Are Male Role Models Necessary?

One of the primary arguments made against same-sex marriage is that children suffer without a same-sex “role model” as a parent — that sons without fathers won’t undergo proper gender socialization and consequently will turn out psychologically maladjusted and maybe even also homosexual! Now we have a study from The Williams Institute that may help debunk that theory, “Adolescents of the U.S. National Longitudinal Lesbian Family Study: Male Role Models, Gender Role Traits, and Psychological Adjustment.

Lead author Henny Bos of the University of Amsterdam and her team felt that “the concern that children with same-sex parents suffer from inadequate gender socialization is based on an erroneous assumption that these children are exposed only to adults of a single gender,” and that it was important to also look at the psychological adjustment of children who, despite having two female parents, managed to socialize and form bonds with other male human beings throughout their fascinating lives on this diverse special planet.

this boy is really happy to have a dad he can play dinosaurs with

The researchers’ interest in this topic was partially motivated by a 2007 study entitled “Lesbian mothers’ ideas and intentions about male involvement across the transition to parenthood” (Goldberg & Allen), which interviewed 30 lesbian couples during pregnancy and again at three months and found that more than two-thirds of the mothers were concerned about the absence of a male figure in their child’s life.

“I’ve always felt pretty indignant about the “need” for male role models in the lives of young boys,” Laneia, a lesbian mother of two boys, told me. Laneia’s kids spend the school year with her and summers with their Dad (her ex-husband), across the country. “But then there was usually a little tug of worry or guilt in the back of my mind, like I was probably fucking something up by not having more men around. Being a parent is lots of worry and guilt though, so this is normal. But now what I’m understanding is that really I just need to make sure they have a variety of personalities and interests and goals and experiences to try on or hear about or come to understand.”

This is in line with some of what Goldberg & Allen found in their study of pregnant lesbians:

“When asked why they thought that male role models were important for their children, some women indicated that children should be exposed to a diverse range of people of different genders, sexual orientations, races, and ethnicities.”

Goldberg & Allen also found some women simply wished their children would have good relationships with males similar to their own relationships with their own fathers and that some felt “heteronormative social pressure.”

Were their concerns well-founded? That’s where Bos’s study comes in. They looked at 78 teenagers (50-50 male/female) who’d been raised by lesbian parents were asked about their relationships with male role models and about their identification with traits stereotypically defined as “masculine” or “feminine.” Their psychological well-being was also tracked by assessing reported rates of depression, anxiety and anger, among other unpleasantries. Also worth mentioning: the study sample group was almost entirely white (87%) and mostly middle-to-upper class (81%), which makes any broad-level conclusion-drawing impossible.

The results showed that the gender of one’s parents and the presence of same-sex role models (whether it’s a parent or an external party) had no relationship whatsoever to the kids’ identification with certain gender roles or overall psychological adjustment.

Girls obviously were more likely to identify with the lady-traits and both genders were equally likely to identify with the so-called masculine traits. The only notable difference in outcome for any of their questions was that girls were more anxious than boys, which I think we can easily blame on the patriarchy.

From their conclusions:

“We found no empirical evidence that the associations between gender role traits and adolescent psychological well-being were different for girls and boys, or for those with or without male role models. These findings contradict the claims of scholars who, based on social learning theory, assert that male role models, particularly for boys, play a critical role in the development of healthy psychological well-being.”

So there you have it — according to this study, the health and gender socialization of boys is not harmed by the absence of a male parent.

both of the boys in this photo feel really good about being boys

After the dubious same-sex parenting study that came out two weeks ago, this particular study has been greeted with open arms, which honestly feels slightly bizarre. Are we really excited that lesbians are capable of raising boys with proper “gender socialization”? ‘Cause from what I’ve read, it’s generations upon generations of properly socialized boys that have created this weird dysfunctional civilization we currently live in. But regardless, it’s not the fact that we’re looking at proper male socialization that surprised me about the overwhelmingly positive reaction to this study, it’s that we were touting our ability to execute “proper” gender socialization in the first place.

As the researchers point out in their introduction, “An underlying assumption of social learning theory is that developing adequately gendered behavior is important in its own right and is a necessary end in itself.” 

