Autostraddle Reader Survey 2011: Talk to Us (It’s Multiple Choice)

Hello bold beasts of the future! Look at you! You have the world cradled in the palms of your capable little hands. Where will we buy our frozen yogurt and hoodies? What books will we read after the apocalypse? Will we ever get over Hoarders? The answers to these questions — and many more! — are right there in your heart. You just don’t know it yet!

In order to cull this priceless information from the death grip of your subconscious, we have devised a very clever plan:

Autostraddle Reader Survey 2011

*click to participate*

The masterbrains of Autostraddle dot com wish to know you better. We’ve read your comments and updates and blogs and tumblrs and tweets, mhm, but what of your deepest, most anonymous truths? How did you first make your way here? Are you the only one of your kind or is there more of you? Can you make decent baklava? No probably not.

But we’ll never know unless you complete this fancy-yet-straightforward Autostraddle Reader Survey!

You’ll fill it out, right? Of course you will. People love talking and thinking about themselves! This survey should take you all of about three minutes to complete, possibly less. Look, it’s a picture of Tegan and Sara and a puppet:

you probably love this sort of thing, but how will i ever know for sure?

Nothing would please me more than you completing this survey. It’s 100% anonymous and so easy, even your straight-girl crush’s boyfriend could do it!

JUST KIDDING he doesn’t read Autostraddle. (Unless he does in which case HAY TAKE OUR SURVEY) But you do! And so you’re very important to us and the future.

Do you have questions or concerns regarding this survey? Let us know about them in the comments! We’re always here, reading what you have to say, because we just can’t get enough of you.

Before you go! Autostraddle runs on the reader support of our AF+ Members. If this article meant something to you today — if it informed you or made you smile or feel seen, will you consider joining AF and supporting the people who make this queer media site possible?

Join AF+!

Riese

Riese is the 41-year-old Co-Founder of Autostraddle.com as well as an award-winning writer, video-maker, LGBTQ+ Marketing consultant and aspiring cyber-performance artist who grew up in Michigan, lost her mind in New York and now lives in Los Angeles. Her work has appeared in nine books, magazines including Marie Claire and Curve, and all over the web including Nylon, Queerty, Nerve, Bitch, Emily Books and Jezebel. She had a very popular personal blog once upon a time, and then she recapped The L Word, and then she had the idea to make this place, and now here we all are! In 2016, she was nominated for a GLAAD Award for Outstanding Digital Journalism. She's Jewish and has a cute dog named Carol. Follow her on twitter and instagram.

Riese has written 3164 articles for us.

111 Comments

  1. Choosing between wine, beer and spirits = hardest test ever.

    Also, tenuous reference to the childlike empress = amazing.

  2. Also, if we all lie and say we’re millionaires, will people pay you more to advertise?

    • :/

      I’m always too honest on this type of thing. I wish I realized that was what was happening. I should have said I was an uber-rich hyper-consumer, right? I have the same problem on those online job application personality tests.

      • I feel like this isn’t specifically for advertisers, and they’d really rather know the truth.

      • Oh shit. Should’ve read the comments before I completed the survey. I listed my real income. Oopsie.

    • I like all the clicking in surveys. It’s like a point and click video game.

      Let’s do this time capsule annually. :p

  3. So I hope you know I took this survey because of the picture of the Childlike Empress and Bastian.

  4. Can I add something to the “what do you want to see more in Autostraddle”?

    A resident cat (or other pet) model. Then you can dress it up or make it pose however you like. For posts I mean. Mascot! Unless Tinkerbell is already the mascot.

  5. Even though this post claims to have been written by “the team,” I just wanted to say that it feels a lot like Rachel wrote it. I don’t know why but it’s interesting to think about.

    Also, will you publish the demographic information when the survey closes and you’ve had time to look at it? I know I’d be interested to see, and am not sure what the harm is, unless you have to do tons more work to make it happen.

  6. Last night, I had an nightmare about Autostraddle; I bought a magazine version of AS and was reading it at the top flour of a large, white building, in the middle of a park (NYC style) and I bumped into a group of very homophobic friends of mine, and they realized that I was reading a gay magazine, and they chased me down the building and around the park.

    So please, never do a print version of AS…

        • Well, I *was* going to say get a Maxim, but that’s just as eyebrow-raising as a gay magazine. I don’t know what people read these days…but if it’s a magazine that isn’t a cause for embarrassment then I’d probably end up reading it instead of the gay magazine inside. Conflicted.

    • I had a dream about Autostraddle last night too! I was taking a test on “The Sound and the Fury” and all I could think for answers were things I read on Autostraddle, and some of the questions I just put the word “autostraddle.” I woke up before it was over but I probably got an A++.

  7. I make decent baklava, but my friend makes it better. Going to go do the survey now…

  8. now I feel bad because the site I visit most is facebook, though I wanted it to be zeit.de (politics and culture for the most part) or kicker.de (sports, at least sports). :(

    • I totally forgot about Facebook when I was asked that. Facebook feels like it’s part of life and not a website I visit. How creepy is that? But I don’t know if it changes my answer. Facebook and my answer are probably tied.

