VIDEO: Julie & Brandy In Your Box Office Episode One – “Avatar”

We are super excitant to present the world premiere of the Autio/Video Autostraddle.com Original Webseries starring famous celesbian comedian of life and star of Logo’s The Big Gay Sketch Show Julie Goldman and phenomenally good-looking actress Brandy Howard, “Julie & Brandy in Your Box Office”! Remember the preview? Wasn’t that awesome? Well now the first episode is here, edited by ME, Riese (Marie Bernard), with help from Autio/Video assistant visionary Kelsey Lisette.

This week, Julie Goldman & Brandy Howard go to see James Cameron’s Avatar. They share all their feelings about it, and then they re-enact the film for you! Their three-minute “Gayvatar” is way better than the real thing! You will probs ROFL 10-27 times.

Julie Goldman and Brandy Howard are the Matt and Ben of Lesbian Movies. Ā They are a sensational acting/writing duo that are trying to cause a sensation with their sensational, lesbian romantic-comedy, Nicest Thing.

Since no one wants to make their movie or cast them in anything, they feel it is their duty to harshly judge everyone elseā€™s work; based on a sliding scale of rage, bitterness, lesbianisim, and lack of any real significant training.

JULIE and BRANDY ā€“ IN YOUR BOX OFFICE.
We see crappy movies so you donā€™t have to.

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You can keep up with Julie Goldman and Brandy Howard’s antics on Julie Goldman’s blog, Julie Goldman is really pretty as well as on Julie & Brandy’s blog It’s Not Gay it’s Fashion and the website for Nicest Thing.

The next episode of In Your Box Office will drop next week, which is very special. From then on out you can expect more LOLs every two weeks!

Before you go! Autostraddle runs on the reader support of our AF+ Members. If this article meant something to you today ā€” if it informed you or made you smile or feel seen, will you consider joining AF and supporting the people who make this queer media site possible?

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87 Comments

  1. this had me smiling in the first 5 seconds, laughing in 30.

    julie goldman is amaaaaaaazing
    “we are the chosen! it’s like we’re jews!”

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  3. seriously this made my day!

    so amazing can’t wait for the next one…

    uh and how cute are you guys seriously thought my computer would explode from the cuteness

  4. Autostraddle wins for getting Julie Goldman in my life every other week… HEEEEY!

    Also, more dogs & cats have made guest appearances on lesbian vlogs/web-series than anywhere else in the interwebland.

  5. I’m waiting for the people who saw and loved Avatar to come out and yell at us. WHERE YOU AT? Taylor Swift?

    • OH! I saw Valentine’s Day this weekend and Swiftdog provided some of the most shiteous overacting I’ve ever seen in my life.

      • Taylor Swift was SO BAD in Valentine’s Day! I think it was purposeful? But I had to cover my eyes when she was on screen. And I just kept thinking “Riese needs to see this, Riese needs to see this, omg.” But also I would never wish such a performance on anyone.

        • Sarah – I was so distracted during her scenes trying to figure out if it was on purpose or not. I get she was supposed to be a Valley girl or whatever, but it was so over-the-top it yanked me out of the movie every time she was on! PS: MOAR Bradley Cooper/Eric Dane.

    • I loved Avatar because it was pretty but I can also see the stupid shit that went on in it.

      THAT’S AS GOOD AS YOU’RE GONNA GET SO SRY

    • also, julie goldman — i dreamed last night that you bought me a whiskey on ice. please confirm / deny the the likelihood of this ever happening.

  6. “Military people are from the south.” Classic. I was so NOT ready for this hilariousness.

    Also, “Lisette” was my girlfriend’s name in French class. So there’s that

  7. As funny as this was i hoped for real dissection of the film, but then you canĀ“t have everything.

    But i liked the film, largely because i was well aware of what kinda movies Cameron makes and heĀ“s good at making those kind of simple, audience friendly(idiot proof) action drama pieces.

  8. Outstanding work my friends.

    other feelings include “this Brandy Howard is nothing like the 6’1″ Brandy Howard from my softball team”

  9. “teach me in a montage of learning!” wonderful. i hated avatar too. these videos are going to make my day every two weeks :)

  10. “its like we are the jews” still laughing about that

    executive lesbian movie realness- hahaha

    this is fantastic.

  11. OH DEAR LORD, your going to get us sued by James Cameron… you know he’s everywhere!

    LOVE IT, but it’s no nicest thing!