It’s an erroneous and dangerous assumption to make. But before that assumption is made, we’ve already predicated the entire conversation on the idea that the so-called absent-father epidemic can be fixed by social change and that therefore female same-sex couples are in a unique position to further or cease the “problem.” (Or that fatherless families didn’t exist before lesbians made their own.) For many families, getting Dad back home would require resuscitating a dead body or facilitating a prison break (1.6 million kids in this country have fathers in prison), and in any event, 23% of the nation’s family households are headed by single mothers.

Furthermore, studies that tout the supreme psychological well-being of children with a father in the house render themselves nearly meaningless by ignoring causation — is it really that children with fathers at home are less likely to be abused or take drugs, or is that the types of fathers who stick around are the ones who are more likely to be supportive, caring forces? (Rebecca Ryan’s study on “The Moderating Influence of Marriage Prosperity” has a lot to say about this.) Is it fair to come down hard on single mothers in a society where women aren’t given the same employment concessions and opportunities as men? Unstable fatherless homes don’t exist in a vacuum. These studies tend to be used to condemn single motherhood, absent fathers or same-sex parents rather than what they should be used for, which is to condemn the legal, economic, public health and tax policies that exclude non-traditional families and erase transgender parents altogether. Not to mention that there’s an increasing body of research debunking ideas about traditional families’ inherent superiority in the first place.

this baby is overjoyed that she’s being raised by a single mother with such nice bangs

Gender socialization is one of many elements of family life we’ve been bred to see as “essential” when in truth, gender socialization in and of itself has never met the needs of the individual, only the larger system which benefits those already in power. It’s unsurprising that the bulk of gender socialization research, then, is focused on maintaining the masculinity of boys and men, as Bos’s study points out: “Embedded within this longstanding critique of single-gender parenting  is a substantially greater concern for the well-being of fatherless boys than motherless girls, as reflected in the sheer volume of research on the former and relatively little data on the latter.” How girls turn out isn’t, I guess, quite so crucial.

Rather than figuring out how best to assimilate into said status quo, queer parents are in a unique position to challenge the gender norms that necessitate this kind of conversation in the first place; conversations which benefit all types of families. It’s fundamentally irritating that lesbians even have to prove they’re able to raise men as men  — we should truly only be held accountable for raising people as people. 

But many members of the queer community feel we must celebrate studies like this one because obtaining equal rights means fighting for them within a system that doesn’t necessarily reflect the needs or substance of our community. Our enemies are playing baseball, and if we show up dressed for Roller Derby, they’re not gonna let us play. If we wanna beat them in court and at the ballot box, it’s important for us to have comebacks to claims that children raised in queer families lack same-sex role models or traditional gender socialization.

this photograph represents a happy family of beaming human beings

But I hope I’m not alone in wishing that once we get through this part — the part where many among us feel pressure to appear “just like everybody else” in order to gain legal rights — that we can emerge on the other side with our special snowflakeness intact. As Jane Ward explains in Queer Parenting For Heteros (& anyone else who wants to teach kids that being queer is awesome), there are many things hets can learn from queer parents, like our amazing ability to delink “masculinity” and “femininity” from their accordant cisgender male and female bodies.

“Gender has a way of becoming important thanks to society and gender policing,” says Laneia. “Maybe the women in your kids’ lives don’t know anything about asserting themselves on a team or changing a flat tire because they were raised and conditioned to think they either didn’t have to or couldn’t know those things. It seems like the best way to flip that kind of conditioning on its ass is to actively seek out people who challenge gender norms by having experiences outside the heteronormative binary. LIKE QUEER PEOPLE.”

Profile photo of Riese

Riese is the 33-year-old CEO, CFO and Editor-in-Chief of Autostraddle.com as well as an award-winning writer, blogger, fictionist, copywriter, video-maker and aspiring cyber-performance artist who grew up in Michigan, lost her mind in New York City, and now lives in The Bay Area. Her work has appeared in nine books including "The Bigger the Better The Tighter The Sweater: 21 Funny Women on Beauty, Body Image & Other Hazards Of Being Female," magazines including Marie Claire and Curve, and all over the web including Nerve, Bitch, Emily Books and Jezebel. She had a very popular personal blog once upon a time, and then she recapped The L Word, and then she had the idea to make this place, and now here we all are!

Riese has written 1781 articles for us.

34 Comments

  1. Thumb up 5

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    I think the thing that’s also often left out of these conversations is that fathers are all different! My dad stayed at home with us while my mom worked–what did that teach my sister and I about proper gender socialization? I feel like it’s mostly just important that kids (and everyone, really) have significant close relationships with different people, not just their parents.

