Idol Worship: A Hand-Curated Betty White GIF Therapy Post

Welcome to Idol Worship, a biweekly devotional to whoever the fuck I’m into. This is a no-holds-barred lovefest for my favorite celebrities, rebels and biker chicks; women qualify for this column simply by changing my life and/or moving me deeply. This week, I’m really glad the Internet likes Betty White like I like Betty White.

Header by Rory Midhani

Seeing as I was born with the natural style, grace, and attitude of an older woman, it’s no surprise that I used to stay up nights to marathon Golden Girls episodes in my bedroom as a wee lass. And seeing as I grew up watching The Golden Girlsit’s no surprise that I’ve turned out the way I did.

tumblr_lytxrqxR841r8voh0o1_500

It was hard to pick a favorite character on GG growing up, mostly because I wanted to grow up to be every single old lady on Earth. I admired each of the four leading ladies: Sophia, who reminds me of my own grandmother, was too feisty not to leave me awestruck; Dorothy, whom I always knew, deep down, I really was, was too intelligent to disparage; Blanche, sexy and smooth, was everything I hoped I could be when I was her age. And despite my extreme, all-encompassing fear of ending up clueless and naïve, I loved Rose Nylund.

At first glance, Rose, a caricature of midwestern unknowing and small-town simplicity, seems to exist only for comic relief. She gets herself into messes, and she often doesn’t even realize what she’s done, but fuck if I didn’t laugh every. single. time. And on second and third glance, I realized Rose, in all of her childlike innocence, was quite a feisty motherf*cker herself. And that – well. That I truly, deeply loved.

tumblr_miarerjkzf1r2jnbbo1_500

Rose was experienced, and authentic, and genuine. She was well-meaning, totally kind, and absolutely pure. She had strength of character and she had a strong moral core. And none of this is influenced by the fact that when I took a quiz that assigns you to your Golden Girls soul twin, I landed Rose despite trying my best to avoid every nice answer on the damn thing.

Betty White, the last Golden Girl standing, the mother of all Rose, had a career more expansive than a small Miami kitchen and a fresh cheesecake, though. And even growing up, I recognized that of all the other actresses, she was the most public. I saw her speaking out on gay rights and animal rights, I saw her hosting SNL and sitting in my living room during commercial breaks, and I knew then that the joke had been on me the whole time. Rose was nothing to avoid. Betty White was, and is, no fool. And her ability to morph so well into all of her various characters, as well as her tenacity and never-ending presence on The Scene, was something I admired and still admire deeply as a teenage drama queen. (No, but seriously. I went to performing arts school, you guys. I was gonna make it.)

But I digress.

tumblr_m5x2oeWPzB1r6gk4zo1_500

My love for the Golden Girls aside, it’s hard not to love Betty White. She’s really just simply amazing, and her ability to laugh at her own expense and portray strong, edgy, and hilarious characters above 30 is a standout art in today’s 20-something media landscape. Plus, I’m pretty sure, upon further inspection, that she really is my soul twin.

tumblr_lxyx4iyz1C1qbjwvqo1_500

Funny women are hard to find. This isn’t because they don’t exist; I know from personal experience that most women are hilarious, after all (especially B), and that most men aren’t. But in Hollywood, and especially in visual mediums like television and film, it can be hard to find a woman at all, let alone a priceless gem of a comedic one. In that way, Betty White’s done swimmingly, and deserves pretty much for all of us to bow down before her. She takes herself seriously as a comedian, and hasn’t given up despite having celebrated a 90th birthday and being the butt of pretty much every “Keep Betty Alive” joke on the Internet. You can tell Betty White knows she’s funny, and you can tell she enjoys how ingrained into all of us that one fact is, too. And I ain’t even mad, because that bitch is one-of-a-fucking-kind.

My biggest fears with growing old, as a wee lass at least, all stemmed from social anxieties: How will I meet people? Will there be stuff for me to do? What do old people WEAR? How do they keep drinking? Will I be forced to marry some boring dude, start a family, and then cook big meals? WHAT IS HAPPENING. The Golden Girls did a lot to assuage those kinds of fears in us all; in the middle of a 90’s media firestorm of midriff tops and spandex, they showed America and the world that women, at any age, could be sexy, confident, and funny. They could spar with words, deliver witty and timely snark, and throw a comeback at any dude who dared offend them. And that was pretty badass, if you ask me.

Now that I’m all grown up (or at least too old to trick-or-treat, too young to die), my only fear is walking into a room of women, at some point in this wild journey, who don’t know The Golden Girls by word and don’t think of those four women as having raised them by TV light. Luckily, the entire internet fawns over the cast enough to keep historians puzzling over the population of St. Olaf for centuries; in addition to GG memes, White’s also had a streak of luck in the Tumblrverse and remains one of its most cherished treasures.

