place for it this week. Your comment that it’s heartbreaking only confirms that decision.

      • Riese replied 1 month ago

        I guess it’s a whole book, too…

    • Loved ‘Without You I’m Nothing’, the piece about rock star wives. Create feminist spaces everywhere!

  • ThumbnailWelcome to the first recap of the second season of Faking It, a delightful and horrifying television program from the network that brought you Trailer Fabulous. Last night while I was celebrating my 33rd birthday […]

    • “I would’ve wrapped that sucker in duct tape and then tissue paper and then a boring magazine and then a plastic bag and then probably a burlap sack before disposing of it in a garbage can 25 miles out of town.”

      My girlfriend and I were laughing our heads off the whole time we read this! I’m not sure if I am more excited for faking it to be…[Read more]

    • jane replied 1 month ago

      I think this might be my favorite recap you’ve ever done! Truly, it is a masterpiece.

    • Laura replied 1 month ago

      FINALLY! I was seriously waiting for the recap all day. I tried watching an episode last season and just couldn’t, so for now I’m settling for your recaps and my best friend’s immediate reactions.

      I hated the cliche tv lesbian ending they gave Amy last season, but I am happy where they are going with it. I can relate to her for this, coming out…[Read more]

      • Riese replied 1 month ago

        that is a very apt metaphor

      • Cazz replied 1 month ago

        I was about to post a comment saying basically the same thing. Why cringe through an entire episode when the AS recaps are SOOOOO much better?

        As for Amy I think full blown “what have I done? O.o” rocking in the corner is the only way forward but this is MTV.

    • Wait is Buffalo Exchange a real thing?? Sounds like an extremely important establishment that I should know about.

      • Riese replied 1 month ago

        Yes! It’s like a resale clothing store, the first one I went to was in Williamsburg (Brooklyn) and now I live in Berkeley and there’s one here too. In Michigan they had the same kind of store but it was called Plato’s Closet and also there was a Rag-o-Rama once. So you sell them your lightly worn clothes if they are in perfect condition and…[Read more]

      • Kate replied 1 month ago

        i am sad to report it is a real thing, i was employed there for like two months and it was the fucking WORST

        0/10, would not recommend

    • Aw, Riese, I love how much you care about me and my trans headcanons.

      Also, I just want to make sure that people know that:
      1. Even though I’m embarrassingly sad that Lauren isn’t trans, I’m extremely happy that there’s what so far seems like positive representation for intersex people on TV.

      And 2. I’d actually been praying that she was…[Read more]

    • “But it’s also quite possible that Amy, as a freshly out-to-herself queer with zero lesbian friends, might just genuinely wonder if the fact that she was able to sleep with a boy and not hate it, in and of itself, means that she’s not all-the-way-gay. (It doesn’t.)”

      Amy, sweetie, it took me a couple years (or maybe like 7?) to figure this out. …[Read more]

    • I want a show all about Lauren and Amy. And also, I feel like Karma and Liam have aged 3 years over the summer? What’s up with that?

      • JP replied 1 month ago

        Liam also ~mysteriously got a haircut while in bed with Amy? I hate myself for noticing.

    • this show says lesbians so many times. maybe if it was on when I was in high school I wouldn’t have winced every time I heard the word.


      • Abbey replied 1 month ago

        Somebody needs to do a ‘lesbians’ supercut a la Samuel L Jackson and ‘motherf*cker’…

    • JP replied 1 month ago

      The only way I can get through Faking It episodes is because of the fast forward option. I’m so glad I can skip past Karma’s singing and any scenes with Liam.

    • Is there some place online to watch season one for free?

    • Yay recaps! I’ve missed these!
      Am I the only one that actually likes Karma? I see a lot of 15 year old me in her and I think aside from being a bit hair-brained and not really knowing what she wants she seemed like the most normal/least horrible person in this episode. (Pablo doesn’t count, he’s there to be Lauren and Shane’s shoulder angel and…[Read more]

    • Riese, just, thank you. So much. Thank you so much that I can know what’s happening without having to watch this.