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    I kept thinking of comments as I was reading this and as I read further my thoughts were covered. Very comprehensive article!

    Ultimately I think you’ve summed it up well with this:

    “we should truly only be held accountable for raising people as people.”

    This should render the gender of the parents irrelevant, providing the parents are, you know, people too.
    Unfortunately, I find it really depressing to know that this argument will not even register with the general population – I can’t even think of anyone in my life who would buy it.

    Which as you said, makes studies like this important as it shows people who are “OTHERS” can raise children who are “NORMAL”. Which seems to be a good thing.

  3. Thumb up 17

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    because we all know how good traditional gender socialisation is for society.

    it irritates me so much that lesbians raising “normal” straight boys who can play football and objectify women is something anyone actually thinks is important.

  4. Thumb up 5

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    “Gender socialization is one of many elements of family life we’ve been bred to see as “essential” when in truth, gender socialization in and of itself has never met the needs of the individual, only the larger system which benefits those already in power.”

    Arrghh! This. This sentence exactly!

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    I’m kind of feeling that obsessing over the question “do children need a male role model” prioritizes men and furthers the misconception that men are necesary everywhere. It bugs me! I know many men have trouble shaking off their own self importance, but shouldn’t we be more concerned with helping parents raise confident, understanding, balanced children, as opposed to kids who fit the “normal” mold that children who grew up around queer people probably look at with a raised eyebrow anyway?

    Children are more resourceful than they are given credit for. They can find role models in area that they have interest in. You don’t have to look up to men just because you’re a boy or vice versa. That’s based off a silly premise.

    In what universe is their a deficit of men in power or heterosexuality? Seriously, fine it for me. I wouldn’t mind paying it a visit…

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      These are basically all of my thoughts too.

      Its not like kids are starving for role models, they have other kids and aunts/uncles and teachers and y’know, Barbie to teach them all about the patriarchy. Pretty sure that if boys are locked in a house with their parents and no TV for 21 years, there are far worse things happening than a lack of male role models. I absolutely understand why its useful, but I’m still really irked that people are studying whether guys are learning to fit into a shitty system well enough. I’m calling it a win if we’re teaching kids how not to do that, no matter who their parents are.

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    I feel like there are so many, much bigger factors to healthy psychological, social, etc development than parent gender/sexuality, it seems like such a stupid divide. The raising people as people thing is so true, and I feel like that’s related to how much a parent respects their kid (and their partner if they have one), and that’s not necessarily a queer thing. I’m thinking of all the queer and straight/cis parents who celebrate their kid(s) regardless of their place among society’s rigid standards, the parents who support and love their weirdo kid, their geeky kid, their disabled kid, their trans* kid. I want the science of super champion parents.

  7. Thumb up 2

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    I feel like Andrea Gibson (as well as Riese) has this one on lockdown. Watch “Blue Blanket,” but keep in mind it’s pretty graphically about sexual abuse. The last line makes me cry every time.

  8. Thumb up 15

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    “But I hope I’m not alone in wishing that once we get through this part — the part where many among us feel pressure to appear “just like everybody else” in order to gain legal rights — that we can emerge on the other side with our special snowflakeness intact.” – THIS

    I am not a perfect parent and my children are not perfect either. I look forward to a time when we can be imperfect without it somehow reflecting on the fact that I happen to love women.

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      “I look forward to a time when we can be imperfect without it somehow reflecting on the fact that I happen to love women.”

      yesss! i wanna have the right to accidentally raise an asshole just like everyone else.
      an asshole with a dope alternative lifestyle haircut, who rolls a fat organic tobaccao smoke and cow-tips politicians for fun.

      also, I am around mad queers that have kids and they’re the best kids ever and have a solid grasp of all the ways people can be awesome. they run, jump and play just like all the other kids ‘cept minus most of the obscene/oppressive bullying and they often have better developed imaginations.

      somehow I know unicorns play a strong role in all of this.

  9. Thumb up 7

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    I would like to add a polyamory spin on this because I think it’s interesting and somewhat relevant to this article. I’m quoting the book, “Polyamory in the 21st Century: Love and Intimacy with Multiple Partners by Deborah Anapol from Chapter 7: Polyamory & Children. These quotes are taken from the first few pages.