  12. I think people either love or hate Avatar depending on their expectations for the film. I liked Avatar enough primarily because the only thing I knew about the movie beforehand was from the trailer. I really didn’t have any expectations. I mean, sure, I’ve seen far better movies that Avatar but I’ve also seen far worse ones too. So I’m not jumping on either bandwagon. Sadly though, it might win the Oscar for Best Picture. That said, everything in the video is so true in addition to being hilarious – I had to momentarily pause it when “Hava Nagila” burst out of nowhere.

  13. If Avatar wins best picture I’m going to have the biggest god damn raging fit since my Alf skate board broke when I was 10.

  14. 1) i love the theme song. Best usage of vocoder ever.
    2) i’m pretty sure Brandy came into my work in Los Feliz once and i developed a mild (see: gargantuan) crush on her. At least my gaydar was on. Too bad im a proverbial pussy.

    • Yeah, I don’t think she is… that’s a shame… her husband wrote the movie they are pushing!

      • no, Julie & Brandy wrote the movie!
        i think that guy did “story” work, but julie & brandy wrote the actual script… when you read it, it’s very clearly a Julie Goldman joint.

  15. The future is now! And it’s really funny!
    (But if they keep talking politics, I might kill my computer at some point.)

  16. this is so funny. nothing could have prepared me for how funny this is.

    i have so many favourite parts, but “i take off my glove” was my most favourite part in the preview and my most favourite part in the whole thing. because wow, so funny.

    i am going to watch this again now.

    THANK YOU AUTOSTRADDLE!

  17. ABSOLUTELY HILARIOUS. nice work, la-la-ladies.
    this is a genius partnership – julie/brandy and auto. YES.

  18. avatar = pocahontas x the matrix + KILLING OFF MICHELLE RODRIGUEZ.

    that is the only part of the movie i was emotionally tied to.

  19. I started laughing roughly 20 seconds in and literally could not STOP LAUGHING til the end.

    More of this please. It is good.

    • ME TOO. I CAN’T GET OUT IT OUT OF MY HEAD. I’ve been singing Avatar Avatar mm badaleheyeee ah avatarrrr

  20. “I love a language that makes you think they’re going to throw up on you at any second”

    • Hahah! That was my favorite part too. I loved whenever she said the tribe name or spoke in their language.

  21. Just wondering, does anyone know if Brandy Howard is gay? I’m curious cause she’s just reallyyyyy super fine :D

  22. That video is hilarious. Julie Goldman has always been one of my favorite comedians. I saw the “In your box office” they did for The proposal a little too late and wasted my money on that movie.

  23. 1. Genius
    2. I did appreciate AVATAR for what is was worth cinematically but as far as plot and political/cultural POV it was kind of… frivolous
    3. I’ll totally be looking forward to more “In your box office”

  24. “It sounds like they’re about to throw up at any minute.”

    How I love Julie Goldman, let me count the ways…

  25. Ok, I’m gonna count my rofls. One down and I just finished the theme song alone! “in… your… BOX OFFICE! (another-word-for-vagina! huugh!” HA!
    #2. Julie is singing “avataaar.”
    #3. “it’s me, julie, and brandy!”

    Pause, omg she’s so right about the $500 mill. I mean I saw this movie as something finally calling the truth to light; through (science) fiction. But with that money they could have helped people already in danger. So what’s better? A message millions of people have seen (and probably haven’t processed enough to put into action) or a the deed itself (which probably no one would have known about)? That’s a real thinker.

    #4. “How DARE you, sir? How DARE you?!”
    #5. “WE’RE MAD ABOUT 9/11! BLUE PEOPLE!”
    #6. “My brother’s dead! I don’t know what I’m gon do! My legs don’t work!”
    #7. “Make me a part of the ewjsgfdszfdsffd tribe!”
    #8. “Then I’m gon put my tail in it!” *weird face*
    #9. “We’re chosen. It’s like we’re jews.”
    #10. “I like these blue people. They’re nice. The ladies. All the junk’s out. My junk’s out flappin’ around.”
    #11. “Everybody! Everyboddaaaayy!”
    #12. (THE BIGGES ROFL OF THEM ALL) The whole entire song Julie sings at the end. Genius.

    See, 12. You were right.

  26. Is there any chance there could be alternative versions of these videos with subtitles for those who are hard of hearing? They are extremely awesome and a transcription of them would only add to their awesomeness. xx

  27. This cracked my shit up. I thought Avatar was ridiculous, and it totally robbed “Coraline” of best 3D film. I didn’t make a lot of those modern day Afghanistan connections to the film though. Mine all went back to the Trail of Tears, and I kept wondering why Cameron insisted on ending the movie on an upbeat note.

    My favorite part of this was when they were talking about how it would be an honor to translate, because yeah, that part of the movie was too funny.

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