Listling Without Commentary: Notes Left In My Cabin’s Comments/Questions/Concerns Box

1. I love swinging on PCP

2. Scissoring: Does anybody really do it?

3. Sometimes when I’m alone in the cabin and people come in but don’t acknowledge me, I like to pretend I’m dead. Is that normal?

4. I could really go for an orgasm.

5. Why do I feel feelings?

6. Does U-Haul do group discounts?

7.

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8. My hips don’t lie.

9. Can you take a look at this rash?

10. I want Cheetos plz.

11. Which one of you is the girl?

12. BIRDS! (Caw! Caw!)

13.

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14. Where is Lindsey’s motherfucking clip?

15. I wanna dance with somebody. I wanna feel the heat with somebody.

16. My crotch is buzzing. This is not a question. It is a comment. It is a concern.

17. Can the child within my heart rise above?

18. When I buy potatoes, should I feel bad for the ones I leave behind? Do you think they feel excluded?

19. Can you tell me how to use a dental dam?

20. Can I have a hug?

21. How do I lesbian seckz?

22. Where can I reserve a prom night hotel room?

23. Do you feel like your box has been sufficiently stuffed?

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Brittani

Brittani Nichols is a Los Angeles based comedy person. When she's not tweeting about white people or watching television, she's probably eating pizza. Actually, she's probably doing all three of those things concurrently and when she's not doing THAT, she's sleeping. Brittani also went to Yale and feels weird about mentioning it but wants you to know.

Brittani has written 328 articles for us.

23 Comments

  1. Don’t read #16 while swallowing hot coffee. You may be as unhappy with the result as I was.

    • I feel like all of our notes contained some kind of sexual undertones. Except for the one about potatoes maybe…

  2. I want to be in a long term committed relationship with all of my cabin mates. They are doing human to max and doing it and doing it and doing it well.

  3. Can there be a general listling without commentary of weird things everyone got in their pigeonholes? I didn’t get any messages, but I’m sure there were some fab ones.

Comments are closed.