    —————————————————————————
    “Many people assume that it’s harmful for children to have more than two parents. Of course, multiple parents are common in stepfamilies, where a child may have as many as four parents from two blended families. In the many cultures where polygyny is permitted, children often grow up with several mothers who cooperate in caring for each other’s children. And from time immemorial, older brothers and sisters, as well as extended families of grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins, have shared family compounds and taken on significant roles as caretakers. One of the most indelible images from all my travels is a slender elderly man with wizened face squatting beside a toddler just after dawn in the outskirts of a village in central India. This man looked at the little one, who I imagined to be his grandchild, with a look of such love and devotion that I literally stopped in my tracks, unable to shift my gaze.”

    “As extended families who live together become increasingly rare, especially in the affluent West, polyamorous families are one way that some people are counteracting the isolation of the lone nuclear family and finding ways to provide at-home caretakers for children. Others gravitate toward co-housing or intentional communities that may or may not be monogamously oriented but where adults share some responsibility for child rearing.”

    “Several studies have been done on stepfamilies and children reared communally, but there is still a dearth of research investigating the important question of how polyamory affects children. At the same time, the impact on children is one of the most commonly asked questions whenever the subject of polyamory is raised. Dr. Elisabeth Sheff is an assistant professor of sociology at Georgia State University. She conducted her doctoral research on polyamorous families with children in the mid-1990’s and later decided to attempt a longitudinal study of these and other poly families. So far, she’s following about thirty families with three or more adults living together who have children between the ages of six and twenty. She’d like to double that and include an ethically and culturally more diversified group before publishing her findings but says that funding for research on polyamory is scarce.”

    “Dr. Sheff’s research focuses on families where three or more adults in committed relationships jointly share responsibility for child rearing. However, open marriages are far more common than group marriages and consequently are impacting many more children. Single parents with intimate networks also are increasingly common and present a similar milieu for children in many respects. All these types of multipartner relationships may shape children’s experiences in a variety of ways that have not even begun to be considered, except by theorists and the parents themselves, let alone researched.”

    “In the absence of existing research on polyamorous families, Dr. Sheff has looked to the research on children of gays and lesbians for clues. There’s a fair amount of this research, she says, because much of it is funded from within the gay and lesbian communities themselves who have a “we are family” campaign that funds research as well as political activity. The lion’s share of sexuality research money is also going to the study of gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgendered (GLBT) issues, and the little funding that exists for family research comes mostly from conservative groups for whom polyamory is not of interest. The GLBT research has found that essentially all the pressure the children of homosexual parents face is from outside the family. In other words, nothing has been found in the families themselves that’s a problem for the children, but they do encounter judgments, prejudice, and negative attitudes from outsiders, such as teachers or neighbors, or are concerned about appearing different. The same appears to be somewhat true for children in polyamorous families, although one bisexual poly parent told me that his teenage son’s perception was that polyamory was more acceptable than bisexuality among his peers.”
    —————————————————————————

    Interestingly and ironically enough, if these defenders of “male role models” want to purport that children are being affected psychologically, then I dare say, that the reason that is so, is because of them. They are the “outsiders” that this polyamory book is speaking of, they are the people who affect children psychologically because they do not tolerate difference, they judge because a child has a different familial background to what they are accustomed to. Instead of accepting children as people, a human being, they are judged by something that is out of their control, then made to feel “less than” when they had no say in their familial background. How dare anyone judge a person based on their family background, as if they had a choice and even if they had a choice, it doesn’t matter, if their basic needs are being met. Anyways, that’s just another little perception to ponder within the context of this article.

  10. Thumb up 7

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    this was so good, I can’t even

    I don’t know what would happen if “proper gender socialization” was no longer a thing that mattered, but I do think that, similar to gays getting married, the sky would not fall down.

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    When I came out as trans to my parents, they freaked and went to a psychologist to try and get a hold of things. Unfortunately, the psych they visited basically said that since my father was away for business a lot, that I modeled after my mother and that women were unfit to raise boys on their own and blah blah blah… patriarchy.

    It tore me up that she believed it – the fact is I looked up to my parents for many different things and I never thought much of it in a gendered sense – and the things I looked up to my mother weren’t even stereotypical-feminine-ideals. Particularly, I look back and think of how I admired her tenacity and strength (especially in the face of gender-biases).

    I wish we didn’t have to ask this overly-wrought question of “appropriate” gendered learning, I always had trouble with certain emotions that I felt tremendously but was told I could not display. Now i value them and know that those binary strictures caused me lots of pain by devaluing my emotions and telling me they were not valid.