In honor of my strong feelings about her, I wanted to compile an assortment of Betty Whit GIFs, both in character and just in lounge wear, to showcase more accurately every dimension of her personality. In the process, I learned a lot.

1. Sometimes, a girl’s gotta drink.

tumblr_mt9itptffp1rk35mno1_500

tumblr_inline_mtc9q234Dd1rgdnj0

tumblr_inline_mf75f8Wr6W1rao0jp

bettywhite

tumblr_ly2t22HV2k1qjm5x9o5_500

2. Sometimes, she can’t.

tumblr_mbtoxl7Efb1rvo8ws

giphy-1

3. I’ll never be too old for Vegas.

giphy-4

…or to shake what my mama gave me.

tumblr_inline_mq4upgKbEm1qz4rgp

giphy-7

…or for sexy times overall.

tumblr_inline_mu7ju3rTQY1rhignx

tumblr_ml25349oQB1r2jnbbo1_500

tumblr_mbtq3o8TrI1rvo8ws

tumblr_mv291kPqUn1qk08n1o1_500

tumblr_lyy8h0qxMq1qax7vro1_400

4. No matter how many years it’s been, you can expect it to still be just you and your ego.

tumblr_m4m6llFzVU1qzkl82o1_500

…so don’t be afraid to self-promote.

tumblr_mbtoyaf3WY1rvo8ws

giphy-8

5. We all have hard lives.

tumblr_mo99bfAFAl1r2jnbbo1_500

tumblr_mo90q8HesM1qgfdhto1_250

giphy-6

6. And that’s just the way it is.

tumblr_lxxdl3MeYQ1r35wfvo1_400

7. No matter what, remember: this is how we live, no fucks to give.

tumblr_m5plowE3XJ1qlihc2o1_400

(So always speak your mind.)

tumblr_mom9vcVJWF1r2jnbbo1_500

tumblr_mqkvdgkUQ11svtljbo1_500

8. Do the right thing…

giphy-2

and don’t be afraid to stand up for your principles…

tumblr_mpqhjwWwKM1rqu3aso1_r1_500

tumblr_mbtpgu3C8h1rvo8ws

…no matter what the cost.

giphy-5

tumblr_m5otrq8sOy1rrsmaw

tumblr_mk31en7h4c1rf5bj0o1_500

9. Never forget your fans. 

giphy-3

tumblr_m8itz71xD51qe0g82

betty-white-kisses-gif

10. And never change a good thing.

giphy

Before you go! Autostraddle runs on the reader support of our AF+ Members. If this article meant something to you today — if it informed you or made you smile or feel seen, will you consider joining AF and supporting the people who make this queer media site possible?

Join AF+!

Carmen

Carmen spent six years at Autostraddle, ultimately serving as Straddleverse Director, Feminism Editor and Social Media Co-Director. She is now the Consulting Digital Editor at Ms. and writes regularly for DAME, the Women’s Media Center, the National Women’s History Museum and other prominent feminist platforms; her work has also been published in print and online by outlets like BuzzFeed, Bitch, Bust, CityLab, ElixHER, Feministing, Feminist Formations, GirlBoss, GrokNation, MEL, Mic and SIGNS, and she is a co-founder of Argot Magazine. You can find Carmen on Twitter, Instagram and Tumblr or in the drive-thru line at the nearest In-N-Out.

Carmen has written 919 articles for us.

14 Comments

  1. I didn’t pay too much attention to reruns of The Golden Girls growing up, but now I can’t get enough of Rose’s “Back in St. Olaf…” stories, her child-like naivety and her less frequent, yet perfectly timed sassy comebacks, much to Dorothy, Blanche and Sophia’s chagrin. Thank you for being a friend, Betty White!

  2. I came to Golden Girls late in the game, having discovered them the summer I finished grad school. There really isn’t anything else on TV I’d rather watch than a marathon of Golden Girls reruns.

  3. my first year of college, about 10 friends and i had a nightly ritual of meeting at one friend’s dorm room every night at eleven to watch one full hour of golden girls on lifetime before returning to our homework. this happened every night without fail, regardless of exam situations, and it was a really strange thing for a bunch of 17-18-year-old kids to bond over, but jesus christ i wanted to be sophia petrillo so badddddddd. i hope when we are old and still the worst, we are just like the golden girls.

  4. I don’t know how often the Gameshow Network shows older games shows anymore (. . . or if there even still is a Gameshow Network, come to think of it), but if you get a chance, you must must MUST look out for Betty White playing Match Game or Password or Pyramid. As funny and great of an actress as she is, those appearances really show you how whip-smart and funny she is in real life.

  5. you are really a excellent webmaster. The site
    loading speed is incredible. It kind of feels that you are doing
    any distinctive trick. Also, The contents
    are masterpiece. you have performed a great job in this topic!

Comments are closed.