    • yeah…and we don’t even need to put a pepto-pink sticker on it to emphasize that we’re lgbtq or allies, it’s already “queered” :) #doublepoints

  9. Autostraddle surveys are the best surveys because they have all the right options for answering questions, like genderqueer and poly and queer!
    SO MUCH BETTER THAN NORMAL SURVEYS.

  10. Which word would you use to describe Autostraddle?
    Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious!

  11. I LOVE taking surveys for some reason. It’s probably because it makes me feel like I’m doing something selfless and helping someone when I’m really just giving my opinions/talking about ME ME ME. Anyways, this was definitely one of my favorite surveys to take.

    • i think i’ve taken like 20 marketing surveys because i just want to talk about myself

      • This. They always say if you want people to like you, just ask THEM questions about THEMSELVES. Any opportunity I have to talk about my opinions and why I have them is great. I’m pretty sure I over-comment online. It makes up for me being shy in person, I guess.

  12. I wish there was a question on the survey asking if we wanted more surveys. The answer would be yes. I vote for monthly surveys. I like that you value our input. And they amuse me.

  13. I skim-read ‘the masterbrains of autostraddle’ as ‘the masturbators of autostraddle’ and had to scan back to read it properly…

  14. I clicked on this thinking it was going to be mostly about what kinds of stories readers are most interested in reading. There’s a little of that, but it is so clearly primarily about product placement, and market research. I get that autostraddle is a combination of activist-oriented articles as well as the fluffier commercial stuff, but really? This is a little gross. Autostraddle has the potential to be a great example of what the internet can do for the queer community: letting people from communities all over the world share their stories and experiences and feel connected. Please don’t devolve into a cheap, corporate brat trying to be alternative and edgy while selling me designer shoes and expensive tequila! Keep autostraddle feisty, insightful, and full of conversation. It means a lot to us kids in isolated places trying to reach out to the global community.

    • that’s a beautiful thought and all, but in reality how is a website to survive these days without running a few ads? I don’t mind a little advertising as long as it stays true to autostraddle.

      I guess if bad comes to worse there’s always bake sales and care washes.

    • come on. how long is your memory? remember that big funding drive like 5 minutes ago? the wonderful team behind this wonderful place need bucks to keep it going. I reckon you’re drawing a long bow to get from some audience stats to shilling expensive tequila.

    • I don’t understand why talking about activism and edgy stuff while wearing designer shoes and drinking expensive tequila is a problem. The whole “being poor is cool” hipster thing is BS, and I’ve noticed that the people who bitch about money and other people needing money the most are the ones who never had to worry about being able to eat tomorrow once in their lives.
      If you want to read more cool stories on Autostraddle, you have to be supportive of Autostraddle getting the money to publish said stories.

      • Right, bloggers need to eat too, site needs adverts to stay up, and part of “girl-on-girl” culture includes consumption, shopping habits… But maybe be more upfront about the purposes of this survey, and have another one that does ask for more personalized reader input? I don’t think it was an awful survey, just would be far more interested in something that asks for more detailed input on content. Feels a little shitty being asked about yourself… and then being directed to a multiple choice about your online shopping habits. We’re more than a preferred brand of beer or an amazon wishlist.

        • alls im saying is it’s one survey. just one, and how much awesome info has autostraddle given us? and it’s not like it’s going to spam our email or anything

          p.s. wouldn’t amazon be worse since it tracks you online, it actually tracks you on this site too (get ghostery if you want to block it)

        • we sorta thought we made that clear in the post, but i can change the post to make it more clear that this is for advertising/marketing purposes.

          we aren’t at a crisis with content or site composition. we’re happy with the site right now and the amount of feedback/discourse we already have with you. if we weren’t happy with site content or felt you were unhappy, we’d definitely make a survey to find out how we could better serve you. this is not that survey. we asked questions about content on that survey, however, because we want to know anyhow and this seemed like a good time to ask and it will help us grow, too.

          we ARE at a crisis with marketing/advertising/sustainable business model. this survey aims to solve that problem. that’s the point. your shopping habits aren’t a part of girl-on-girl culture, in my opinion. but they are a part of the kind of information we need to approach marketers.

          I’m not going to apologize for trying to find a sustainable advertising-based business model to keep the site running and growing without begging y’all for money all the time. I think you’ll all be happy when we create a sustainable business model and see all the other amazing things we want to do but haven’t had the resources to do yet. This survey is a part of that process. It is what it is.

          • YES! As an nonprofit employee myself (not that you’re a nonprofit, but let’s be honest…), I am sick to death of well-meaning but clueless people shaming those of us who have to spend our time asking them for money in order to fund our own tiny salaries. As a socialist and a pretty radical feminist, I think one of the most radical things one can do is help the economies you care about to flourish. And another radical thing is getting a corporation to give advertising money to a lesbian media outlet that remains unabashedly feminist in all of its content. No, really. I think advertising money in Autostraddle’s hands really is that important. Economics are NEVER separate from social justice movements and we’ve got to own our role in said movement.