    • Kasey replied 1 month ago


    • Chloe replied 1 month ago

      I’m just relieved someone else shared my outrage re:the plan b box situation

    • Don’t engage in filmed content – but have been doing these recaps all evening. Riese, you make great television!!

    • “But it’s also quite possible that Amy, as a freshly out-to-herself queer with zero lesbian friends, might just genuinely wonder if the fact that she was able to sleep with a boy and not hate it, in and of itself, means that she’s not all-the-way-gay. (It doesn’t.)”

      I think that would be really damaging message given the popular homophobic…[Read more]

      • Riese replied 1 month ago

        I’m not sure what it is in my statement that you’re disagreeing with? where did i say that sleeping with a man would make somebody not gay? i said that amy could very well be 100% gay but could ERRONEOUSLY believe that being able to sleep with a guy is evidence that she’s not 100% gay. i said amy might ERRONEOUSLY believe in the statement you’re…[Read more]

        • Riese, I’m sorry for offending you. I meant that if she ends up as a lesbian (and after Rita Volk’s statement that Amy is gay, anything other would make it the most vicious example of gaybaiting), and it would be implied, or just left unanswered, that she enjoyed sex with the Lesbian Conqueror, then it would suggest what I wrote, perpetuate…[Read more]

      • I think a lot of what Amy is going through in terms of being able to have sex with a guy and not HATE it reflects a lot of what I (and probably many) went through in discovering my sexuality. In a society that doesn’t really talk about how sex should feel emotionally or even physically in a POSITIVE way, I had no idea that my ability to have sex…[Read more]

        • Weez replied 1 month ago

          I agree (and we also don’t know if she liked it or not, but I can’t help but remember her Season 1 metaphors comparing kissing Liam to something pretty good [maybe there was bird involved? I'm blanking] versus the 1000x even-better-than-that kiss with Karma — that resonated with me a lot).

          And I sympathize completely with the need for more…[Read more]

          • I wonder, if it’s “not this story”, then what makes Faking It better than such NBC Dracula?

          • “I agree (and we also don’t know if she liked it or not, but I can’t help but remember her Season 1 metaphors comparing kissing Liam to something pretty good [maybe there was bird involved? I'm blanking] versus the 1000x even-better-than-that kiss with Karma — that resonated with me a lot).”

            That was the exact dialogue:

            Amy: It was like… you…[Read more]

        • Almost the exact same plotline, of lesbian hurt by woman she loved and sleeping with her man, happened not long ago in NBC Dracula. The difference is that Dracula’s creator apologized and said something very important – the lesbian was supposed to look traumatized by the sex, instead during executution of the episode, against the intention of…[Read more]

          • Weez replied 1 month ago

            I guess it’s just hard for me to really come down too hard on it since the show hasn’t told us that Amy liked it. And Amy herself has not yet identified herself as a lesbian, so it feels like we’re judging it based on a comment by the showrunner rather than the story we’re actually seeing, which is that she hasn’t come to that realization fully at…[Read more]

          • Weez, but if she is lesbian (and since Rita Volk said she is, it would be slap in the face if in the end she would turn out to be anything else), then the fact she hasnt’t yet figured it out doesn’t negate anything that happened to that point.

            AE has close relations to the show’s cast since they and MTV belong to the same parent company and…[Read more]

      • I really hate how when you have gay men talking about their sexuality versus lesbians talking about their sexuality, the lesbians have to go above and beyond to validate men. Like they’ll have a gay man kiss/have some form of intimacy with a women and hell be all “Ew.Nope. I’m good. I like the mens.” Whereas they’ll have a lesbian be intimate with…[Read more]

        • Riese replied 1 month ago

          i totally agree with you and i feel like the existence of that double standard is just straight-up misogyny.

          • Weez replied 1 month ago

            And pandering to the male gaze, too. It’s easy not to turn off your straight male viewers by having conventionally beautiful feminine lesbians who also don’t think men are gross. Caters to that fantasy, big-time.

            But they’re sitting pretty with their female viewers, so they can totally have their gay boys be grossed out by the ladies and not…[Read more]

    • My most pressing concern: why doesn’t anyone ever call these things Riese-caps?