  12. Thumb up 7

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    These studies always seem to me to have a massive issue with the way we view children as well as parenting. Do we still think of kids as a Tabla Rasa, an empty vessel waiting to be filled? When do we stop blaming the parenting and start accepting that certain personality traits are just a natural part of who the kid is?

    I’ve heard plenty of anecdotes and seen first hand that no matter how hard you try to raise your kids to be one thing, if they lean another way by nature then they’ll grow that way. Hands on hearts, how many of us were genuinely raised with the option that “queer is ok”? And yet here we all are.

  13. Thumb up 2

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    In a perfect world, “proper gender socialization” and the like wouldn’t be a big deal. But that would also be the world where I could marry my girlfriend, have her recognized as a parent to our kids, and maybe get some health insurance. And since the world we live in is far from perfect, sometimes it’s nice to have studies like this to point to and say “See? SEE? I’m not raising a house full of man-hating future terrorists after all!”

    And it can really wear you down when you find yourself at yet another family function, explaining that it’s perfectly ok for your little boy to play with baby dolls. Or when some other parent makes a comment at school and you spend the whole ride home having yet another tearful discussion about all families being different and special. And when get that worn down, and you doubt your own parenting skill, and maybe the teeniest tiniest little part of you for a split second thinks that maybe those evangelical bible bashers are right? Well then it’s nice to read this stuff and remind YOURSELF that your probably not doing such a bad job after all.

    Although really, if anyone is still doubting lesbian parenting ability at this point, you’re free to come take a look at our cereal cabinets. I’ve got a cupboard full of granola that says more than any long term study.

  14. Thumb up 3

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    i agree so much with this article!!! and i don’t agree a whole lot with ‘making sure kids get proper gender socialization’ but if we are going to worry about it, why aren’t we worried about girls in mostly male-adult households (with 2 daddies and the like)?!…and by ‘we’ i mean society not us on autostraddle so much, cuz i’m pretty sure we (on here) all agree that female (and trans*!) role models are pretty stellar and important for all humans, especially since we’ve got the patriarchy in charge

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      Because of the patriarchy. No literally, men/boys are held in higher regard than women/girls so therefore it’s more important that boys learn how to be men and have “proper gender socialization.” Also because of the fucked up double standard that it’s okay for girls to exhibit traditionally “masculine” traits but it’s wrong for a boy to exhibit traditionally “feminine” traits. So if a girl is being raised by men and she’s a tomboy and likes sports that’s nothing to worry about but god forbid a boy being raised by women is sensitive and likes ballet. (I’m just using some stereotypical examples of gender norms here, you get me.)

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    Why is it that none of these studies harping on the primacy of having a man in the house examine what kind of male role models are good for children? As long as there’s a man around, nevermind the quality of his parenting/mentoring. Many children who grow up with married heterosexual parents still don’t have male role models who teach their children not to sexually harass, abuse or coerce others. Many boys who grow up without a proper understanding and respect for consent did/do actually have fathers and stepfathers around.
    Kids need parents who don’t coercively force normative gender roles on them and teach them to respect others. I think it’s actually important for kids to have cis dude role models who aren’t sexist, abusive or bigoted, because kids need to see that there are nontoxic flavors of cisgendered masculinity. All it takes though is one teacher or coach or uncle. My best male role model, who I credit with teaching me it was possible for men to be feminist, wasn’t my father, it was a friend’s father. I think we need to focus on why standards for fatherhood are so low before we insist on having one in every house.

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      “I think we need to focus on why standards for fatherhood are so low before we insist on having one in every house.”

      This. Why are “failings” to conform to horrible gendered social notions always placed on the mother as well? Oh, Dad was away all the time so the son had to turn to Mom as a role-model? IT’S HER FAULT SHE’S GAY.

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        “I think we need to focus on why standards for fatherhood are so low before we insist on having one in every house.”

        This. Why are “failings” to conform to horrible gendered social notions always placed on the mother as well? Oh, Dad was away all the time so the son had to turn to Mom as a role-model? IT’S HER FAULT HE’S GAY.

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    I feel like Autostraddle and it’s readers are about 563 steps ahead of the general public when it comes to ideas about sexuality, gender, etc. So while I agree that putting “proper gender socialization” up on some pedestal, like that’s the ultimate goal, is really fucked up and backwards, I also think it’s important that we have studies like this to show all those people who still think queer people can’t or shouldn’t raise children that we CAN raise kids, just as well if not better than they can, based on THEIR standards of what’s good for children/society. I also think this puts pressure on us to want our kids to be “normal” but hopefully we’re all smart enough to know that there is no such thing as “normal” and really we should just want our kids to be happy.