            The Think Global Buy Local is an excellent example of this modern incarnation, as are historical and current Black nationalists doing it with Black-owned bookstores and shops (see Malcolm X for a primer). A really great scholarly book on the subject is Incite’s “The Revolution Will Not Be Funded.” Seriously, this book is some good shit compiled by a dope women-of-color feminist collective.

            http://www.amazon.com/Revolution-Will-Not-Funded-Non-Profit/dp/0896087662

            I’m not saying we’ve all got to buy whatever is advertised on this site, but the very least we can do is help Autostraddle approach the advertisers that may eventually pay for the editors’ health insurance.

            Ok, end rant. Can anyone tell I’m in fundraising season right now and I may have overdosed on this topic…:)

          • Yes, I was thinking it should link through your thing but I didn’t know how. Thanks!

            Also can we please bring back LIVING LA VIDA LOCA? I’m gonna get on that real quick.

          • THIS IS IT

            “I’m not going to apologize for trying to find a sustainable advertising-based business model to keep the site running and growing without begging y’all for money all the time. I think you’ll all be happy when we create a sustainable business model and see all the other amazing things we want to do but haven’t had the resources to do yet. This survey is a part of that process. It is what it is.”

          • How abouts some Autostraddle clothing? I mean, I love the sticker and calendar. But I wouldn’t be adverse to a t-shirt. Or coughunderwearcough.

            :)

      • THIS

        (this “THIS” was supposed to reference GV’s comment, but now it’s just hanging out in threadspace)

    • well! actually, the point of the survey is to help us attract advertisers who are right for our brand. so yes, most of the questions are marketing questions. these are the same marketing-style surveys that every major website and magazine conduct in order to create their media kit. we just haven’t done it yet.

  15. Please make a listing without commentary article of the words people used to describe Autostraddle. I feel like it would be entertaining.

  16. even though this feels much like a survey for advertisers, I love surveys and I love autostraddle, so I’ll do it for you, autostraddle.

  17. oh no! my girlfriend filled out the survey and now i can’t because we have the same computer/ip address. is there any way to fill out the survey without finding a different computer?

  18. Wait, what if I am taking the survey while eating frozen yogurt and wearing a hoodie? Is someone standing in my yard watching?

  19. The describe-your-sexuality question was the most satisfying survey question I’ve ever answered. So beautifully, customisably comprehensive :) I don’t even care if it’s going into a giant marketing machine…

  20. My assumption is that this is market research, but I’d enjoy hearing some AS facts when it’s all said and done! Actually, the one I am most curious about is the ONE word everyone chose to describe Autostraddle. My guess is “gay” ranks pretty high. It seemed like a hard question when I read it but then a word came to me instantly that I thought was perfect. Hope you take it the right way. :)

  21. done annnnd done!

    I’ve been trying to do an internet cleanse (I’m obvs failing) I miss you autostraddle!!

  22. I think it would have been cool if a relationship could be polyamorous and serious/long term at the same time.

    • You know, it seems this site attracts such an open-minded and diverse group that everything regarding sexuality and relationships offends or irritates at least someone. I seem to accidentally do it a couple times a month. When I took the survey — any survey — I wanted to offer more specific answers because I know sometimes they seem one way but the backstory is another way. I just pick the one the matches best and move on. If someone were in a serious, long term polyamorous relationship, I am pretty sure they know which box they should be checking. If not, maybe surveys with checkboxes aren’t for them. I’m just saying.

      • Well said. I’m not legally married (doesn’t count for shit in my country) but we had a fancy wedding a few months ago and the law here considers us “de facto” spouses, so… good enough.

  23. I was sold when multiple choice was mentioned. It’s brings out the nostalgia for standardized tests without all the stress (except for the alcohol question, so hard to pick between vodka, rum, and whiskey).

    • They did not offer me a girly mixed drink, so I had to choose whiskey, and silently vow to add blackberry liqueur.

  24. It just now dawned on me that you used a picture from The Neverending Story. Hahahaha.

  25. This is really the only survey I’ve ever been fully invested in. I always start out with good intentions and then fall asleep by the middle of the survey since they tend to be super long and boring.

  26. I can’t decide who was my first crush…the Childlike Empress or that puppet chick from The Dark Crystal.

  27. All this survey did was make me realize things about myself that I hadn’t realized. Like the fact that I can’t afford to do anything it’s asking about (watching tv, drinking, purchasing things) lol
    Hopefully the results get posted :)

  28. I’m sorry guys, you surveyed my inebriated mind accidentally. I filled this out while pretty faced.

    The only thing I remember with clarity is answering the liquor question, where I confusedly tried very hard to click all of them at once.

  29. I didn’t read the post until after I took the survey. I just saw survey and went for it. Therefore, I answered honestly. And unfortunately was too daft to realize it was for marketing purposes. So, sorry if I fucked up.
    My word was effervescent.

Comments are closed.