    • Tara replied 1 month ago

      i actually really like this show? how it oscillates between really campy and weirdly true to life.

      • Weez replied 1 month ago

        Totally agree. With the whole kidnapping thing, at first I was thinking “Ohhhhh no, that’s not okay” and then I remembered I was not watching realism. Despite many realistic emotions and character arcs and relationship in the larger sense.

        (I mean let’s face it, the very premise — “just be a lesbian and you’re automatically popular!” — is a…[Read more]

      • Riese replied 1 month ago

        yeah i like it! it’s funny and cute.

    • Can we talk about how Amy’s “I have a softball bat under my bed” is the gayest possible response to her mother’s suggestion that she “use protection”?

    • Oh my God SO glad for the recycling joke – my first thought (before WHO is daft enough to leave that kind of thing in the bathroom bin?) was “BUT…BUT…BUT recycling!” :p I think that irked me more than anything else in the episode…

    • Also AfterThought is SUCH an ugly name for emergency contraception :(

    • Does Amy’s mom know that Lauren was born intersex? I’m assuming her dad told her but I don’t know.

  • ThumbnailWelcome to the review and recap of what will hopefully be the first season of Words With Girls, a show created by our very own Brittani Nichols and brought to us here today by ColorCreative.tv, an initiative […]

    • It is important to my health that this show continue.

    • in addition to buying becca a car charger i would also like to petition to buy everyone in the cast some nice pajamas because there was a lot of sleeping in jeans in this episode and it made me sad.

    • I already wrote up all my thoughts and feelings about the pilot in the Open Thread about it (before I read this even). I would just like to say, however, that this was a most excellent and satisfying recap. And also the picture captions were even more amazing than usual.

      I think, Riese, that if you got hired by like The A.V. Club or something…[Read more]

      • Riese replied 1 month ago

        Oh girl, I’m not writing about tv here because I couldn’t get a job doing so elsewhere / haven’t had offers, I’m here because I own this ship to the tune of 80 hours a week, love you weirdos (team and readers alike) and wanna make a difference in this silly world! And possibly because I’m a masochist determined to make my life as complicated as…[Read more]

        • Oh, I took your employability as, you know, an amazing writer to be a given, and I know how much (at least to the extent that you’ve talked about it on the site) of yourself you have put into the miracle that is Autostraddle.

          I was just musing that if it eventually became too much, reading your excellent thoughts in other publications would…[Read more]

    • Wait so in California you can buy whiskey at the grocery store??? That’s amazing.

      Also Riese your captions made the Words With Girls pilot even better which I didn’t know was possible.

    • I am *immediately* in love with this show and all its characters and want it to live forever (or at least to see another episode soon.)

    • I really really need there to be an episode two recap. Meaning I really really need there to be an episode two. Rarely do I enjoy a pilot so much, especially on the very first watch. Yay Brittani!

    • also a v. atmospherically apt Mal Blum song while the airplane whooshes across the night sky.

    • “don’t hate crime me, but also, not welcoming any male suitors.”

      Welp, I think they just described my “look”. Now I feel sad and amused at the same time.

      Which is to say, this show’s comedy is is spot-on.

    • “Pace wants to check and see if Erica got in okay, which always drives me nuts because listen, if her flight did not get in okay, it would be on the news. Whenever a well-meaning friend is like, “text me so I know you got in okay,” I’m like, “if we crash, I’m sure it’ll be on twitter.””


      and oh…[Read more]

    • Liz replied 1 month ago

      just wanted to express my public support for car chargers AND THIS PHENOMENAL RECAP OF THIS PHENOMENAL SHOW!!!

    • “oh, girl.” is right. that shit hit me right in the feels.

    • My girlfriend and I watched this tonight and our favorite part was when Aspen plugs Pace’s phone in after tucking her drunk ass in.
      A) That’s such a good and thoughtful thing for a friend to do!
      B) Also, great writing! If only Aspen’s girlfriend’s had someone with her at that party who cared enough to help her charge her phone.

      Please let…[Read more]

    • I am learning something new about lesbians and it is that we are all pretty interested in phone charging.

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