    We have a girl so we don’t have to deal with the whole “oh your son needs a male role model how is he going to learn to be a man” thing, but we still think it’s important that she has positive relationships with men as she grows up. Which she does. We also think it’s important that she has positive relationships with women who are not her moms, and she has that too. Basically I don’t think it matters who raises a child, as long as that child is raised with love and respect.

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    Hmmm… Maybe all-female households are THE most natural kind of household ever. Back in the day when males had to hunt for food (sometimes for several days in a row), females were the ones to raise the kids on their own. The boys would be around women all of the time – until they were old enough to hunt with the men. And still, not all of the turned out to be c*cksucking sissies – or we wouldn’t be here today, right? ;)

  18. Thumb up 1

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    My mom’s best friend came to visit w/ her partner and their five-year-old-son, Gabe. He’s an adorable blur of gap-toothed perpetual motion, like every other kid.
    He enjoys power rangers, star wars, and dancing (which, apart from the later, are socially acceptable male interests.)
    The only problem the Gender Police would have is that he can’t ever get pronouns straight (pun intended).
    Gabe (talking about my sister: He’s back!
    Mom: you mean she. She’s a she.
    Gabe: My moms’ ALL she.

  19. Thumb up 1

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    I have a 6 year old boy and I did stress about not having a male role model and actually still stress from time to time. All the comments and thoughts are great and I especially loved this article. However, as some boys get older it can be hard on them not having a Dad. My son was very sad when he was about 5 and realized he didn’t have a “Dad” As time has gone on, and he has met other families with single Moms, and some with 2 Dads, etc. he has come to accept and appreciate his 2 Moms. I am so proud as he is a creative and compassionate soul who happens to be a fantastic athlete/dancer. He has learned so much from other male teachers, babysitters, grandfathers about being a good person who happens to be male. This is all how we raised him and what he was exposed too. Thank you for bringing up this excellent issue.

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    You know, the notion that “kids need a male role model” in their nuclear family actually makes more sense if you happen to live squarely at the intersection of pseudo-traditionalist fundamentalism and helicopter-parenting paranoia, where you can keep kids in an environment devoid of adult men:

    – Kids are homeschooled to protect them from evil non-parental influences
    – And generally kept at home as much as possible, because outside the world is swarming with child abductors
    – And if they ever have contact with other families, it’s a carefully screened set of known righteous families where Dads are rarely around because they’re righteously away working long hours so that their wives can righteously be full-time homemakers just like your mom

    … and now you really can have a situation where a biological father is a kid’s only chance to get to know an adult male. Also, the kids will grow up totally neurotic.

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    This is a fleshing article & reaffirming to me as a mother. My kids HAD a father until he decided to take himself out of this world by suicide 3 years ago. My sons- all three of them- have been more impacted by their fathers suicide than they ever have been about having a lesbian mother. They’re proud of me, our family & the love that we all share with my partner. So far, I have three beautiful, well adjusted teenaged sons whom I couldn’t be more proud of. The proof is in the pudding, I always say. I feel like our family serves as a positive role model for other kids that know mine, as well as for the community around us. It IS possible to raise healthy boys without a father, despite the worst of circumstances!

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    “which I think we can easily blame on the patriarchy.”
    If that’s not anti male bias I don’t know what is.
    This study has quite a few flaws. Unfortunately I haven’t the time to explain everything.

    I’ll just say one thing. Quite a number of serial killers and psychopaths were raised by single mothers.

    Boys now are lagging behind girls in school at a alarming rate.

    When’s the last time anyone could point out a positive male role model?

    Feminist have slowly destroyed the young male developments over the years. It’s a damn shame and the reason I’m leaving the states soon to raise my family overseas in a place where it’s ok to be male.

    Screw you feminist :P

  23. Thumb up 0

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    The connection between “not having male role models” and “being raised by same-sex parents” is tentative at best, discriminatory at worst. Kids have role models who aren’t their parents. Teachers, coaches, youth leaders, etc.

    Personally, I think that all kids should have role models of *all* genders in their lives. And from the first part of the article, it seems like most female same-sex couples realize this and actively try to make male role models a part of their children’s lives. So where’s the problem, again?

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